The One
by Misao22
Summary: An old friend of Emma's boyfriend moves back to Boston and she is more than attracted to him. The thing is, he is also attracted to her. And this is the story of how Emma and Killian found each other, not being able to do anything about it. Not at first!
1. Chapter 1

**Emma**.

She remembers the exact moment she laid eyes on him. He is by far the most handsome man she had ever seen. The thing is, she was sitting on bar's stool, sipping a beer waiting for her boyfriend. Usually she doesn't go around flirting with random men. But this was different, he was different. She just couldn't stop staring into those smoldering blue eyes. Then it happened, he spoke. The guy had this Brit accent, with a raspy voice, and her traitorous body reacted to it, everything about him was sinful. She forgot what was she doing there, she forgot that she was waiting for her boyfriend, she just let herself go and flirted back. Suddenly she heard Neal's voice saying "Nice, you already met" when she turned around he gave her a quick kiss on the lips and turned around to give a friendly hug to the sexy man she just flirted with. Exactly in that moment she remembered why she was in this bar waiting for Neal, he wanted to introduce her to an old friend of his who moved back to Boston, someone with a weird name she couldn't remember, someone who's becoming Neal's new roommate. While the man hugged Neal, she could see the confused look in his eyes. And that's the story of how she awkwardly met Killian Jones.

Now, this man is turning her world upside down. He moved in with Neal, and she was running out of excuses to not spend the night at her boyfriend's. And when she did, she left the room only when she was certain Killian was still sleeping or already gone for work. The unsettling part of it was the reason she was avoiding him those mornings, because is not ok that you want to avoid this other man so he doesn't know that you are sleeping with your boyfriend, as if she was cheating on him or something, probably that was more on the area of cheating mentally to her boyfriend. It was so confusing.

Killian's been always a gentleman. He has never said or done anything to make her uncomfortable, he is a flirt but he is respectful. She has never really seen him with a girl, even when Neal is always praying on Killian's skill to get the most beautiful girl wherever he found himself at. And there was this uncomfortable feeling when Neal talked about Killian's women, this feeling she was against calling jealousy. How could she be jealous? They flirted briefly the day they met, before they knew their mutual connection to Neal.

Neal is her first real boyfriend, they've been together for two years now. He is the person who stayed around the longest, he's been the only constant in her whole life, and she loves him, very much. Their relationship it might not be as passionate as it was in the beginning. But that's what happens, right? Passion fades, and you become more like best friends, right? They talked about moving in together, but then Killian showed up in town and Neal was fast to give him his spare room. So she guessed he wasn't ready yet, but that was okay, she didn't think she was either.

"A penny for your thoughts" her body reacted like it did every time she heard that voice. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end, and her cheeks turned lightly red. She looked up towards the sound, and those damn blue eyes were staring at her green ones.

"Nothing worthy of a penny" she said with a friendly smile. She was sitting in a coffee shop with a forgotten book in her hands, leaning on the table. She straightened up on the chair.

"Sorry to bother you, love. I walked in to get a coffee and saw you sitting here, I wouldn't forgive myself if I didn't approach to say hi" he said with a beautiful smile.

"Oh, Hi then" she smiled back.

"Hi… umm… I'm gonna sit over here and let you go back to your book…or your thoughts" he said scratching behind his ear and sat on the only available table, right in front of hers. Emma couldn't stop looking at his every move. Killian sat on the chair facing her, put his coffee in front of him, took a book out of his satchel and Emma couldn't stop thinking that Neal never read anything, in fact hated when she was reading on the time they spent together, so that was why she was sitting on a coffee shop reading a book. Killian looked up, and their eyes met again "Is everything ok?" he asked.

"Yeah…everything is fine" she answered giving him a tight smile, he nodded and when he was about to get back to his book she couldn't help herself and asked "How are you?"

"Actually, my day is getting better" he answered with a smile.

"I'm glad to hear" she smiled back.

"How are you?" he asked with obvious curiosity.

"I'm fine…you know, this is stupid. Why don't we just share the same table… promise I can be quiet" he didn't answer, he just started picking up his things to move them to her table.

"It's ok if you are chatty…we never get a chance to really talk about anything" he said when he was sited right in front of her on the same table.

"So…from what I collected your day hasn't been that good"

"No it hasn't. I could use the company"

"Sure" Emma said with a friendly smile.

"It's just…my brother…today was supposed to be his birthday" he said looking intently to his cup of coffee.

"Oh… I'm so sorry" that was information enough to understand his brother was gone, and Emma felt a weight on her chest.

"That's ok, love. There is nothing we can do about it now" he answered looking again to her eyes, with a sad smile on his face.

"Do you wanna talk about it… about him?" Emma asked and saw how he took a long breath, and she hated the obvious sadness that took him right there, she wanted to sooth him, to comfort him. But they weren't that close, so she just wanted to be as supportive as she could.

"He…Liam, his name was Liam. He was a better man than I, of that I'm sure" he assured her with a sad smile "He would have liked you"

"Me?" Emma asked surprised.

"Aye, you. He always said 'Little brother pick the most beautiful, smart and generous lass you meet, that's the one'" he said, and Emma's heart started pounding loudly and fast in her chest.

"He would have picked me?" she managed to asked, and somehow she manages to say 'he' and not 'you'.

"I really hope he wouldn't have picked you" He answered with a smile.

"Why?" she couldn't stop the question from leaving her lips.

"Because I don't think I could have denied him anything" he said, and Emma furrowed her eyebrows contemplating his answer. Why was she hoping that he meant that he was the one who would have picked her it was beyond her. But she was, and before she could say anything a waitress interrupted them, asking if they wanted to refill their coffees. Both of them said they were ok. Emma got back to her book, but after no less than five minutes she excused herself, she needed to get away from him as far and as fast as she could. This conversation was too much. So she said a quick goodbye and walked out of the coffee shop leaving Killian behind. She took her phone and called Neal, she needed Neal, he is her boyfriend, and he's the one who is supposed to make her feel things. Killian was just a very good looking guy, who was an expert flirting with women. She has never seen Killian with any woman, at all. But obviously they just throw themselves at him, who wouldn't. Well, not her, she has a boyfriend.

She arrived at Neal's place and jumped on him as soon as he opened the door. At first Neal was confused, but soon he understood what Emma was doing, so he carried her to his bedroom happy that she for some reason wanted to do this in the middle of a Saturday's afternoon, they never made love in the middle of the afternoon, but he was willing if she was.

Emma tried hard not to think of Killian, but every time she closed her eyes she kept seeing him staring at her. So she did her best not to keep her eyes closed for long. She was distracted to say the least, so eventually she stopped expecting to find her climax, so she focused on helping Neal finding his. He didn't mind if she didn't find her release, he never minded, and lately her release didn't come often. When it was done, Neal was smiling for the happy surprise she gave him, asking her to do that more often. He had a job meeting with his dad in less than an hour, so he got up to take a bath. Emma was more confused than before, because making love with Neal didn't help at all, now she was sexually frustrated, still thinking about Killian.

 **Killian.**

Today, like every year after his brother's passing, Killian was moody and grim. Until he walked into that coffee shop, wanting to buy a coffee to go, so he could sit in the adjacent park to lose himself in the fiction of his book. Then he saw her, she was there as beautiful as always, lost in her thoughts. He almost left the place, but he couldn't, she was right there by herself. So he approached and said hello. For some lucky reason she invited him to her table, and he found himself talking about his brother, and fucking up their meeting.

He must be the most stupid person that ever existed. The first time he had an alone conversation with her, and he had to blow it up by practically saying he would have picked her, over anyone. His roommate was her boyfriend for crying out loud. But he couldn't help himself, this woman had bewitched him since the very first time he laid eyes on her. To be honest, he's never been into blonds. But that night two months ago, when he walked into that bar to meet his old friend Neal and his girlfriend, he saw the beautiful blond sitting by herself at the bar and he was attracted like a moth to the fire. But he's never been a lucky guy, this beautiful siren was Neal's girlfriend.

Neal offered his spare room before he even moved back to Boston. He told him that it would be helping him a lot, because his girlfriend was talking about moving in and he was not ready for that, he told Neal to be honest with her. But Neal was set on his idea of using Killian as an excuse, and for him it was just convenient arriving Boston having a place to live. But it has not been easy seeing Emma with Neal all the time, the more he got to know her, the more he admired her. She worked as a social worker, and to him that was one of the most amazing jobs anyone can have, the way she talked about the kids she was helping it was so passionate, that his admiration for her only kept growing. Now he feared leaving his living arrangement, the thought of Emma moving in with Neal was unpleasant. It was silly, but he was not ready for moving out.

As soon as he finished his coffee he left the Coffee Shop. He walked straight home, and as soon as he opened the door he realized this day it definitely could get worst. The sweater she was wearing earlier, one of her shoes, a shirt that must be Neal's, a freaking Bra, were all scattered all over the living room, in a trail that led to Neal's room. Killian furrowed his eyebrows, and hesitated at the door, not knowing what to do. He decided that maybe he needed this, he needed to realized once and for all that Emma Swan was taken. And even when he never saw her leave the apartment in the mornings, Neal and her were together so they would have sex like any couple would. And he definitely needed to find another place to live, and a date. He has not been on a date since he met Emma. He walked out again, and closed the door. He took his phone and called the only other person he trusted in this city, because he needed a drink, and drinking alone was a NO tonight.

He walked into a pub, and a petite blond girl was waiting for him at the bar "I wasn't expecting your call today" said the girl as soon as he sat next to her.

"Well love, nonetheless you were free as usual"

"Hey, I'm the supporting friend here. I thought I was going out tonight with fun Killian, and I've got cranky Killian"

"I'm sorry Tink, it was rude of me" Tink was a friend he made at College, when he was still living in Boston all those years ago.

"Is this about Emma?" she asked and he frowned "This is definitely about Emma" she turned to ask the bartender for a couple glasses of rum, Killian let out a sigh "The Killian I remember had a girl at every port. Now you are pining for a girl that's taken…that has to stop Jones"

"I agree with you for once. So let's start by getting me drunk" they clinked the glasses the bartender just gave them.

He never told Tink about his feelings for Emma, but she noticed the first time they all hang out together a month ago. She said that it was obvious by the way they looked at each other, and of course Killian had noticed the way Emma is always looking at him, he just didn't want to get his hopes up, maybe it was all on his mind. Until Tink pointed it out, she also said that Neal has to be really stupid not to notice. Tink was not a big fan of Neal, she tolerated him for Killian's sake.

Around midnight, Tink was walking Killian home. Yes she was walking him, because he decided to drink all the rum he could endure, and now she was left with the consequence of that. Thank god they were close to his place. She knew Killian well enough, and he was not a guy who talked his heart out, he drank his heart out and occasionally said something important about what he was feeling. When they were standing outside the apartment Killian was giggling trying to hide the keys from her, because he was against going home, he wanted to keep drinking. At least Killian was a fun drunk, it could be worst. She was not that drunk but had enough to drink to start giggling herself, she finally grabbed the keys but on a really fast move Killian took them back and tossed them inside his pants.

"You really think that's going to stop me? Bad form Jones" she said raising an eyebrow. Killian realized that indeed that was not going to stop her and grabbed her hand a millimeter from the waistband of his jeans. Tink took the challenge and with her free hand she started tickling over his waist. Involuntarily he started laughing losing grip on Tink's hand, so she got her hand inside his pants in the exact moment the door burst open. They both freeze when they saw Emma Swan in front of them, a scowl replacing her surprised look.

"You shouldn't be doing _that_ in the middle of the hallway" Emma said walking inside looking angry. Killian removed Tink's hand from where it was, his giddiness forgotten.

"Let me handle this" Tink whispered to Killian before she walked inside behind Emma "Sorry if we wake you up" Tink put a bright smile on her face for Emma, who gave her a quick look still frowning.

"I was awake…you guys only interrupted my tv show. I'm waiting for Neal" she answered giving a quick look towards Killian. He was moving carefully, staying as quiet as he could, letting Tink handle things, whatever she meant with that.

"So…you two?" Emma asked looking Killian in the eyes.

"Perhaps" he answered looking more confident than he was. Tink smiled softly, her eyes traveling from Emma to Killian.

"Well…I'll let you two to your staring contest. I'm going to bed. Are you coming babe?" she asked with a grin on her face, turning around walking into the direction of Killian's bedroom. He followed her close.

"What that hell was that?" he asked as soon as they were inside his bedroom.

"She saw it coming, let her be jealous" she said as explanation.

"What are you talking about?"

"Oh come on! Don't tell me you didn't notice that. I know you are drunk, but you are not blind" she pointed out "She is into you, how can you not see that?"

"She has a bloody boyfriend, and she was fucking him a few hours ago…so no, I don't think she is _into_ me" he answered throwing himself on the bed, covering his eyes with his right forearm.

"The girl will hate my gut from now on. But I can take it, she deserves better than Neal" she said making a disgust face at the name Neal "I'm all team Killian"

"You are nuts"

"If we are gonna make her believe you are fucking me, I can't leave this place in a few hours. So make room for me, and no funny business"

"How exactly is this going to help 'Team Killian'?" he asked moving to give her space on the bed.

"Girls don't like competition. Trust me, I'm a girl. I know you see me more like your mate, but I'm a girl, I know these things." she explained, and Killian looked confused.

"That doesn't make sense" he complained.

"You wait and see".


	2. Chapter 2

**Tink.**

She woke up a bit disoriented, the wall she was facing it was not familiar to her. She turned slowly and saw Killian sleeping next to her, and then she remembered last night's events. Suddenly the unmistakable smell of coffee reached the bedroom and she got up like a zombie. She straightened her clothes, got in the bathroom to meet her human needs, and followed the smell outside to the kitchen, where Emma was about to fill a cup.

"Oh, that smell is amazing. Is there enough for a poor girl?" she asked sitting in a stool of the kitchen island.

"Sure" Emma answered taking another cup and pouring the hot liquid in it and giving it to her. And Tink noticed how Emma's eyes gave a quick look in Killian's bedroom direction.

"Thank you, you are so kind" she said before taking a long sip. Emma drank her coffee staring pointedly at her, not so secretly assessing her "Did Neal arrive safely?" she asked startling Emma.

"Huh?" she asked confused.

"Neal? You said last night you were waiting for him"

"Oh…yeah...well he didn't, I forgot he was staying with his dad" a flash of disappointment crossed Emma's eyes and Tink knew the girl was lying. Then Tink decided to adventured on a more fun and interesting topic.

"I'm sorry about disturbing your…tv show last night. Killian was being an ass" she apologized with a smile.

"That's ok. Just…you shouldn't be doing _that_ in the hallway"

"The only thing I was doing was trying to get his ass inside… He was reluctant to stop drinking and wanted to hide the keys from me so we could go back to the bar, that was all" the girl explained with a smile.

"I didn't know you were a thing" Emma said looking slightly more serious than before.

"Well, we are very good friends. He was not in a good place yesterday. I was just trying to help"

"By sleeping with him?" Emma blurted out and she really looked like she said out loud something she was thinking and was embarrassed. Tink smiled softly.

"Well, we did sleep together. But we didn't plan the evening to end up like that…we are not a thing, we are just friends" she explained being as vague as she could, but trying to be clear stating that Killian was available. After that Emma excused herself and disappeared behind Neal's bedroom door.

Tink smiled widely, satisfied with being certain that Emma was indeed into Killian. And that girl deserved better than Neal. She met Neal at college, right after Killian. And the guy always has been a dark cloud, trouble was always following him. Killian never believed her, but she was sure that he was the reason money disappear from her purse sometimes, and when an expensive watch her mom gave her disappear from her bedroom two nights after he spent a lot of time asking her questions about it, she was certain that Neal was bad news. But Killian was right, she didn't have a way to prove it, so she got extra careful with her belongings around him. She didn't trust him, and she liked Emma. Emma was an honest, passionate, driven person who deserved better than Neal. And Killian Jones was an improvement. She's never been interested romantically in Killian, she loves him like a brother, he is raw honest with her all the time, that's what she loves about their friendship, and when a guy is disgustingly honest with you all the time, is hard to be attracted to him.

Usually she wouldn't encourage Killian pursuing a girl who's already in a relationship. But she has never seen Killian Jones looking at a girl the way he looks at Emma Swan. The first time she noticed she talked him out of it, then she noticed the way Emma's eyes were always on him, how attentive she got every time Killian was saying something. Now the girl was jealous of her, and Neal was screwing up their relationship. The night Killian invited her to meet Emma and Neal, she noticed how Neal's eyes where always on any other girl but his girlfriend, how not as a couple they interacted but more like friends. Maybe that was the reason for Killian to let himself fall this far into her, she was a lonely girl, and even with her boyfriend she looked lonely.

She knows Killian's life has been surrounded by a lot of crap, with her mother dying, his father abandonment, Liam's death, then all the Milah crap. He was not the best on dealing with things, taking a lot of wrong decisions. She was the one who convinced him to get back to Boston, where she could be near to help him trough everything, because for some reason he always listens to her, well most of the time.

 **Killian.**

A headache, a terrible headache. Killian turned around in bed and opened his eyes slowly. His first thought was Emma's clothes all around the apartment. Damn, he really needs a new place to live. This was masochism, well maybe it was one of many wrong decisions he has made, always taking the worst choice possible, maybe the suffering makes him feel alive, 'cause nothing else does.

Tink was nowhere to be seen, so he knew she already left. That girl was crazy, thinking that making Emma jealous was even possible. He got up from bed, noticing that he was still wearing last night clothes. He removed everything except his boxer briefs, and walked to the kitchen to get a glass of water before taking a bath. He took a sip and then started massaging his forehead. Suddenly he heard a low gasp and something falling to the floor, he opened his eyes immediately to find Emma standing a few steps from him, something was on the floor in front of her. But what he really noticed was the way Emma's eyes traveled around his body, making him feel totally naked. Ok maybe he was mostly naked, her eyes were stuck on his abs, and he smiled, because it's always a good feeling when a girl is staring to you like that. He cleared his throat just to get her eyes back to his.

"I'm sorry" she said blushing.

"I'm the one who's sorry, lass. I thought I was alone. Just grabbing a glass of water" he explained with a smirk on his face.

"Umm…ok…I was just leaving" she awkwardly turned to leave then turned back again to grab her purse from the floor.

"Ahhmm…right…Do you…Dou you have something for a terrible headache?" he asked grasping on something to keep her around for a few more seconds, because he definitely had some pills in his bedroom. Emma started looking in her purse without looking at him and too soon found something. She grabbed a couple of pills and he watched as she debated between leaving the pills on the counter or handing them to him. She made her choice and approached him, close enough to hand the pills.

"Here" she said putting the pills on his hand and turning around way to fast.

"Thanks…Ummm…Is Neal around?" he asked curious to her back as she closed her purse again.

"No. He…he is at his dad's"

"This early?"

"He spent the night there" she explained. And that was weird, Neal and his father never got along that well, Neal wouldn't stay at his father's even if his life depended on it. But he didn't push it, Emma looked stress about the topic. She grabbed her stuff, said goodbye and left the apartment.

Killian drank the rest of his water and for some stupid reason felt happy, happy to know she spent the night but no one slept with her, yes a really stupid reason to feel happy, because she didn't look happy about it, but no one could blame him, it was just a stupid thought that made him feel better than yesterday.

 **Emma.**

As soon as she closed the door to Neal's apartment she grabbed a deep breath, as if for the last couple minutes while she was talking to an almost naked Killian she was unable to breathe. Damn he was hot. This guy had to have something wrong about him, no one is that good looking. His underwear left nothing to the imagination, his abs where tight and his arms looked strong and masculine. And damn it, she was screwed.

Neal is her boyfriend, Neal is not that terrible looking. He is not as fit as Killian, but is good looking enough, and she loves him. She has to stop this thing with Killian, this stupid crush she has on him. She knows that things between Neal and her had been weird lately, even before Killian arrived, Neal was acting strange. She has been working a lot the past year, her job was really important to her, helping kids to get a good and nice home meant the world to her, and Neal never understood why she spent so much time trying to help this kids. But she thinks this is just a rough patch on their relationship. She waited for Neal for hours last night, she called him but the calls went straight to voicemail. When she woke up in the morning, all alone and starting to really worry about him she got a text message, telling her he stayed with his dad, when she tried to call all she got was voicemail again. And yes, this was really strange behavior.

Right now she just wanted to go home, she decided to take a walk, Neal borrowed her bug yesterday, so she thought maybe walking was better for her than taking the bus, her apartment is not that far away, she could use the exercise, for her body and her mind. Her thoughts soon drifted off to the kids she's been trying to find a home for, twins, and she was adamant on keeping them together, she made a promise and she was going to hold to that promise until the end, but it was not as simple as it sounds, to find parents who were willing to take two kids at once was difficult, but not impossible, so she was going to try.

Suddenly a petite blond who looked anything like Tink, put the memory of last night in the front of her mind, opening the door to find Tink's hand inside Killian's pants was a shock, but watching them walk inside his bedroom was even worse. She repeated like a mantra to herself "I'm not jealous" until she fell asleep. Then in the morning Tink walked out of his bedroom like if it was the most natural thing on the world, like if it wasn't the first time she did that. "She is not that pretty, Killian could definitely do better" she thought and immediately regretted it, Tink was pretty…and nice…and honest…and probably a very good person. And she liked her since the moment she met her, with her sincere smile and joyful personality.

Ok, so she is pretty. But she doesn't deserve him, because if she found herself in Tink's position she wouldn't have walked out on him, she would have made breakfast for him, and take it to bed with a glass of water and a couple of pills for his headache, give him a massage, and jump on the shower together where she could…STOP. This was insane, she is not this person who lust on another man that's not her boyfriend. This had to stop, she needs to stop seeing him. So she would avoid Neal's apartment and any coffee shop or anywhere close to said apartment. She would focus on her job and Neal.


	3. Chapter 3

**Emma.**

Staying away was the dumbest idea Emma ever had. It was impossible, she really wanted to reconnect with Neal, bring back the spark they had a long time ago, and avoiding his home and friends was not going to help. So here she is, in front of Neal's apartment about to knock on the door. Neal's been busy lately; she has seen him briefly the past few days, so when he called earlier and asked her to go to his place because they were celebrating Killian's birthday tonight, she couldn't say no. But what really has her standing in front of the door like a coward is that she really wanted to come and not exactly to see Neal. She was holding a present for Killian, because when she heard about Killian's birthday she knew which was going to be the perfect birthday gift. So she went out and bought it, she considered not giving it to him at all, but she already had the gift so there was no harm in it. Probably everyone was giving him something, right?

She gathered the courage and knocked on the door after saving the present inside her purse, she'll find an appropriate moment to give it to him. She need it to stop feeling nervous about seeing Killian again, he is just a nice guy, with pretty eyes and hot as hell. The door opened before her thoughts dragged her to dangerous waters. And it was Tink, of course. Killian's girlfriend or girl-friend.

"Hi, Emma. Come in, don't you have a key or something?" The girl asked confused, well maybe she should have a key but Neal never offered one, and she never asked.

"Hello" she forced a smile and for some reason she didn't know Tink seemed amused with her and she didn't like it one bit, especially when she has no idea the reason why. And what bothered her most was when the girl turned around to say out loud...

"Killian, you have a special guest here"

Killian's stepped out of the kitchen with the blender in one hand. When he saw her, a sweet sincere smile took over his face, and Emma couldn't help but mirrored it "Happy Birthday" she said

"Thank you…Tell me Swan, would you like a Margarita?"

"Sure"

"Let me make those for you" interrupted Tink grabbing the Blender and pushing Killian towards Emma "Go have fun, introduce Emma to everyone" and it was when Tink said it that Emma realized there was other people on the living room staring quietly at them.

"Well, everyone this is Emma" Killian said putting an arm around her shoulders and turning her around so she could face the other people in the room. And she blushed when Killian's smell hit her, something masculine, but breezy, like the ocean and exotic flowers "Emma this is everyone" he said with a smile. A pretty girl with brown hair who was sitting beside a guy who probably was her boyfriend stood up and grabbed Emma's hand taking her away from Killian.

"Killian that's no way to introduce someone…I'm Belle, this is my boyfriend Will"

"Hello, love" said Will and gave her a wink.

"This is Mary Margaret and David" said Belle, and Mary Margaret stood up and hugged her. Emma was confused, and she gave a confused look to Killian.

"Sorry love, she does that"

"Oh don't be like that Killian, any friend of yours is a friend of us" said the brunet letting her go. Then she looked into her eyes "Is really nice meeting you Emma" The girl was so sincere that Emma felt a knot in her throat, where are this people coming from? Are they for real? Why is everyone so damn nice?

"Hello I'm David, don't worry my wife is the one with the hugging thing" he shook her hand and Emma smiled.

She sat down in the available couch and Killian sat down beside her, everyone started talking again. Emma took the opportunity to asked Killian quietly "Is Neal here?"

"Umm…He went out an hour ago, I thought he was picking you up" he replied

"No, He told me he'll meet me here" Emma answered thoughtful. And Killian was now giving her this look people was giving her lately; Neal has stood her up more than once this past month. She was blaming her infatuation with Killian, but last week she's been all Neal, and he kept on disappearing "I'm sure he'll be here soon" she assured him, although she was assuring herself. She texted Neal, and five minutes later she got a reply, he said he'll be there shortly.

She found herself enjoying the evening, Mary Margaret was a really nice person, and very interested in Emma's job, she is a teacher so she loves kids as much as her, and was very interested in Emma's line of work. Belle worked in a library, and the conversation between everyone was caring and intellectual, and Emma loved it. Not what she was expecting, so Killian's friends where amazing, another point for Killian, not like if she was keeping score, not at all. She learned that David and Mary Margaret are old friends with Tink and Killian, since college. And Will is a co-worker, they work at the docks or something with boats, she wasn't sure and she didn't ask. The whole evening was so stimulating and joyful that Emma lost track of time. When it was clear that Neal was not showing up, Emma took her drinking seriously. Killian tried to slow her down but was not successful.

 **Killian.**

Killian was happy watching Emma enjoy herself with his friends, it was not difficult for Mary Margaret and Belle to engage her in an interesting conversation. He relaxed when she stopped looking at her bloody watch every two minutes and began to smile and laugh. But eventually he noticed the way she was drinking, so he tried to delay the cocktails rounds, until Emma found a glass and the bottle of rum he was drinking from and started serving her own drinks. They had a great night, and he felt happy spending time with her, having little and casual conversations. He wasn't sure she'll show up, after the morning she saw him on his underwear she was clearly avoiding him. But he told Neal to invite her, he really needs Emma's phone number. Hopefully he'll get it tonight. You know, for friend's purposes only.

Everyone left, and Tink was supposed to stay behind to help him clean up. But after they close the door to their friends she grabbed his arm aggressively and got him inside the kitchen "I'm leaving, go get her a drink and do something" she stared at him pointedly.

"What do you mean?" he asked, but she didn't answer, she walked out of the kitchen and said goodbye to Emma. And Killian followed her to the door.

"I know I already gave you a birthday present, but this is my other birthday present. Go to her and let her know how you feel"

"She has a boyfriend"

"Where is he? I don't see him around, he is never around. Go tell her how you feel" she gave her a kiss goodbye in the cheek and left the apartment.

Killian was no coward, he simply was wary about Emma's feelings right now. She was stood up by her boyfriend again, he didn't think it was good form to overwhelm her right now with his feeling for her. But he may not get another chance, he was already apartment hunting, he was most definitely moving out. And even when Neal could walk in at any moment, he has to do it. He took the bottle of rum they were both drinking from and walk to the living room, when she saw him with the bottle in hand she extended her glass, he filled it half way and did the same with his glass.

"I thought Tink was staying here tonight" she said staring intently to her glass, he read her easily she was searching for a relationship update.

"Why would she stay here tonight?" he asked and then took a sip of rum.

"I don't know. Isn't that what you guys do?" she looked into his eyes, waiting for the answer.

"She is my best friend, nothing more" Emma looked away and smiled.

"You didn't answer my question, but it's ok, not my business"

"Are you staying here tonight?" Emma blushed and he smirked "waiting for Neal, I mean"

"I'm not waiting for Neal. We are celebrating your birthday, which reminds me I brought you a present" and when he heard that, he was really surprised.

"A present? You shouldn't have Swan" He said watching her walk towards her purse and take something out. She walked to him and extended the gift, the wrapping paper was full of sailboats, and a big blue bow was on top of it. He felt so warm inside, he wasn't expecting it. And it felt so good that she thought about it enough to pick a wrapping paper of something he loves. He grabbed the package and looked into her eyes "You really shouldn't have" he said with a sincere happy smile on his face. She smiled back.

"So open it" she said when she got back to her seat and notice he was still staring at the gift. He nodded once and carefully tear up the paper. It was a book, but not any book. It was a copy of Peter Pan.

"How did you know?" he asked looking amazed by it.

"I remembered you said once that this was your favorite book when you were growing up. I saw it and I couldn't stop myself. Do you like it?" she asked smiling happy with his reaction.

"Is perfect, is amazing…you are amazing, Emma…Thank you"

"Well it is my pleasure, especially now that I see your reaction" they both laugh. Emma took her glass and drank the rest of her rum "Is time for me to go…I really don't want to ran up to Neal right now" she said and Killian noticed her mood changing.

"Are you driving home? Because…don't get me wrong but you've been drinking quite a lot tonight. I can't let you drive like that" She looked at him for a few seconds.

"Will you walk me home?" she asked "I really don't wanna be alone right now"

"Of course, love. I'd love to walk you home"

"Are you always this polite? Are your friends always that polite?" she teased him.

"I try to be polite as much as I can. And my friends, well they are the optimistic kind of people, they keep my negativity in check"

They went out and started walking slowly in Emma's home direction. Killian could tell Emma was not happy about Neal not showing up, he wanted to do what Tink asked, take the opportunity to express his feelings, but Emma was vexed.

"You know, when I met Neal I was very lonely. I had never experienced love or even happiness, I know now that I've been trying to keep us together just to try and feel that again. But it is lost, and I can't find it, I keep looking but is nowhere" she started talking, confiding in him so he kept quiet, letting her talk, letting her share her burden with him "I love him, but I am not so sure anymore…I'm not sure if my love for him has change. And I'm scared of being alone again, have no one to reach out for" he was silent for a few seconds, considering carefully his reply, because she seems to be waiting for one.

"Swan, maybe it is not my place, for several reasons, but maybe it is not my place to say this…but I have to…You are a caring, loving, passionate, beautiful woman who deserves someone by her side who doesn't stood her up ever with no reason at all" she was staring at him attentively "Look, when we are young and we fall in love, we hope is going to be forever. But then we grow up, and maybe the person we are with grows up in a different direction, and things get messy. Is hard to let go, but that is the choice we have to make, to keep on fighting for it for a bit longer, or simply let go and move on"

"How do you make this choice?" she asked and Killian shrugged.

"I guess is personal, no one else can choose for you"

"If I fight for a bit longer, will things get better?"

"Statistically no, but there are always exceptions" he said trying to be honest, even when all he wanted to say was that she shouldn't be with Neal anymore.

"And you don't think Neal and I could be a part of the exception" it was not a question. Killian ran a hand trough his hair and said to himself _"here goes nothing"_

"If I was your boyfriend, I would never let you alone an entire night knowing you are waiting for me in my bed. I would never tell you to meet me somewhere and never show up, I would take care of you and love you, letting you know every single day how bloody much" He was so passionate on his speech that he didn't notice when Emma got so close to him, or if it was him the one getting closer to her "But you are not mine, and all I can say is I wish you were" he said almost in a whisper, because she was so close he could feel her breathing on his chin. He saw Emma's eyes travel to his mouth, and he almost jumped to kiss her right there, but he stopped himself. Suddenly Emma's hands where on the lapels of his jacket pulling him to her. Their mouths met in a passionate kiss, to be honest he was expecting Emma's kiss to be wonderful, but this was fireworks and passion, and raw desire. When they finally broke the kiss searching for air, his mind was turning circles in his head. He pushed their foreheads together, grasping for more seconds to have her in his arms, because he knew it was not going to be as simple as kissing and live happily ever after.


	4. Chapter 4

**Emma.**

She wanted to blame all the alcohol she drank last night, she wanted to blame her loneliness, she wanted to blame Killian for existing, she even tried to blame Neal for not showing up. But the truth is she wasn't that drunk, she was well aware of what she was doing. Yes, maybe the alcohol reduced her inhibitions a bit, but the only one to blame was herself, she wanted to kiss him because no one ever looked at her the way he was doing it, and his words, his voice, she wanted to kiss him so she did. And it was the most amazing kiss she ever had in her entire life, at least that's the way she remembers it, and now she doesn't know what to do.

What are you supposed to do when you kissed your boyfriend's roommate? As soon as she woke up, she turned off her phone, because she wanted to avoid the world today. Thankfully it was Sunday and she could take the day for herself. She was lying in bed staring at the ceiling; she closed her eyes and could see Killian's face exactly at that moment she decided she was kissing him. She touched her lips with her fingertips, hours had passed and she could still feel his lips on hers.

After that mind blowing kiss they shared, Killian pushed their foreheads together. She could feel one of his hands on her back holding her in place. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the easiness between them, for a moment, just a few seconds of holding each other, until he spoke.

"That was…" he was out of words, but those two simple words reminded her who he was, who she is, and how they are related through her boyfriend. She let his jacket go, she was still holding it tight, and broke the connection of their foreheads, he let her go. She opened her eyes and looked at his face, to her surprise he looked wrecked, and she understood then that she was not only hurting Neal with this indiscretion, she was hurting Killian too.

"I need to go" was all she could say, he nodded.

"Let me walk you all the way"

"No…" she looked into his eyes, and she knew he would walk her and not say a single word, but the one she couldn't trust was herself "We are almost there, is okay" she said quietly, but she knew he was listening.

"Walk ahead, love. But I'll let you know I will follow you from a fair distance just to be sure you got home ok. It is too late, and I wouldn't forgive myself if something happens to you" he said and she smiled because someone got this man out from a fairy tale. She nodded.

"Goodbye Killian" She walked home, feeling safe because he was there. When she got to her apartment building she turned around to look for him, and saw him walking back where they came.

Now, with her head somehow more clear, all she knows is that she needs to talk to both of them. But she still needs to decide exactly what she wants.

 **Tink.**

It was Sunday and she had planned to sleep all day long, but that wasn't going to happen, because someone was knocking insistently to her door. She tried to ignore it, until her phone started ringing, and the door was still being knocked. She stretched her arm and grabbed the phone, no surprise for the name she saw blinking on the screen. She got up from bed and walked to the door with the cell phone in her hand.

"What do you want? Go bother someone else" she said opening the door finding Killian with an amused look on his face. She walked inside, took the blanket from the armchair, threw herself on the couch, covering her body with the blanket.

"Is past noon, Love. Time to wake up" he said closing the door and then sitting in the armchair.

"I'm too happy sleeping, thank you very much" she mumbled.

"Emma kissed me" she heard him say and opened her eyes widely, putting herself instantly in a sitting position.

"What?!" she exclaimed, and then looked at him "You don't look exactly happy"

"Well... she kissed me and then said goodnight…I guess I have to wait until we can talk again, If she wants to"

"Don't look that defeated, she kissed you…I'm guessing because you said something"

"I did, but everything happened so fast. I don't know what to do now"

"You wait, be patient she has a boyfriend. So whatever happens next it won't be fast" she tried to encourage him.

"I know, I just can't stop thinking that I might go back home and find her kissing him or something and…" he shook his head trying to get rid of the image it crossed his mind.

"It could happen…So what? You are hiding here?" he gave her an innocent look and she rolled her eyes.

"Just for today. I need to figure out what to do"

"Look, whatever happens next it probably won't be soon. The one who really needs to figure out what to do is Emma, your job is to wait, be patient" she repeated trying to comfort him.

"Well, I'm a patient man I guess" he said leaning on the back of the armchair closing his eyes. At that exact moment her phone let out a beep, announcing a text message. She found it on the couch under the blanket. And she smiled when she looked at the screen.

"Don't get excited, because this could be bad news. But Emma is asking me for your phone number" she said still staring at the screen.

"What?!" Killian exclaimed "How does she have your number?"

"We exchanged phone numbers before she stared hating me because of you" she said with a smile. Emma maybe didn't hate her but she wasn't as nice as she was before she "slept" with Killian.

"Why am I hearing about this now?" He asked and Tink rolled her eyes.

"Do you want me to give her your number or not?"

"Do you need to ask?" he asked and threw a cushion to her. She started laughing.

"Be nice or I won't send the number" she threatened poorly, and gave her attention back to the phone, texting back to Emma.

Tink wasn't too optimistic things would go easy for Killian today, or the next days. But at least Emma wanted to talk. Even if the girl just wanted to close the door today for Killian, it was just a battle, not the war. Last night Emma kept staring at Killian when he was talking to someone else across the room. Even Mary Margaret pointed it out, of course she didn't know Emma was Neal's girlfriend, she only noticed what everyone else did last night, Emma and Killian like each other very much.

 **Killian.**

Emma texted him, a few minutes after asking Tink for his number, she said they need it to talk and sent him the direction to a coffee shop close to her apartment building. He knew things would look better for him if she gave it more thought to what happened last night, but he wanted to see her. So now, he walked in and spotted her easily, he walked straight to her. She saw him approaching and their eyes locked up until he was sitting in front of her.

"Hi" she whispered.

"Hi" he replied with a smile. She took a deep breath and he knew she was going to the point.

"When I woke up today, I said to myself I was not going to talk to you at any time soon. But we need to talk, because is not just about us. We kissed, and I have a boyfriend and he is your friend" His heart started jumping in his chest. She paused for a few seconds, he waited "this is not fair for you, I'm dragging you into the mess that my relationship is…I need to figure things out with Neal"

"If you don't mid me asking, what do you mean by 'figure things out with Neal'?"

"I don't know, I guess I have to face him about how terrible our relationship is now"

"Hmm" was all he could say back and looked away frowning. He hated the idea of them staying together as if nothing happened, as if their terrible relationship, as she puts it, will keep going in front of him.

"Look Killian…" she said trying to get his attention back to her, when he did she continued "I like you…if kissing you last night was not hint enough" she said softly looking into his eyes and blushed beautifully "But he's been my boyfriend for almost four years now"

"I know Swan…But you have to know I like you too, very much. I don't take our kiss lightly, you were there and that was not just a kiss…I understand your position and I can be a patient man" she smiled softly, they stare at each other for a few seconds, her eyes wandered to his mouth and he couldn't help but lick his lips.

"I should go" she said still looking into his mouth then looked back to his eyes "I was planning on shutting myself out to the world today, but I guess I made a good choice to face the consequences of last night. And to keep on that spirit, I think I'll better go talk to Neal right away" he hated the idea of sending her to someone who can openly kiss her, and probably will. But he got more than he thought he will today, so he was counting his blessings and being empathetic. Whatever he and Emma are going to become it won't happen in a day, not in this circumstances "Do you think you could give me a couple hours with Neal? I mean, I'm planning to find him at your apartment, because if I ask him to go somewhere I don't know any more if he'll show up"

"Of course, love. I'll go back home at the end of day" he assured her and she smiled.

Tink thought he would be broken hearted so, she texted him to go back to her place to have a late lunch, and that was more appealing than walking around for a couple hours. Things weren't clear yet, but at least Emma admitted she likes him, so whatever happens he could take it. He really could be a patient man, he will wait for her. The first chore the next week was finding a new apartment, he saw a couple he liked already. But he was hesitant on moving out, now he has to move out as soon as he can.

He got back to his home around 7p.m. The apartment was quiet, so no one seems to be there. He walked into the kitchen, grabbed a glass, opened the fridge and filled his glass with cold water. He was about to drink from it when a loud moan reached his ears. He froze, with the glass almost to his mouth, the noise kept going, somehow louder and louder, then he heard Neal's voice screaming "Oh yeah" and the girl kept going, he walked out of the kitchen hoping those sounds came from another apartment or some other explanation than Neal and Emma fucking in the next room. His mind conjured many horrible images of Neal and Emma naked, he wanted to punch something, he should punch himself for being so stupid, for hoping. He was frozen in the kitchen's door staring at Neal's bedroom door where the noises were coming from. He's had a lot of crap in his life but this was on the top five at least. Suddenly the girl came loud and clear, that brought him back to the present, his body unfroze and he walked straight to his bedroom, he got a bag and stared putting clothes and stuff in, he was not spending the night in this place. Someone will be kind enough to let him sleep in their couch.

He walked out his bedroom with a bag full of anything necessary to survive a couple days somewhere else. When he was walking in front of the kitchen door Neal walked out from it and they almost collided. "Hey you are in a hurry pal" said Neal with a smile, his body only covered by a towel around his waist, Killian passed a hand trough his hair.

"Yeah a bit…so have a good night" he said walking around him to get to the front door. He put a hand on the door's handle when he heard Neal's voice again.

"Ok…look man" he said trying to get Killian's attention walking closer to him, he lowered his voice "If you see Emma around you haven't seen me, ok?" Killian frowned confused. But before he could say anything a pretty skinny girl with brown complexion walked out of the kitchen with a jar of pickles on her hand.

"Babe, I can't open this" she said then she noticed Killian and her hand secured the towel that was surrounding her body "oh, hi"

"Hi" Killian repeated then looked back at the man in front of him. Neal gave him a look then winked at him, and turned his attention back to the girl.

"Babe, this is Killian, my roommate"

"Hello Killian, I'm Tamara" The girl said and Killian was on the verge of a headache, what the fuck was going on. He nodded then looked back at Neal scowling and walk out the door.

Killian left the apartment and leaned on the wall as soon as he closed the door. His was so confused right now, he was relieved that it wasn't Emma, but he wanted to kill Neal for doing this to Emma. Yes, they kind of cheated last night, but it was just a kiss and Emma was not going to do anything about it until she talks to Neal. Neal obviously had been doing this girl for quite a while. Now, every time he disappeared made sense. What a mess, he really was not sleeping on this apartment anymore; he'll pay a hotel if he has to. He already liked an apartment, so he will try to close the deal tomorrow if he can.


	5. Chapter 5

**Emma.**

She left the coffee shop where she met with Killian feeling a bit guilty, because she really wanted to kiss him again, that's why she needed to leave as soon as possible. The walk to Neal's was torture, she was so confused, she has accepted her feelings for Killian, she couldn't deny it anymore, but she still has a boyfriend, and what to do next was the real question. She guessed that whatever was gonna happen, she'll know as soon as she has Neal right in front of her. All she was certain of, was that her relationship with Neal has been dying slowly before Killian even showed up.

Lately she didn't even feel in a relationship, she was most of the time alone, their relationship was more about having sex than anything else. And it has become more obvious to her how terrible it is, when her "barely a relationship" with Killian is way better than whatever her relationship with Neal is. She doesn't even remember a time when Neal looked at her the way Killian does now, ever. And that scares her, because she really thought she had it all with Neal, and Killian with just a kiss, his gentlemanly ways, his beautiful smile, and the way he looks at her, just blew up any notion she has about love or feeling loved.

By the time she arrived she had decided the way she will approach this conversation, so she was ready. She knocked on the door, over and over again, she was insistent, and as time passed by she felt more and more pissed off. She knew he was there, she had no proof to that, but call her crazy, she felt him. But he never opened the door, so she turned around and walked away, she was so understanding of his disappearing until now, she even felt guilty because she spent a lot of time thinking about Killian. But his, this is too much. She was done feeling guilty, maybe if Neal was paying more attention to her she wouldn't be kissing his roommate, she wouldn't be thinking about said roommate more than necessary.

The next day at work she ignored Neal's calls. He called to her phone, to her job, even to her co worker Elsa. He can wait, he made her wait more than once, now is his turn. This week she was focusing at her job, no more thinking about Neal, no more thinking about Killian, no more thinking about stupid Tink sleeping with Killian, no more thinking about that stupid kiss that was the most amazing kiss of her life. No more drama, just her job. She figured out a way to keep the kids she was trying to keep together, the twins. They have a father who doesn't know they exist, maybe he'll take them in. It was a long shot but she had to try, so she focused on that and only that.

 **Killian.**

Tink helped Killian move his things out from Neal's apartment. She has been letting him sleep on her couch the last few days, he finally decided for an apartment, so he was moving to a beautiful and spacious loft, with a beautiful view of the river, actually a very expensive one. Killian inherited from his brother a small shipping company. After Liam's death he moved out from the UK to Boston, he went as far as he could, so he applied to Boston University and several others, he was accepted here, so that's how he found himself studying at Boston University. He got a business degree and was slowly making his brother's small company into something quite impressive, he still has many goals to achieve with his company, but he is in a good track. So, he is not low on cash. He was supposed to live with Neal for a month or two, as long as it took him to find a decent place to live, but his thing for Emma kept him there more than he planned at first.

He had to buy a lot of things and furniture to fill his loft, so now they were surrounded by boxes and the place was a complete mess. Tink, David and Mary Margaret offered to help, so now the four of them are trying to make sense to the chaos. Killian and David were trying to assemble the black Tv Unit, which was more simple said than done, while David read once more the instructions, Killian was looking at the pieces with concentration. Tink and Mary Margaret were at the kitchen, putting things in drawers and taking kitchen appliances out of the boxes, chatting happily about whatever.

Suddenly all Killian concentration was broken by the mention of Emma's name, so he started paying attention to Mary Margaret's story. Apparently she and Emma have been talking, she even went to her office. Tink gave him a knowing look when Mary Margaret wasn't paying attention, he tried to look nonchalant even when he was certain Tink knew he was listening intently. She even asked Emma if she was coming today to help him move, and his heart started pounding on his chest. Emma told her she couldn't because she was going on a short job trip.

Oh, he wanted to call her, every god damn day, but he knew she need it time. He was not giving up on her, he was just giving her a few days to sort things out by herself, he planned to text her tomorrow if she haven't done it then, text her casually and let her know that whatever happens he is still her friend. But now all he wanted to do was take his phone out and call her. He refrained anyway, because it was not the time to do it. He needs to be alone to do that.

Mary Margaret and David left when it got dark, he was officially moved in and they were all tired. It took only a day, he didn't have that many things yet. Tink went out of the bathroom and looked at him sitting on the couch with a smile.

"So? Are you going to call her?" she asked approaching, and then she sat on the armchair in front of him. He smiled looking down.

"Are you a mind reader now?"

"No, I'm not. But I do know you've been dying to call her, and hearing her name is trigger enough to push you into action" she yawned.

"Should I? I mean, I want to give her space. I don't even know what happen with Neal but…what if they stayed together?" he asked a hand combing nervously his hair. Tink took a big breath and let the air go.

"I don't know what happened between them, but when we went to Neal's apartment, to pick up your stuff, he asked me if I have seen Emma…he tried to sound casual but he looked nervous or something" she said contemplative. Killian looked out the window "I'm gonna go" she said standing up, she took Killian's phone from the coffee table and put it on his hands when she kissed his cheek goodnight "call her".

Killian looked at his phone intently he had many excuses on his mind not to call Emma. But the real reason he has been avoiding it is because he couldn't hide from her what he witnessed that night, but at the same time he didn't feel as the appropriate person to say something, he doesn't think it would look good if he said something like "hey pick me, because your boyfriend is cheating on you, I'm better than him" he wouldn't use those words but whatever he says it would sound like that to her ears.

He sighed, he couldn't resist it anymore. Emma calls to him like a siren, and he is going to drown with her if she lets him. He looked for her name on the contacts list and made the call. The phone ringed once, twice, his heart started drumming on his chest, at the third ring he heard her voice.

"Hello, stranger" she said casually, and he couldn't help but smile.

"Hello, Swan. How are you?"

"Mmmm…" she sighed "I'm fine, thank you. How are you? A little bird told me you moved"

"I'm good, a bit tired because yes, I moved. We all finished moving me in a few minutes ago"

"We?" she asked and he heard the curiosity.

"Ahmm, Mary Margaret, David, Tink and I"

"Hmmm" she said when she heard Tink's name and Killian rolled his eyes, he was going to kill Tink. She is his best friend and now the woman he wants to be with dislikes her because Tink had the brilliant idea of making Emma believe they slept together. Bloody fantastic.

"I heard you are traveling" he said trying to change the subject.

"So my little bird travels both ways" he could hear the smile on her voice "I'm in a small town in Maine right now. I'm doing some work over here, I'll probably be back in a couple days"

"I would love to see you" he said and Emma remained silent for a few seconds, too long for his taste.

"I haven't talk to Neal yet" she blurted out. He felt disappointed, so she is still seeing Neal after all. And Neal is cheating on her, and he doesn't know how to say it without sounding like a petty jealous man.

"I see" is all he managed to say, the line was silent for a few more seconds before he added "We are still friends…we can…"

"Killian…that's not what I meant. I'm not with him, the last time I saw him was before your birthday. But I haven't talk to him and I do want to see you too…I just…I can't even consider seeing you before I talk to him" Killian's hope rose again.

"I understand"

"I call you when I sort things out, Ok?"

"Yes"

"Thank you for calling, I was thinking of you" she said loud enough for him to hear.

"I am always thinking of you, Emma" he listened how she took a long breath, and he smiled.

"Good night" she said finally.

"Good night, love" he said and she finished the call. He lay back on the couch, his decision was made, this secret he was keeping it didn't belong to him. He'll give Neal one chance to be honest.

The next day he was standing in front of Neal's apartment. He knocked on the door and his former roommate opened the door. Neal frowned.

"What do you want?" he asked impolitely.

"We need to talk"

"You sound like a woman now, come in" Neal stepped aside to let him in "You told her, didn't you?"

"Tell who what?" Killian asked scowling.

"You told Emma I'm cheating" Neal said and Killian laughed dryly

"As a matter of fact, I came here to ask you politely to tell her the next time you see her" he said and smiled sarcastically. This time Neal was the one laughing.

"Who are you to tell me what to do?"

"If you won't I will, I'm giving you a chance to be honest" Neal stared at him for a few seconds.

"Oh, I know what this is…So, Is she leaving me for you? Is she staying with you? Did you fuck her already?" Neal's voice was increasing by the word and Killian rolled his eyes, this man had no logic on his brain.

"I'm not even going to try and answer those stupid questions"

"Do you think I'm stupid? Do you seriously think I don't know you are into her? I just thought she was more reliable" the man said stepping closer to Killian.

"Be careful with your words" Killian threatened gritting his teeth. Neal took a step back.

"I won't tell her anything, I'll get her back just to mess things up for you"

"Do whatever you want. But know you have one chance to say it yourself. Wait for her call, meet her, talk to her and tell her. Because after that conversation is over it'll be my turn and I'll say what you won't" Killian started walking to the door.

"What do I gain by telling her? The way you put it, it might be easier to let you do it" Neal pointed out.

"She has a choice to make. Make things clearer for her" he said looking directly at Neal's eyes and walked out the door.


	6. Chapter 6

**Emma.**

She has no words to describe how she feels right now, she's been walking around without a destination. Her head was a complete mess trying to understand how she didn't notice her boyfriend cheating on her. She met Neal to talk when she returned from Maine, she thought they were going to have an adult conversation about how they have taken different paths down the road of their relationship, and how mature it was going to be to mutually decide a separation was the best for the both of them. But that was not the way their meeting went.

Neal looked pissed since the moment he opened the door to his apartment, she quickly noticed a box with the few things she had in this place. And Neal received her with accusations of her sleeping with Killian, of her breaking their friendship, she was confused at first, she just let him talk, and when he finally let all out she asked calmly but not feeling calm.

"What are you talking about? Where did you get all this crap you are accusing me of?"

"Killian" he answered immediately. But you see, she has this thing she calls a superpower, she knows when someone is lying. Especially someone she knows as well as she knows Neal. And Neal was lying.

"Are you telling me Killian told you I slept with him?" she asked frowning. Neal looked at her trying to say something but failing, he remembered her superpower, she was sure "Did he implied it somehow?" she asked again.

"That's not the point we are discussing here" he managed to say.

"Oh, it is… Because I need to know who told you I slept with someone I haven't slept with" she screamed frustrated.

"That doesn't matter anymore, because you can run to your precious Killian and do whatever the fuck you want with him. I trusted him…" Neal looked hurt when he said the last three words, and Emma felt bad because even when she hasn't slept with Killian, she kissed him and wants to do it again. Then Neal spoke again "Good thing I was cheating on you too" that felt as terrible as a slap right on the face. Emma's eyes widen in surprise, Neal gave her a smirk "Didn't he tell you? Because he knew about it, he met her and all" and those were the words that hurt the most.

She doesn't remember much after that, she knows she walked out the door, and now she is walking and walking, and she doesn't think she can stop.

 **Killian.**

He's been distracted to say the least, he doesn't know when is Emma coming back, but she must be back already. He didn't call her again, there was not much to say until she talks to Neal, and he is willing to go at her pace. He got back home from work later than he is used to, because he's been using his free time to worry so he is occupying his time as much as he can. He walked to the big window of his loft trying to find peace on the view of the river, as much as he can see of it in the dark. His meditation was broken when his phone started ringing, he'd let it ring but it could be Emma, so he walked back to the kitchen isle to get it. He couldn't help but smile when he saw Emma's name on the screen.

"Swan?" he asked smiling.

"You are a liar" she sounded weird.

"Emma? What are you talking about?" he frowned.

"You just wanted to have fun with the poor girl that was being cheated by her boyfriend" her words where confusing and he recognized the weirdness in her voice.

"Are you drunk? Where are you?"

"I'm not drunk…I've been drinking, there's a difference" Killian went for his keys and started walking out his apartment.

"Ok Swan, where have you been drinking?" he asked trying to sound calmer than he was

"I don't know…hey! Don't change the subject, you are a jerk, the same kind of jerk as Neal is" she said sounding more sad than angry.

"Right … What about I come over wherever you are, and you tell me that and anything else you want right to my face, I'll let you punch me and everything" he bargained.

"I would love to do that, punch you that is"

"Good we agree, now tell me where you are so you can punch me. Are you home?" he was reaching his car already looking for the keys to open the door. Listening intently to the background sounds, there was music, not to loud, and people were talking.

"No, I'm not home…I don't know where I am" she said sounding confused, and Killian cursed under his breath now it was more pressing to find her, she was drink and alone somewhere unknown.

"Ok… Can you describe me the place? The name of a street, the bar you are in, something please…ask someone if you have to" he pleaded then turned on the ignition of his car.

"Ummm… you are really eager to get punched on the face" she joked.

"You don't even know…please love, help me out. Ask the bartender what's the name of the bar" he listened as she tried to get the attention of someone, and he heard loud and clear when the guy said 'The Rabbit Hole' Emma repeated the information. He put the call on speaker, because he rather keep Emma on the line, googled the name of the bar and got the address, he was silently thanking the ability the phones now have to keep a conversation on while you do anything else on it.

It took him around 20 minutes to get to her, he was driving really fast, especially when Emma's phone ran out of battery. But before it did he instructed her to give the phone to the bartender because he wanted to talk to him, he wouldn't trust his Emma to anyone but he rather let someone know he was coming, he asked the guy to not let her go anywhere, he'll tip him appropriately. As soon as he arrived he jumped out of his car and almost ran to the door of the bar, it was definitely not a place for Emma, he wouldn't pick this bar to drink himself, and it was very far away from her home. There were a bunch of guys that looked more like bikers. And thankfully Emma was sitting on the bar talking to the bartender. The guy looked at him approaching.

"Are you Killian? Is this Killian?" he asked him first then to Emma. She turned around.

"Yes he is" she said looking straight to his eyes. He came closer and put a rebel lock of her hair behind her ear.

"I found you" he said with a smile, she smiled at first then her face became sad and hugged him. He held her tight "Do you want to go home?" she nodded still pressed to his chest. He looked over her shoulder and gave a look to the bartender "Did you pay your tab, love?"

"I don't know where my purse is" she opened her eyes widely.

"That's alright, love. We'll find it" the bartender put her purse on the bar "Look, we found it already" he said with a smile, she turned around and grabbed it to her chest tightly "Now, sit here. Please don't move. I'll talk with this fine lad"

He took care of her tab, and gave an extra hundred to the bartender for his help. The man explained he put the purse behind the bar because Emma was walking around and left it everywhere unattended. When he was done he grabbed Emma's hand and directed her outside to his car, he opened the door for here and closed it when she was sited inside. Run around the car and sat inside, he helped her put the seat belt on, and he noticed she was staring at him closely.

"If you still want to punch me you should do it now, it wouldn't be good for the both of us if you do it while I'm driving" he teased.

"Do you know why I wanted to punch you?" she asked.

"Not really, but I'm so happy I found you that I'll let you punch me anyway. We kind of agreed on that, I'm a man of my word" she smiled softly.

"I'll punch you tomorrow" she said looking straight ahead to the street. He smiled.

"I'll love to see you tomorrow too, Swan" he saw how she smiled wider but still avoided looking at him.

When he pulled over the car in front of her apartment building it was midnight, and she was fast asleep or more like passed out. He tried to wake her up, but all he got were mumbled words. He took her purse and searched for her keys, asking himself again 'why women carry around so many things in their purses?' He didn't find any key at all. She was wearing very tight jeans so he didn't think she was carrying keys on her pants, he searched the pockets of her jacket, but nothing. He looked at her and started talking.

"Ok ,Swan. You'll spend the night at my place" he turned on the car again and started driving "This is more like kidnapping you but I have no choice, I'm not leaving you on the sidewalk" he chuckled, he felt silly kind of talking to himself right now. But the idea of Emma sleeping at his place, made him happy. Even when probably tomorrow morning it is not going to be so pleasant, he remembers Emma's words from earlier, Neal said something vile about him, and the punch she offered is still a possibility.


	7. Chapter 7

**Killian.**

When he was driving from Emma's to his place he thought that things were going to be interesting in the morning, even if she is mad for something Neal said, just the thought of her sleeping on his bed made him smile. But he was not counting on what actually happened during the night, because he never thought that Emma Swan trying to seduce him was going to be something he'll try to pass up. What a difficult night.

He got home and carried her all the way to his loft, not an easy task because apparently she was trying to torture him, she started cuddling to his neck, smelling him and making little noises that were slowly driving him crazy. He managed to get to the loft.

Opening the door was easier said than done, but in the end he found himself laying his beautiful Swan carefully on his bed. Then she kept her torture on him when she refused to let go, her arms where stuck around his neck, and she was so close, her lips where right there. He tried to focus and tried to pull her arms away, but she grumbled and pulled him closer. He decided to let her pull him, so he climbed on the bed trying not to fall on top of her. His plan was to let her pull him then she'll probably lose her arms and he'll be free, but of course that was not what happened because his sleeping Swan put an arm around his waist and the other one was on his hair. He lay still waiting for her to fall deeper to sleep. He tried to move again, he was more than amused by now, he'd love to just fall asleep on her arms but he is a gentleman after all, and he rather do it when she made a conscious decision to do so. He was finally free, sitting on the other side of the bed and apparently he wasn't as smooth as he thought freeing himself because he heard her voice.

"Killian?"

"So you are alive after all" he said looking at her with a smile.

"Where are we?" she said looking around.

"Oh…this is my new home" then her eyes were on him, for a few seconds everything was quiet.

"Neal cheats on me" she said and her expression was so hopeless.

"I'm so sorry…I am" she didn't say anything but was still staring at him, so he wanted to ease the mood "I see your found revenge on your booze. Would you like a glass of water?" she smiled softly and nodded. He got up and walked to the kitchen, grabbed a glass, filled it with water and walked back to the bedroom. She was not in it when he walked in, the bathroom door was closed, a few seconds later the bathroom opened and she walked out with bared legs. He was sitting speechless on the edge of the bed, and she walked towards him to stand between his legs.

"You can help me find a better revenge" she said combing his hair with her fingers. He could only describe her voice as pure sin, so he closed his eyes enjoying the feeling.

"Uhmm…Emma, love" he said opening his eyes trying to stay focus, this was a very drunk version of the Emma he knows and he was not going to take advantage of that. He got up to stare into her eyes "I swear I never thought I'll be refusing you. You have to know I want you and I can't wait for that moment when I can do something more than just kiss you. But when that happens it won't be about Neal or anyone else but just the two of us" she was looking intently into his eyes, suddenly she looked sick.

"I don't feel good" she managed to say, then she put a hand to her mouth and he moved quickly. There was a paper bin by the window, next to a desk. He ran, took it and put it in front of her. She grabbed it holding it to her chest then she started throwing up. He noticed her legs going week so he guided her to the edge of the bed to sit down. He held her hair the best he could, when she seemed to stop he went to the bathroom, and brought back a wet cloth. She was asleep in the position he left her, sitting holding the paper bin. He carefully took the bin and helped her lay down on the bed. He used the wet cloth to clean her face, and any lock of hair that got dirty. When he was passing it on her forehead she opened her eyes a bit and said "I'm pathetic" he frowned.

"The only pathetic person here is your boyfriend. You are brilliant and beautiful" she closed her eyes again.

"My ex boyfriend" she mumbled correcting him. And then she was out.

He considered going to sleep on the couch, but to wake up to not find her in bed seemed terrible. She didn't look like she would get up from bed in a few hours, but the idea of trying to find her again, because apparently she was hurting enough today to think straight, the idea of her walking around was terrifying. So he decided the bed was fine, there was enough space for the both of them.

He laid down carefully, and fell asleep staring at her, he woke up to her snuggling to him, he arranged himself to hold her; then she was kissing his throat , her hand was moving south, he tried to talk to her but she was asleep, he held her hand, his heart was pounding crazily inside his chest. He made a sudden move, rolling her to her side of the bed and getting up at the same time. This woman was trying to kill him, there is much he can resist, but he is but a hot-blooded man. She just turned around and fell deeper to sleep again. He watched her sleep for a few seconds not knowing exactly what to do. Then he found it, the solution to his problem was right there in front of him.

 **Emma.**

She woke up with a familiar smell surrounding her, a smell that made her smile, she took a deep breath getting a big sniff of the pillow smiling. Her brain started to wake up and associated the smell to Killian, so she opened her eyes wide and quickly, regretting it a second later when a headache took her over. She looked around, she's never been in this bedroom before, then she got this memory from last night, she was standing between Killian's legs, he was sitting on the edge of this same bed, and for some reason she was not wearing pants. Her hands reached for her legs under the cover and found them naked, she almost freaked out until she noticed she was still wearing her underwear.

She remembers Killian going for her to the bar she found herself in, she walked and walked, without even focusing where she was going, lost in her thoughts, when she saw that bar a sudden need for alcohol made her walk in. She drank shot after shot of tequila for a while, then she settled for rum. She's been drinking rum since she met Killian, and somehow it made her feel better last night. She noticed that next to her on the center of the bed there was a sort of wall made of pillows and cushions.

"So, she lives" she heard Killian's voice, when she turned she found him with a soft smile on his face, standing by the door.

"What is this?" she asked pointing to the pillows that divided the bed. Killian chuckled, and walked closer.

"Well is a wall…of sorts" he answered,

"Ok…why is there a wall of pillows next to me?" she tried again, to be honest she was trying to delay any real talk.

"Well, last night you were a bit…umm…how to put it? Well you try to jump me a few times" he said with a smirk on his face, obviously amused. She felt all the blood on her body going to her cheeks "To be honest I am flattered. But I don't do drunk or unconscious…So I'm sure we can try that another time"

"You made the wall to protect yourself?" she asked totally and completely embarrassed ignoring his innuendos, and then covered her face with one of the pillows from the pile. She felt how the bed sank under the weight of Killian, he pulled the pillow enough to see her eyes.

"It was more to protect you…I'm just a simple man, love. I considered going to the couch, but your actions were so random that I was afraid I'll wake up to not find you here"

"I'm sorry" she said quietly, he gave her a soft smile.

"Nothing to be sorry about…I'm sure you'll love to take a bath. I left a towel, clothes, and toothbrush; everything you'll might need to feel more like a human again. I'll wait for you in the kitchen, where there is a really greasy and tasty breakfast waiting for you. Ok?" she only nodded; he nodded back and then walked out of the bedroom. They had things to talk about, but feeling like a human again sounded amazing.

After taking a long bath, brushing her teeth, she dressed with the t-shirt and hoodie Killian left for her, she put her own pants back, they were perfectly folded next to his clothes, she blushed again, because she remembers now the moment she decided in her drunken condition that seducing Killian it could be fun, she was hurting and she wanted to forget about it. Of course she knows now in her conscious condition that plan was not fair. She walked out of the bedroom, after taking a big breath trying to compose herself. Killian's loft was amazing, it looked expensive, gigantic windows cover all the walls facing the river, now that she thinks about it maybe the bedroom also has this view, because there are big curtains covering what it must be a very big window. There were not much furniture, but the whole vibe of the place screamed Killian Jones all around,

She followed the smell of bacon, and her stomach grumbled. Killian was sitting on a stool next to the kitchen isle reading a newspaper. He stopped reading and looked smiling when he saw her "Hungry?"

"Very" she answered feeling awkward, she never tried to rape a man before, so yes she was struggling to feel more confident right now. Ok maybe 'rape' was a strong word, but she was being hard with herself right now, thanking god Killian found her or she'll be waking up to a stranger who would have taken advantage of her stupidity.

"Good…I know that when I am hangover I want to eat greasy food, so I made a good bunch of bacon" he said getting up, walking around the isle to take a plate putting it next to the one he had already out for her to eat. She sat on a stool, there was a plate with cutlery and a glass. When she looked up again he had put toasts, juice, coffee and a few other things in front of her "I tried to wait for you, but you overslept and I was hungry, sorry" he apologized.

"That's fine" she said quietly, she was struggling still with her confidence. Then Killian excused himself to take a bath, giving her space to have her breakfast and to think, compose herself. They still have things to talk about, Neal accused him of a few things yesterday, some she knows were false but others she doesn't know.

Emma cleaned the dishes and organized the kitchen waiting nervously for Killian, but feeling more confident as time went by. When he walked in the living room she was sitting in the couch reading the book she gave him for his birthday, she found it in the coffee table. Killian sat on the armchair in front of her, and went straight to the point.

"You called me a liar yesterday, Why?" he was serious, and she liked it. He was taking seriously this conversation.

"Did you tell Neal we slept together?" Killians snorted and frown at the same time.

"He really said that?" he asked with disbelief in his tone. She nodded "You didn't believe him anyway, why did you called me a liar then?"

"How do you know I didn't believe him?" she asked frowning, and he gave her a soft smile.

"That was a really severe accusation, and you are not really concerned about it" Emma nodded again, Killian is a perceptive man.

"He told me he's been cheating on me…at first I didn't know what to think, we sort of cheated on him when we kissed, right? I was confused, but then he told me you've met this girl…you…you knew about it all along" Killian clenched his jaw and shook his head slowly, but she kept talking "I know our relationship…our friendship is not a common one, because we are attracted to each other, but I still considered you my friend…you should have told me, but you didn't. You lied about that, and then you could have lied about anything else".

"Mmmm…" he said after a few seconds "So you decided to trust the man who accused me of saying we slept together, when you know that's not true?"

"Then tell me. Have you met this girl? Did you know he was cheating?" she asked defiantly. She knew the answer before he even put it to words, until now he was tense, now his body deflated and he was looking for the right words on his head. She could easily read his body language.

"He introduced her to me, but I didn't even exchange a word with her as I recall. So saying I met her is going too far"

"Are you seriously excusing yourself?" she asked angrily, she was in square one again. This is what sent her to a drunken state last night. And even then she hoped Neal was lying about it too.

"Of course not. I'm trying to explain and not succeeding, apparently" He said and Emma stood up grabbed her purse, she put it earlier on top of the coffee table, and started walking to the door "What are you doing?" he asked stupidly

"I'm leaving" she replied without even looking at him.

"Ok, you want to hear the story of how I found out your boyfriend was cheating on you? Fine…" Emma didn't turn around to face him, but stopped walking "The afternoon we met in the coffee shop, the day after we kissed. You told me to wait a few hours to get back home so you could talk to Neal. So I did, I waited and when I got back home I could hear you fucking him in his bedroom…" Emma turned around surprised and looked into his eyes, he looked really hurt to the idea of walking to find her with Neal "That was the last night I spent there, I went to my bedroom and took as much as I could, hoping to never see the two of you never again. When I walked out with a bag I ran into Neal on the living room and this woman walked out of the kitchen, and it was not you…" Emma frowned, he found out by accident, she kind of thought he knew about it and was friend to this other girl too or something as grim as that. But still he didn't tell her "He asked me not to say anything…"

"So you didn't" she completed.

"I wanted to, but I didn't know how…I asked him to tell you himself"

"Well, he did" she turned around, she wanted to walk away from him. She needs to think, and the headache is back. She paused at the door when she heard his voice.

"Emma don't go like this, please" she sighed thinking what to do, she didn't want to have this conversation anymore, but she couldn't stay and pretend everything is fine "Ok, if you need to go…let me drive you to your car" he sounded defeated.

"Is ok, I'll take a cab…I need to get away from him, from you, from all this crap" she opened the door walked out, and closed it without looking back.


	8. Chapter 8

**Killian.**

Three weeks without seeing or talking to Emma, and not for lack of trying. She was not picking up her phone, didn't answer any of his texts, and he wanted to go to her apartment more than once, but talked himself out of it. She needs time, and he is not going to be the guy who stalked her when she was obviously hurting.

Tink gave him fantastic news a couple days ago, she was talking to Mary Margaret about David's birthday, and the other woman told her Emma was invited and confirmed her attendance. He was excited, she knows he would be there so she might be ok with seeing him again, and that is tonight. So here he is parking his car in front of David's house. Emma's car was nowhere to be seen so, she hasn't arrived yet

"Hello, welcome to our home" said Mary Margaret with a huge smile as soon as she opened the door and saw him.

"Milady" he said bowing lightly and Mary Margaret chuckle.

"You don't change…come in" she said and he gave her the bottle of wine he brought with a huge smile on his face. To be honest he was really happy to see Emma tonight.

David and Mary Margaret live in a big pretty house, the kind of house he would love to own when he starts his own family. He loved coming to this place, When he was about to enter the living room Tink collided with him, grabbed him hard by one arm and pulled him back to the foyer. He was confused but let her pulled him.

"You don't want to come in there" she whispered. He frowned.

"Why?" she looked at him with pity in her eyes and he knew this has something to do with Emma, was Neal here with her?

"Emma's here with someone" she whispered but he heard it as if she screamed it to him. It is hard to put into words what he felt right there, it's been 3 weeks, three fucking weeks. How could she be with someone already? Why is this someone not him?

"What do you mean exactly? Because… uughh" he really wanted to punch the wall.

"Ok, I don't know if they are friends but they look kind of close…I just thought you shouldn't go in there without a warning"

"Hey, what are you doing in here?" they heard Mary Margaret's voice "Are you guys…together?" she asked and Killian noticed how close he was to Tink, they were whispering to each other, so yes, maybe if you walk into them they might look like lovers. So Killian jumped a step aside tried to smiled and turned to look at his friend, but his eyes didn't find Mary Margaret's eyes, his eyes got stuck on Emma's as soon as he turned, she was frowning slightly.

"Of course we are not" said Tink with her musical voice "We were…ahmmm…" she was trying to find something to say but was lost.

"That's ok, we were going to the kitchen" said Emma while her eyes traveled from Killian's to Tink's, looking at the girl defiantly while she spoke with a really glazy voice. Fuck, so apparently everything that could go wrong tonight will. Mary Margaret looked confused by the tense energy in the air and walked passed them with Emma.

"Woaw, if looks could kill I'll be agonizing in the floor right now" TInk spoke and Killian rolled his eyes "Lets join the party, the only guy you don't know in there that's her…plus one? He looks a lot like you"

"What?" he asked turning to her.

"Well, he walked in with a leather jacket, and he has a stubble and dark hair, pale skin…blue eyes"

"Bloody Fantastic" was the only thing he said walking into the living room.

Well he wouldn't say the guy looks like him. August is his name, but he understands why Tink compared them. Tink stayed next to him all the time, because she knows him better than anyone here. He has a terrible temper, and he will throw a drink 'accidentally' on this guy if she doesn't stop him. The anguish started when Emma returned with Mary Margaret carrying snacks, then she sat next to this guy who was definitely too familiar with her. He hated every single second of this birthday party. The worst part of all was when this guy said something to her that she found funny, Emma laughed hard and grabbed the guys knee trying to find ground, the man only smiled looking amused at her laughing. There are things you as a man can stand and others you don't. You can deal with another man flirting to your girl if she is not interested, you can stand with another man talking to her, standing too close, telling her a story, but making your girl laugh…oh, that was an offense almost as terrible as kissing her.

Damn, he drank the rest of his rum and walked out to the garden, Tink didn't follow. This was worse than watching her with Neal, Neal never paid real attention to her, this man was listening to her when she talked, whispered things to her and making her laugh, this was killing him. The thing is, he was up to the challenged, if he has to spend an entire night watching her bond with another man he'll do it. Because he was dumb enough to think he will keep an eye on her as long as he could, and he swears if this man tries to kiss her right in front of him he will punch him hard, no matter the consequences, he won't allow it.

"Are you ok?" he heard David's voice and turned around.

"Perfect" he answered sarcastically and David chuckled.

"I know we haven't talk about her yet, but as soon as I saw her walk in with another man I figured you wouldn't enjoy it"

"Am I that obvious?" he asked with a smile.

"Well I've never seen you look at someone the way you look at her, for what is worth I think is mutual" David said sitting on a close bench, Killian followed him.

"I thought that too, now I'm not so sure"

"She introduced him as her friend" Killian looked at David.

"Well mate, she used to introduce me as her friend too. So, that doesn't make me feel any better"

"Killian…" he heard her call his name, he closed his eyes for a second enjoying the way his name sounded on her lips. Then he looked up.

"Ok, I'm going to keep entertaining my other guests" Said David standing up and walking away.

 **Emma.**

Maybe she was being unfair to Killian, but she needs that whatever is going on between them happens when there is no trace of Neal's crap around them. When she thought things with a clear head she understood the reason for Killian to hold the information, Neal put him in a difficult position and he did as best as he could, she even had disappeared for that week so how could he tell her. Around the fourth time he called she wanted to answer but she found herself staring at her phone unable to move until the call ended, and she found herself re reading his texts over and over again, she even tried to text him back, but she found herself erasing everything she wrote until she convinced herself it was a bad idea.

She needs time, her relationship of almost 4 years had ended in chaos. She knows her feelings for Neal are not the same as before, but she was hurting anyway, she felt betrayed and confused, because how could she blame him, she was planning on breaking up with him and hopefully have a relationship with his friend, so who's to blame. She was aware Neal is a jerk, who cheated on her probably even before Killian arrived to Boston, because before that he was acting distant, so it was very confusing to be her right now.

She said to herself "Killian will stop calling eventually. He'll be better without me" But he tried every day for three weeks and she was kind of expecting his calls even when she didn't answer, the days he called her at night were the worst, because she spent all day long thinking he already got tired, then he called at night and she kept on the hope they could work when things got better.

Mary Margaret became a ray of light in the darkness, the closer she ever had to a friend was Elsa, her coworker and she kept their friendship at work even when Elsa tried to push their friendship beyond the walls of their office, she never wanted to do it. But then Mary Margaret came to her office one day and befriended Elsa too, and the three of them started taking lunches together, and making plans for girls night out, or shopping dates, and to be honest all of these things she never did with any friend she was enjoying it. Mary Margaret invited them to David's birthday, Elsa couldn't make it but she could and she wanted to, she was dying to see Killian. To see him like this could be the end of all Neal's crap between them, and a beginning for their friendship or relationship or whatever they are that she couldn't find a proper name for.

But one night before David's birthday something amazing happened, there was a knock on her door and when she looked through the peek hole she couldn't believe her eyes, August was standing on the other side of her door. She gave and exited scream, opened the door and threw herself into his arms. The two of them were laughing until she separated from the hug and punched him on the face.

"That's for disappearing for almost two years"

"Dammit woman, next time I won't even bother showing up" he joked walking inside her apartment, the bag he was carrying was left on the floor next to the door.

"Yes you will, because then you'll miss me punching your face" she said closing the door "Why didn't you say you were back"

"Well I did tell you last time we saw each other that you'll see me when you broke up with the jerk…so here I am to celebrate that" August called a week ago and she told him about the break up, he did call once in a while, sometimes months go by without knowing about him. She and August knew each other from their foster home's days, he was a brother of sorts. But he was not something she could call a constant, he became a published writer and spent all of his time traveling around the world, but even when he disappeared for months at a time he was family, and their friendship always remained untouched by time or distance. He disapproved of Neal since the beginning but in the end Neal was the one who was around so she didn't listen to the guy who was in town for a few days every 3 to 5 five months.

"From where are you coming from?"

"Phucket…Is beautiful there, you should go someday"

"I wish I had your time or your wallet" she joked.

"Maybe I should take you on an adventure one of these days. Please let me know when you have vacation days" he said lying on the couch.

"Be careful, I might take you up on that" she teased.

"Actually I'm being serious, for old time's sake…I have to take advantage that you are single now, soon some sucker will fall for your rudeness and we won't be able to travel"

"Ha ha" she said sarcastically "Where are you staying?" she asked and August looked around.

"This couch is comfortable enough" he said and Emma rolled her eyes.

"Is there enough space for me there?" she asked pouting and he moved a little and palmed the space next to him. She lied down next to him and hugged his body, her face stamped at his chest. August rested his chin on top of her head and secured his arms around her.

"I swear I'm gonna kill that fucker" he said and Emma giggled a little "So you better don't stop me if we ran into him and I punch him repeatedly".

"If that happens I'll be stopping you to give me a chance to punch him myself".

"That's my girl" they laid there in silence holding each other. Emma didn't know how much she missed August until he was finally here stepping in and acting as protective as he used to, and she didn't know how she needed to be held like this until this very moment and she cried, for the first time she cried. August did exactly what she needed him to do, he held her tight, caressed her hair and whispered words of encouragement in her ears. A few minutes later, as soon as she could take a big breath she asked "Did you come all the way here from Phucket just for me?" August let a huge sight out.

"Well I've been thinking of coming back, but when you told me what your prince charming did, I had to come. I know you Emma Swan, I'm sure this is the first time you cry since the whole thing happened"

"And I think the last time"

"What do you say about going out Friday night?" he asked. Emma sat down

"Tomorrow night?" she asked well aware that he might be a bit jet lagged and was lost in the calendar "I have a dinner party" one of August's eyebrows went up and Emma laughed "I have friends now"

"I'm impressed. I need to meet this legendary people whom you let into your life" he said with a big smile.

"Well you might be able to do so. Come with me?" she asked with a big smile on her face.

"Well I have no plans. Why not?... Seriously, how did you meet this people?" Emma rolled her eyes.

"They are the best friends of a…friend" she hesitated in the last word so August frowned suspiciously.

"A male friend?" he asked and Emma nodded "Oh gosh, I've got to start hating some other fucker this soon" he exclaimed dramatically and Emma laughed.

"You don't have to hate him" she said getting up, grabbing a cushion and throwing it to his face. He laughed loudly.

"Can I punch him from the start? That will save us time" he asked sitting up.

"I rather you don't…he has a pretty face, can we keep it that way?" she asked happily, August brings out the little girl inside of her, and she enjoys it.

"Oh damn, this is worst than I thought" he said dramatically again "I'll restrain from hurting his pretty face just as long as he keeps making you smile like that"

So it was settled, she will go with August to David's birthday, he'll give her the confidence she was lacking right now. So she thought it was a really good idea, by then she couldn't know how wrong she was.


	9. Chapter 9

**Emma.**

They arrived at David's birthday dinner party right on time. August drove them in the car he was renting, because he refuses to go anywhere in the dead machine that Emma's bug was to him. But Emma knows the truth, what he really wanted was to drive the beautiful sport car he rented. Mary Margaret received them with a pretty smile on her face, Will and Belle were already there, and a girl name Ruby. Tink and Killian weren't there yet, and she was dreading seeing them coming in together, as things are right now Tink has more of a relationship with him than her, all she's been doing is push him away over and over again. She couldn't blame him if he resumed his 'friends with benefit' thing with Tink.

August was having a conversation with David about his traveling, describing Phucket in a very poetic way when the doorbell rang, Emma's heart started pounding on her chest frantically and she heard Tink's voice greeting Mary Margaret, she got even more nervous. In the end, Tink walked in alone and Emma felt relieved. Rationally she knew that it didn't make a difference, Killian and Tink could have walked in together just as friends, or could have walked in there apart and be totally together.

A few minutes later the doorbell rang again and this time it was Killian, she just knew it. She saw Mary Margaret walking back to the living room followed by Killian, but Tink jumped on him, and pulled him back out of the room. She didn't know what to think or to do. Then she heard Mary Margaret saying she was going to the kitchen for snacks, so she offered her help in an impulse. The both of them walked out of the room into the foyer, intending to cross it to go into the kitchen, but they found there Killian and Tink whispering very close to each other, and Mary Margaret looked surprised.

"Hey, what are you doing here? Are you guys…together?" with the last question Mary Margaret looked at her confused, and Emma said mentally 'Yeah _I thought he was interested in me too'_ , Killian jumped aside by Mary Margaret's questions and looked surprised to find her standing there, their eyes met.

"Of course we are not" Tink replied smiling and Emma's eyes traveled towards the girl.

"That's ok, we were going to the kitchen" she said coldly and walked pass them.

Emma was wondering when she became a jealous kind of girl, it was a feeling she was not familiar with. Maybe it was Neal's cheating or maybe there was something Killian Jones awoke in her. Maybe it has nothing to do with being jealous in general, maybe is about Tink, the girl she knows has slept with Killian. Even when Emma never saw Tink being territorial with Killian or anything at all, she felt jealous, she wanted to grab Killian's arm and pull him away from the girl. The reason she was not doing it was because Killian seemed upset, he was frowning and barely looking at her, he sat as far away from her as he apparently could, and the stupid Tink was always next to him.

August noticed her distress immediately, and to make her laugh became his mission. So she stopped trying to find Killian's eyes again and she gave all her attention to August, then David and Mary Margaret approached them again, and August made them all laugh with a funny story about his arriving to Paris once. A few minutes later they were left alone again "I'm guessing 'pretty face' is pretty boy over there. The one who can't stop staring at you" she rolled her eyes.

"He is not staring at me"

"Yes he is, but he is being pretty careful to look away when you look in his direction… Seriously, you are like a couple of teenagers" Emma smiled because yes, she felt like a teenager with butterflies on her stomach and all.

"I think he is mad at me, I have not answered his calls or texts for three weeks now, and I also think he's back with Tink"

"Who? The pretty blonde? Nah I don't think they are together like that" he said looking at Tink.

"Why don't you think so?" she asked hoping.

"Well…To begin with, we've been kind of giving each other looks from across the room, and he's been busy looking at you…so, to me they look more like you and me, very good friends" Emma frowned, perfect now everyone likes Tink.

"Do you like Tink?" she whispered to him. August looked up to where the petite blonde was standing and gave her a mischievous smile, Emma rolled her eyes.

"Well, she's pretty…The brunet over there she's more my type" he said looking at Ruby "But I don't think I stand a chance there" and Emma looked over at Ruby exactly at the moment when she grabbed the hand of the girl who arrived a few minutes ago, Dorothy. Oh!

"Don't tell me you haven't already imagined yourself with those two" she said and as soon as she saw August's smile she rolled her eyes, men.

"Oh I have dear" he said then he got closer to her and whispered "but in reality being in that situation can be very bad for your ego, when two beautiful women are all but paying attention to you. Been there done that" Emma laugh loudly, not for what he said per se, but for the funny picture her mind created of August being ignored by two women busy with themselves.

"Oh, Booth…you had a bad idea there telling me that"

"Damn, the things I do to make you laugh" he mumbled "Hey…I think you have your chance" somehow Emma knew August was talking about Killian and she looked up but couldn't see him anywhere "He just walked out by himself" Emma looked back at August feeling nervous all of a sudden. When she was about to get up, she saw David walking out too, so she straightened herself on her sit and frowned "What are you doing?" August asked.

"I don't want to leave you alone" she said.

"Really? Do you really think I can't handle myself in a room filled with nice people? Since when are you a coward?" he asked the last question frowning, and she looked helpless at his eyes "Dammit, I swear I'm finding Neal tomorrow and kicking his ass. Get up, go out there and apologize to that guy for ignoring him for three weeks, I'd be fuming" Emma took a big breath and got up, she can do this.

It was quieter outside, the moon was big and bright. She saw David and Killian sitting on a bench a few meters in front of her, she wanted to turn around. But she couldn't she would approach and wait for David to leave them alone, or maybe she'll ask Killian for a moment. When she was close enough she called his name, he was staring at the floor it took him a few seconds to look up directly at her eyes. Those smoldering eyes of him were intimidating at times, this was one of those times. David excused himself and walk back to the house while the both of them were intently staring at each other, Killian was frowning slightly.

"Good to see you" he said, even when he didn't look that happy to see her.

"Can I sit?" she asked and he nodded. As soon as she sat she realized it was easier this way, he was staring at the floor again and it was going to be easier to talk without his eyes drilling on her head "I want you to know I…I appreciate you calling every day the past three weeks and…" she said and Killian snorted.

"You sure know how to make a man feel pathetic" he looked at her smiling, but the smile didn't reach his eyes "look, Swan. It's ok, you don't need to explain" he said standing up, she didn't understand what was going on, but it felt as if he was about to close the door for them, and she was paralyzed. Maybe she really screwed things up by not answering one single call.

"Killian…" it was all she managed to say.

"I spent all day long wanting to have this conversation, but now I just don't want to have it" he said while one of his hands was nervously raking his hair "Things are different than I thought they would be… Look, I've had this conversation before and it didn't end well for me as I figure it won't now. We are still friends and I would love for us to remain friends…I just…we just kissed once right? We can be friends still" She was frozen, he was breaking up with her and they are not even together "I just hope you understand I need time to adjust" he stopped talking then nodded at her and walked away. She watched him walk inside the house, she felt frustrated and confused. She misread the whole situation, she thought he cared, she thought he wanted to try, but he didn't choose her as Neal did. To be honest she didn't understand half the things he said, she understood the words but not the meaning. Maybe what he tried to say was that he had tried to let other girls down easy before but they resisted so he didn't want their friendship to go through that conversation. What she was really certain about right now was that she couldn't walk back in, she was holding tears in her eyes, and felt a huge weight in her chest.

 **Tink.**

Killian's been brooding since the moment he walked in, even when she tried to tell him she didn't believe Emma was dating that guy, he ignored her completely. Later she saw him walking out to the garden, and didn't follow. He needs his alone time and to be honest she thought that Emma should follow him, if she doesn't she definitely doesn't care. But she was right Emma cared, she followed Killian short minutes after. She tried to relaxed then, everything was going to be fine, the both of them will walk back in smiling and being the adorable people they are around each other.

Emma's friend was having a conversation with Ruby and her girlfriend. But kept throwing glances at her, she was flattered, the guy was a knock out. That's why she was convinced now Emma was not with him, he was flirting with her from a far sitting right next to the blond, she was sure Emma even noticed once and rolled her eyes smiling, the same way she did when Killian flirted with a girl in a bar, of course before he met Emma. So now she was on a mission, Killian won't listen if she didn't have real answers, so she will ask the guy directly. She walked across the room and stood up in front of … August? Yes, August. The girls were laughing at some joke he said, Ruby saw her.

"Hello there, Tink. Have you met August?"

"I have, they introduce us earlier" she said smiling staring at the man's eyes.

"What's going on with Killian? He seems in a bad mood tonight" Ruby asked. But before she could answer August spoke.

"Killian? That's your boyfriend, right?" he asked and Ruby laugh.

"Oh dear, they couldn't be that to each other. I thought when I met them they were but no, they are more like siblings" Ruby answered.

"That's good to know" August said and winked at her. Tink smiled wider, August was in the same mission she was, looking for answers, that confirmed to her he was definitely not romantically involved with Emma.

"No, Killian's not my boyfriend we are friends and he just had a bad day, he'll be fine" she said the latest to Ruby. Ruby was a clever girl who loves playing matchmaker, so she grabbed Dorothy's hand and walked away with her "Are you Emma's boyfriend?"

"Oh, you are a direct kind of girl. I like that" she raised one of her eyebrows waiting for her answer he laughed "no we're not, we are also more like siblings. We know each other since we were kids…So now what? Do we lock both of our friends together in a room until they talk? Or do we lock together away?" he asked sensually and Tink laughed musically.

"You have to give it a better try than that" she answered, then she saw Killian walking back inside alone and upset "Excuse me" she followed him and she reached him in the foyer "Hey, what happened?"

"Nothing" he said trying to keep on walking, but she grabbed his arm.

"What happened? I saw Emma following you" he looked at her for a few seconds then she saw his resolve leaving him.

"I really don't want to listen to another woman I cared about telling me how I am not enough" Oh, the Milah crap again. And she thought he was over with those insecurities.

"Killian…"

"Don't pity me Tink, I am leaving…I can't be here right now" that was it, that's what infuriated her, the look in his eyes was the same he used to have, broken, forgotten, unloved.

"I do not pity you Killian Jones. And following that request I won't let you leave. This is your friend's house, your friend's birthday. And you are not leaving this place because of a girl, go to the bathroom compose yourself, then walk out and be the badass man I know" it seems she talked some sense into him because after a few seconds he walked in the direction of the bathroom. Now she was in a bad mood, she walked inside the living room, looked around and didn't find Emma, so she walked outside to the garden. The woman was there sitting on a bench

"What is wrong with you?" she asked and Emma looked up surprised by the question.

"Excuse me?" Emma frowned.

"I know this might not be my business, but I care about Killian, he doesn't deserve to be treated like that, he spent three weeks giving you space and time, he called you every day just so you knew he was there waiting for you…And you walk in here with another man? What is wrong with you?" Emma's pissed of expression turned into one of astonishment.

"I…August is just a friend" she mumbled.

"I know…because I asked August, I had my doubts because you were whispering and laughing and being so together with him while Killian was watching" she almost screamed at Emma in frustration.

"Why are you screaming at me? Aren't you with Killian? Using your logic then you are together too" Emma replied standing up raising her voice too. Tink couldn't believe what she heard.

"Really Emma?...right, I'm here trying to make my 'boyfriend' hook up with you" Tink said frowning and took a big breath to calm herself before she continued. Emma looked so wrecked now "Look, whatever you think you saw between us let me tell you something, it is not what you think. And if you can't believe it, then forget about it because you had a boyfriend then and I'm sure you did things with him. Killian's been through too much, and the way I just saw him in there" she said pointing with her finger to the house. A knot forming in her throat and tears filling her eyes "I never want to see him like that again, he might be able to take it but I want him to be happy for once, even for a little while" her voice trembled and she hated it, she hates to be here trying to make this stubborn girl understand. She knows she shouldn't be here screaming at Emma, Killian would kill her if he noticed this little outburst. But the only reason she walked out here trying to slap words to Emma's face was because she knows Emma cares, but is being stupid apparently, and if there is a chance for Killian's happiness she'll meddle if she has to "He likes you, like a lot…if you really want a chance with him do something. If you give him time to put on his emotional armor, you won't be able to see through that then".

"He's hurt" Emma whispered finally understanding.

"Go find him" Tink said softly and didn't hesitate to start walking.

 **Killian.**

He got into the bathroom, Tink was right he was not gonna leave David's birthday because of a woman. He has endured worst than this. After throwing water to his face, he came out feeling better. Not good, but better. Maybe he should go to New York, to do business from there for a while. He walked back into the living room, his eyes automatically travel to the direction were he saw August but Emma wasn't there, he walked toward Will who was talking passionately with David, in a manner he knows his friend uses just for football and he smiled with the thought. He stood in front of them, David palmed his back as soon as he saw him, but before they could start with any conversation someone grabbed his arm and turned him around, the next thing he knew was that someone was kissing him, it took him a couple seconds to realize that person was Emma, and he wrapped his arms around her pulling her closer.


	10. Chapter 10

**Emma.**

In the few little minutes it took her to walk back inside the house, she was frantically thinking of some way to make Killian understand, she opened the door and saw him a few steps inside standing next to David and she knew what to do, or at least what she was dying to do. If kissing him in front of everyone wasn't enough to get his attention, to make him understand with no words at all that he was so wrong on his assumptions, then nothing will. She grabbed his arm and turned him around in one motion, her hands found easily each side of his head to help her direct her lips to his. The whole thing happened quite fast, the first second he seemed surprised, but shortly his arms were pushing her closer. Soon they heard everyone around them whistling or encouraging them and they stop kissing, but Killian kept her close, his forehead found hers, she couldn't stop staring at him, he took a deep breath then smiled at her before he faced the crowd.

"Ok. The show is over and I need to talk to this fine lass, so excuse us" he said winking and Emma blushed when she noticed all eyes on them. She didn't think this through. Killian grabbed one of her hands and pulled her outside the room. As soon as they were in the safe and lonely foyer he turned around and pushed her against a wall, his lips finding hers with ease. All this time she had said to herself over and over again that she's been idealizing the first kiss they shared, no kiss is that good, at least she never had a kiss that good. But now she's here kissing him for the third time, and she knows that as amazing she thought their first kiss was, it was nothing compared to this one. That she has not been idealizing their first kiss, in fact now she knows how faded her memory of that kiss was, because she is facing reality and it's more amazing than whatever she thinks she remembers "My apologies, I've been wanting to do that since I walked in" he whispered when they stopped kissing

"Why did you walked away from me then?" she asked and at that moment she noticed how one of her hands was on his neck, the other one on his chest. With the question he tensed, probably remembering the earlier events. He took one step back, her arms falling to each side of her.

"You are not with him, right?" he asked giving a look in the direction of the living room when he looked back at her she denied with her head "I thought…" he said awkwardly.

"It's my fault, I disappear for three weeks then I reappear standing next to some guy" she said interrupting him "I didn't plan on bring him here. But he showed up at my place yesterday and…I was really nervous of coming here to finally see you. So I asked him to join me, it never crossed my mind you would think…"

"To be fair, Swan. I didn't even ask or give you time to say anything, I just assumed…bloody hell" he said, his right hand cupping her face, his thumb caressing her cheek "Sorry?" he asked with an apologetic smile. She nodded smiling, he took one step into her personal space again "so…what does this mean? Because I really would love to kiss you again…whenever I want and I need to be clear with that"

"I would love that too" she answered shyly

"That can be arranged" he said winking at her, He was about to kiss her again when they heard someone clearing his throat, they looked up and found David.

"So, it's time for dinner" he said and they nodded, Killian grabbed her hand and walked after David holding her hand.

* * *

 **Killian.**

They didn't even need to say they wanted to sit together on the table, everyone arranged themselves so they end up sitting next to each other and for some reason he doesn't understand Emma's friend was sitting with Tink openly flirting with her. How could he have been so stupid? Now without the ghost of irrational jealousy he was seeing clearly, not that he is ok with this man at all, he might be seeing clearly but the feelings he had the entire night before Emma kissed him are not that easily erased. And he has many questions still about this mystery man.

Dinner went on with any more distraught. Even when he stayed next to Emma what was left of the night, they didn't have a chance to talk and they have many things to talk about, so when it was time to leave Killian felt anxious about going their separate ways, every time he has been separated from her it was weeks before he saw her again, and the uneasy grew stronger when the August person approached them.

"Are you ready?" August asked Emma and she smiled beautifully to him and nodded, the guy turned to look at Killian, smiled and nodded his goodbye before he took his leave.

"Ok. So…I'm going home. Will I see you soon?" she asked him smiling to him in the most adorable way his seen until now.

"Come with me" he whispered getting even closer to her.

"Ahhmm"

"Is not that late, and we do need to talk…And to be honest I don't think I'm done being jealous of that man just yet" he said and look at her expectantly. She was thinking about it, he could see it on her face.

"Okay" she said finally and he grinned "Just let me go talk to August and give him my keys. He nodded and watched her walk out the house. If this guy was staying at Emma's place, he was definitely not letting her go home tonight.

"Is everything ok?" David's question brought him out of his trance watching the front door.

"More than ok, mate" he answered still looking at the door with what he knows is a stupid happy smile, then he turn his attention at David, and his friend was smiling widely at him.

"Be patient, Killian. I'm sure she's worthy"

"I'm sure of that too…thanks for everything, mate. Happy Birthday" He walked out when he said goodbye to his friend and saw Emma talking to her friend by the guy's car. He felt the tiny little presence of his best mate next to him.

"So?..." he heard Tink ask. And he could hear the smile.

"I'm a stubborn ass, who should have listened to you all the times you said they were just friends" he said sounding annoyed, but he was smiling, he was happy.

"Very well, I hope you learned your lesson and start listening to me more often" Then August waved at Tink "Ok. So that's my cue. Goodnight!" She only took a step when Killian grabbed her by the arm.

"Hey…Where are you going?" he asked confused, he didn't trust that man he was not gonna send Tink with him.

"I took a cab hoping you will drive me back home, but now you have company and he offered the ride"

"I can still drive you, you are very tiny, you still fit in my car"

"Don't be silly, how bad could it be, he is Emma's friend and he is handsome" she winked at him and he rolled his eyes.

"Fine, go be murdered by the stranger" he said letting her arm go.

"He won't murder her" he heard Emma's amused voice then he looked at her "What am I getting into? Is he this overprotective all the time?" she asked addressing Tink, and he could easily see the both of them ganging up against him, they hating each other sounds way better now.

"Oh you don't even know" Tink said laughing and Emma laugh back. And all he could do was give Tink ' _I'm going to kill you_ ' look.

"Thank you" Emma said to Tink when they stop laughing

"Oh, don't even mention it" the girl said back looking surprise.

"No, really thank you" Emma said again looking serious and grateful "Now go, August is waiting" Tink nodded and walk towards August's car.

"Do I want to know?" he asked Emma about her thanking Tink, the girl just smiled.

"Let's go" she said with her pretty smile.

He drove them back to his apartment. He opened a bottle of wine and they sat next to each other on the couch "I have many questions, love. But, I'm sorry I really need to know who's August" she rolled her eyes. Killian is not the kind of man to let topics as important as he sees this one on assumptions, he's an honest kind of man and she'll have to get use to it.

"He is a friend, we met when we were kids in a foster home. We were inseparable then…you could say he is more like family. There's nothing going on, I promise" she explained.

"humh…Why did I never hear you talk about him before?"

"Well I barely talked about my past before, and we could say August and I were distant, he didn't like Neal for me…I guess time prove him right"

"I like him already" He joked sarcastically "Love, I want to take this opportunity to be as clear as I can about my intentions with you" he said changing the topic and his sitting position so he could face her. Emma said nothing so he continued "I'm not playing here, I know how I feel about you and I am pretty certain I want a relationship with you. A real one, based in trust and respect, and I am sure we can make it" Emma was frozen and he decided to continue while she was silent obviously paying attention to every single one of his words "And I want you to know we'll go at your own pace, I don't want us to rush into anything you are not ready for…but please, please don't disappear again" at his last words Emma's frozen expression changed into an apologetic one.

"I'm so sorry Killian. I was trying to apologize at the party when you walked away from me…I'm really sorry I didn't answer any of your calls or texted you or something. It wasn't fair…I needed time but I could have answered at least once. And when I was ready to do it the party was coming and I decided it be better to just meet there. I promise I won't do it again…and about your intentions..." she said blushing slightly "I'm glad to hear you feel that way, because I would like to try too" and he heard enough, he kissed her passionately.

They fell asleep on the couch, Emma lying on top of him. They talked for hours, and when he fell asleep a smile was on his face.

* * *

Author's Note: I'm really sorry it took me so long to post this chapter, life's been busy lately. This was a short easy-breazy chapter. There are a few obstacles for this couple to face, and one of my main ideas when I thought about this fic is about to happen to them, I've been thinking about avoiding it but in the end I decided if it was one of the first things I wanted to write, then I should trust my muse. But it is going to shake this relationship real hard.

Let me know what you think, reviews are like fuel to a writter.


	11. Chapter 11

**Emma.**

She's never been before in a relationship that felt healthy from the very start. She never understood what the word "Healthy" meant when people were referring to a relationship. But whatever the meaning is, it has to be very close to the relationship Killian and her had developed. Yes, they were barely starting things up, but everything felt so easy, in a good sense of the word. To make a date appointment was easy, they agree quite fast on time or place, sometimes they just stayed home and read in silence next to each other, or they end up watching tv, agreeing easily on a show to watch. Simple things she never managed to have with Neal. She is not trying to compare because there is no comparison, but she's acknowledged many things she never had before with a partner.

But there was one thing missing between them still, she's the one who's been trying to delay it for them, and Killian has been supportive of whatever she needs. But that does not mean she doesn't want to go for it. Every time they found themselves on a steamy make out session it was getting harder and harder to ignore her whole body pulsing to the rhythm of his every move. Being honest with herself she was scared, things were so good between them, and sex always ruins things. When she met Neal, he was all fantastic and supportive, and sweet, then the more they had sex the more distant he seemed, as if he was so secure of her, he wouldn't even try to court her anymore. Well, eventually she fell for his roommate and here she is.

They have been dating for almost a month, and Emma's been staying at his place a lot or sometimes he works late and ends up knocking at her door staying at her place, the both of them already have a bunch of things in the other's apartment. But they have not taken that final step that will seal their physical relationship. Everything was what you can call perfect, Killian is an amazing partner, thoughtful, generous, sweet, considered, and with an amazing plus of being sinfully hot. And all those adjectives and probably more that she can't think about right this moment, makes what she's going through today more difficult.

She's right at this moment, hiding inside one of the stools of her office's bathroom, biting intently one of her fingernails almost drawing blood out of her finger, holding with her other hand a pregnancy test waiting for the result. She is late, she's been for a while but she said to herself at first it was because of the stress of the brake up, then her body felt as if it was coming at any time but never did, and she's been so happily lost in the first stage of her relationship with Killian that she let time go by without even noticing. But by this time the responsible thing to do was to take a test. After the three longest minutes she's had to endure in her entire life she saw the very clear form of a positive sign. She froze for a minute, then she threw the test in the garbage bin she walked out of the stool feeling numb and washed her hands, she looked at herself on the mirror, her head was imploding, so her body was working on autopilot. She stared at her reflection for a long time, without really looking at herself, lost in her thoughts or at least trying to make sense of what she just found out. She walked out of the bathroom and went straight to her desk, her eyes looking straight ahead to nothing in particular, then she heard Elsa's voice.

"Emma? Are you alright?"

"Huh?" she managed to ask looking at her friend's eyes.

"You look pale. Are you ok?"

"How accurate is a home pregnancy test?" she asked ignoring Elsa's questions. Elsa frowned worriedly.

"From what I know they can give you a false negative, but if it is positive is quite accurate. Are you pregnant?"the girl asked surprised. Emma's eyes traveled to her desk feeling lost and nodded softly "Oh my god…" Elsa exclaimed pulling a chair and sitting next to Emma, worried clear on her face "Dear, you shouldn't worry so much. Killian seems like a very nice guy, I'm sure you are worrying for nothing" when Emma heard her words looked her in the eyes again, tears barely concealed.

"You are right, he is nice, and sweet, and the most amazing man I've ever been with…He doesn't deserve this" tears crossed her face, and Elsa grabbed one of her hands, looking at her with a sincere smile.

"Sweetie…It is soon for the both of you, but I'm sure you can work it out. I bet he'll be thrilled"

"No, he won't…We haven't…he's not the father" Emma tried to explain and Elsa's expression was as frozen as Emma's was a few minutes ago "Of course everything was too good to be truth. Emma Swan was not brought to this world to have nice things"

"Don't say that. You have a nice thing growing inside you right now. Yes, things are…complicated, but a baby is something to be happy about…Do you...Do you want this baby?" Elsa asked with a worried frown. Emma looked into her eyes thoughtfully then she put a hand over her stomach.

"Of course" she said softly "I…I'm just sadden because I'll lose Killian"

"You don't know that"

"I can't ask him to do this with me. It's easy if we just broke up" Elsa shook her head.

"Just talk to him, give him a chance to make a choice for his own, don't make it for him…And you should make a doctor's appointment" Emma nodded and Elsa went back to her desk, her friend knows her well enough to give her space.

She texted Killian, after a few minutes trying to get back to the paper work on her desk and failing, asking him to meet her tonight at her apartment. She needs to do this today, he texted back almost immediately as he used to that he'll bring dinner, she started to text back not to do it but then she reconsidered, she didn't want to predisposed him to a bad conversation, so she deleted what she had written and texted back a simple 'Ok'.

She wants to be a mother, of course she wants that. But she was not expecting it right now. She had this dream of having a baby with someone she loves and loves her back, so they can raise this kid together. She never wanted to see Neal again, now she has to, maybe. She didn't want to think about Neal. Killian and his beautiful smile was on the front of her mind.

* * *

 **Killian.**

He was waiting for his food to go at Granny's. So he decided to call Tink.

"So he lives" she said as soon as she answered the call.

"Yeah yeah, don't waste precious time by being petty" he answered annoyed.

"I thought you forgot I existed at all" he could hear the smile and he smiled back.

"Well I have called but you've been busy with your new conquest"

"Oh come on, we are just friends" she defended herself.

"Yeah right!"

"What we do inside closed doors is none of your business" she replied giggling.

"Ughh…bad idea to call you"

"I'm messing up with you. So…how are you?" she asked curiosity clear on her voice.

"I'm very well, thanks for asking" he said smiling.

"So it was worth all the waiting and all the drama"

"It was"

"Don't mess it up" she warned him.

"I don't intend to, love" he said with a goofy smile "How are you? Is the bloke treating you well?"

"Stop it. We are just getting to know each other…but he is fine"

"Well I'm just happy you keep him away from Emma" he joked.

"They are just friends, you need to stop it with that" she answered probably rolling her eyes.

"I know, It's just good to know he is interested in someone else" at that moment the waiter put a big brown bag in front of him "Love, I need to go. I would love to see you soon, I'll call you tomorrow"

"Love to hear your voice Jones, keep it coming…Say hi to Emma for me"

"I will, bye"

He paid for the food, and took his leave. He was happy he was seeing Emma tonight, well they see each other almost every night at least for a little while, but it's been a busy couple of days, and their last meeting was way too briefly for his taste. He was planning to have a nice quiet dinner, maybe watch some tv or whatever Emma is up to, and sleep right next to her. And he needs to tell her he has to make a trip to New York, there are some business he has to attend there and he hopes she can go with him for a couple days. He parked in front of Emma's building and walked inside smiling to whoever he approached, so this is what it feels to be happy. He knocked on the door and Emma was there almost immediately, a frown replaced his smiled when he looked into her eyes. She's been crying that's obvious, her eyes were red rimmed and she looked…well it was difficult to describe the way she looked, the words that came to his mind was Lost.

"Come in" she said softly trying to smile and not really succeeding. He walked in and put the bag on the table.

"What's wrong?" he asked. Emma frowned but ignored his question.

"Are you hungry? We could eat first?" she asked avoiding his eyes and he really worried then.

"Whatever you want, love"

"I want to eat" she said and started walking toward the table, but he put himself on her way, grabbed her chin forcing her to look into his eyes.

"Whatever it is you know you can talk to me, right?" and looked into her eyes waiting for an answer.

"I know" she said finally and he let her walk past him. He made a vow not to push her into anything, and whatever is going on, he trusts she will tell him as soon as she gathers her confidence. He sat down on the table and watched her in silence put their food into plates, finally she sat down and took a bite from her sandwich, after a few minutes she seemed more relaxed and started talking "how was your day?"

"Ahhm...very good" he answered with a smile taking the opportunity to ease the mood, try to make her comfortable so she can tell him eventually what's going on "Things in New York are happening and I have to travel there very soon. I was actually thinking we can go together for a couple of days" Emma looked surprised "…if you are able to, of course" she smiled with nostalgia, and he felt so confused.

"I don't know…"

"You don't have to tell me right away, maybe you need to check your schedule or something" he tried to explain and she just nodded staring at her sandwich. This is the most uncomfortable dinner he ever had with this woman, and it was slowly pushing his temper, but he knows he needs to give her time to put into words whatever is going on in her head.

"I wish I met you before, a few years earlier, when I felt the world was against me, when everything was wrong in my life, I wish I met you then" she said after a few minutes of silence staring at the uneaten half of her sandwich, she looked into his eyes before she added "You would've been a very good influence in my life" Killian frowned trying to make sense of her words, trying to understand where is she coming from.

"Maybe a few years earlier I was too much of a mess to be good for you. Although, I'm pretty sure I would had been a sucker for you even then" he smiled softly and she mirrored his smile. She then stared at her half eaten sandwich as it held all the answers of the universe in it "Ok. I'm not hungry anymore, and you evidently aren't either. What's going on? You are worrying me" She looked into his eyes for a few seconds, then she closed her eyes tightly and he knew the truth was coming, she opened her eyes before speaking.

"I'm pregnant" she said frowning in concentration. For a few seconds Killian stayed still, his mouth slightly open in surprise, the world colliding inside his head, his only focus were Emma's green eyes "I'm sorry" she added and that awoke him from his trance.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked almost whispering, it wasn't easy to find his voice with his mind imploding from the inside.

"Because…This between us it could have been good. I'm so sorry…I'm just glad we haven't…that'd be even more confusing" she said staring at her hands on the table looking completely embarrassed.

"It could have been?" he asked confused. Is she seriously breaking up with him without giving him a bloody chance to say a single word? Emma looked up into his eyes.

"I can't and I won't put you through this…This is the best for everyone"

"I will agree this is…is…complicated…But you have to give me more than just one minute to take it in" he said trying with all his might to control his temper, because what he really wanted to do was to take a glass and crash it against the wall or on Neal's face.

"There's not much to think about…Maybe you don't see it now, but soon I'll be walking around with a huge bump carrying another man's baby inside me and you will resent it, I rather have a clean break now than a messy one later"

"So, let me see if I get this thing right. You brought me here on false pretenses, made me sit here and have the most awkward dinner ever to tell me in the end to fuck off. You might as well text me the news and avoid me this nonsense" he said a bit too loud, got up and walked to the closest window trying to calm down. Then he heard Emma's voice.

"Is not nonsense, is not a puppy we are talking about here" He turned to look into her eyes, they were filled with unshed tears.

"The nonsense is you breaking up with me" he barely got the words out, because a huge not formed in his throat just with the idea.

"Is easy this way" she said cleaning a tear that finally left one of her eyes.

"Easy for whom?" he asked frustrated raking a hand through his hair.

"For you" she said cleaning more tears, but looking sure of her words.

"You really don't understand how I feel about you. Because what you call 'easy' sounds like the most difficult thing in the world"

"I think you better go" was all she answered back and he could almost hear his heart breaking.

"Whatever you need, love" he said sarcastically, his own words turned into him, and she knew it, she knew he'll do whatever she asks him to do, even leaving her. He started walking towards the door, but before he reached it he turned around to look at her again, she looked so broken, probably as broken as him but he knows her good enough to know that staying it could be worst than leaving right now "I'm not giving up on you…" her tears were running freely, she stopped cleaning them a while ago. She was staring at her hands "I love you, you know…" she looked surprised but didn't look up at him "And I hate to say it right now, but I really don't know if you'll give me another chance to" he opened the door and gave her a last look before he walked out. He closed the door and lie against it and heard Emma sobbing inside, he's been through a lot of crap, a lot of heartbreaking shit, but this is going to the top. His hand reached for the door knob by pure instinct and to his luck the door was unlocked, he opened it and walked inside. She looked up instantly, he was almost running towards her, she stood up from the chair and their body's collided in a tight hug.

* * *

A/N: I wrote two different takes of chapter 11. With two different roads to take. It was hard to decide wich one was better. But as I said in the note I left in the last chapter, what happened in this one is what I thought about from the very start, before I even started writting the whole thing, it was hard to trust my muse, but in the end after reading both takes this one was the best one. So I really hope you like where this is going. I'm not trying to turn it into a pregnancy fic, is not about that. I really like to add Henry to my fics, because Emma is many things but being a mother is one of her most amazing features. And a baby it's the last gift from Neal, so he will keep messing up this relationship making things hard for our favorite couple.


	12. Chapter 12

**Killian.**

"So...How is Emma doing?" Tink asked him after a few minutes of silence. He picked her up to go to dinner at Granny's with her. Emma was avoiding people, and as much as he said he'll stay home with her she insisted for him to go hang out with his friend.

"She's fine" he said automatically, the way he would answer to anyone who'd ask but this was Tink and he knew that was not going to be answer enough for her, so he gave her a quick look "She's holding up. She's been throwing up a bit and I think the cravings are starting to show"

"I see…and how are you?" and he knew that this was the question she really wanted to ask.

"I'm fine, love" he answered and gave her a quick smile.

"You don't look fine, Killian. You know you can talk to me" she said and he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

"It's just…I'm even kind of exited with the idea of the baby…I know I'm not his father but I don't care…"

"Is a he?"

"Oh, no…we don't know yet, I just keep saying is a boy" he said with a smile, but soon it was erased by a memory, because yes, he was not fine, Tink's been always good at reading him. Emma keeps fighting him for everything, she is on edge and keeps him on edge and is exhausting.

"You look tired" she said sounding worried.

"I am tired…" he admitted parking in front of Granny's but making no move to leave the car "I don't remember when was the last time I kissed her or enjoyed a meal without ending it in an argument…She's trying to push me away and I won't let her, because there are this moments when I get to hold her and everything is all right, I live for those moments" he admitted with a sad smile on his face.

"I thought you were together together" Tink said confused and Killian gave her a sarcastic laugh.

"Well, love. She decided that we stay friends…you know, we see each other daily, act as a couple, make decisions as a couple, sometimes sleep together but I don't get to bloody kiss her or anything" he said ventilating his frustration in the privacy of his car.

"You need to put yourself in her shoes. She must feel like she's pushing you into this situation and it must be hard" Tink said trying to be supportive.

"At least she keeps me around…It's as if she's waiting for me to leave at any moment…I just…I just don't know how to prove her I'm in this for the long haul"

"You show her and say it every chance you got"

"That's been my plan all along" he opened the door of the car, and the both of them walked inside the diner. They found a free booth at the back.

"What about Neal?" She asked when they were finally sitting. He was taking this alone time to answer all of Tink's questions, there is no one else he would discuss this, and he had a go from Emma, she asked him to talk to someone about this, and they both knew that person was Tink.

"M.I.A. the last time we checked. It took me a while to convince her to tell him, and when she finally made her mind up we just couldn't find him. I went with her to Neal's father, the man is as unpleasant as you might remember him, not changed a single bit" he said frowning, he never liked that man.

"Well, I remember certain girlfriend he had that left him for you, so he is not your biggest fan" she said smiling and Killian laugh with the memory.

"I should have known that a woman who was into that kind of man was not good news" he shook his head trying to get rid of the bad memories Milah brought.

"And his dad doesn't know where he is?" Tink asked steering the conversation back to the main subject.

"He was very clear he does know where he is, He is not telling us. Emma told him about the pregnancy, but that just made him focus on me and he went on about me trying to push my mistakes into another man, and Emma lost her temper, that's been very thin lately by the way. And as much as I wanted to punch his ugly face I took her out of there. So, no Neal…Not like we need him, but we were friends…he should know he's going to be a father"

"Maybe his dad tells him about it"

"I don't think he would, but lets hope for it. He left the city, but I don't know where to"

"The important thing is that Emma is not alone in this" she said with a bright smile and Killian smiled back. And she is definitely not alone, Mary Margaret and David have become her best friends, and have been very supportive to his Swan, and he, well he is in this in body and soul. He's never been this in love before, they haven't consummated their love yet, and it doesn't matter to him anymore, of course he wants to but is not his priority right now. He is ok with whenever she is ready. He knows she feels torn, because she loves and wants her baby, but feels guilty for having another man's child. And no matter how much he explains to her that it doesn't matter to him, she keeps saying she failed him.

* * *

 **Emma.**

"I failed him"

"Emma, don't say that. You haven't failed anyone" August scolded her putting a cup of hot cocoa in front of her on the table.

"Of course I did, I didn't only failed Killian, I failed this baby"

"If you are going to talk nonsense all night then I'll go" he warned her sitting in front of her.

August and Tink split tonight to take on their jobs as best friends. Emma was barely socializing lately and Killian's been locked up with her. So she's been worried about him, her mood swings were affecting them both, and a night talking to someone who isn't one another was more than needed now.

"Explain to me please, how is that you decided it was best to be just friends with him when you two are together all your free time?" August asked her. He was so confused when she told him earlier her relationship with Killian was on a friend zone since the pregnancy test.

"Is the best for him" she said plainly.

"How? Look, you know I'll always try to be honest with you no matter what, right?" he asked and Emma nodded so he continued "You have this man who is stubborn enough to ignore you every time you try to push him away, and is not even getting any from you?…" he looked at her pointedly and Emma blushed a little "I think he deserves a Man of the Year award, he is a saint or is really stupid"

"You don't understand" Emma mumbled.

"Oh I understand, I understand you are scared of letting him in. So you think that putting the both of you in an unhappy and unfulfilling relationship is better. What you are not counting on is that if one day he leaves it would be no one else's fault but yours. Now tell me if this is really about him, how is it better for him? Huh? Do you think he is happy with this arrangement? Or do you think he'll be happy staying away from you? Because I think he'll be happy if you just stop being stubborn and accept you two are a couple" Emma was holding the cup of hot cocoa tightly, and her eyes were filled with unshed tears when August finished his questioning "You know what I really want to know?" he asked and waited for her response so she shook her head softly "Are you happy?"

"No" she said after a few seconds of staring into her cup. Of course she wasn't happy, she wanted to do so many things with Killian and she can't. And the reasons she had for that now are blurred.

"Do you think you'll be happier if you give him a chance?"

"But he…"

"No. We already established he'll be happier with you" he interrupted her.

"I'm scared" she admitted and August gave her a sympathetic smile.

"I know you are. But the best things in the world are scary, you need to be brave" he said squishing her hand on the cup. She smiled "There is another subject we need to address" he added then sipped at his own cup of cocoa. Emma was lost "Why do you seem to be avoiding the world? Tink thinks you hate her or something"

"I'm not avoiding the world, I go to work every day and I don't hate Tink"

"I have tried to see you before tonight, and got not real answer. I'm sure you called because you knew Tink was going out with Killian"

"I don't hate her, I like her. I think she is great"

"But?"

"I don't know, she is very protective of Killian and I have this stupid feeling like I failed her too" August let out a sight.

"Do you know what I like most of her? She is as fierce as she is sweet...She likes you, and she doesn't judge you for anything" he explained and Emma felt relieved. Of course she's been avoiding Tink, the last thing she needs right now is another admonishment like the one at David's birthday.

"Really?" she asked timidly and August nodded with a smile "So…Is Tink the reason you are still in Boston?" August smiled widely.

"Yes, she's one of the reasons. But the most important reason is you, if I leave who is going to talk sense into that pretty head of yours?"

Emma felt more confident and lighter after a long conversation with August. She was doing the dishes when she got a text from Killian saying he was home, asking her how was her night. She felt guilty again, but this time for a different reason, August was right she shouldn't feel guilty for being pregnant, she is guilty for making the both of them miserable. So she grabbed her purse, car keys and walked out the door.

She never answered Killian's text because what she needs to say she needs to say it in person. So here she was standing in front of his door, feeling nervous. She knocked and waited, soon Killian opened the door and looked surprised to see her standing there, but his surprise was soon replaced with his beautiful smile.

"Please, come in" he said stepping aside "Is everything Ok? I was getting worried you never texted me back" she was anxious and as soon as he closed the door she stepped into his personal space, grabbed him by the shirt and pull him into a kiss.

"I'm sorry" she said as soon as they stopped kissing, with her forehead pressed to his.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"For everything…August remembered me that I have this tendency to expect the worst from people…My childhood…people were always letting me down…" she explained.

"I don't intend to let you down" he said interrupting her.

"I know…and I think I've known it all along, but it's so scary…"

"I know it is, Emma…I have my own share of broken heart…But I can't see a life without you in it, so I choose to be the best person I can be for you" he said looking intently into her eyes. And Emma smiled feeling so happy, how could she deny herself this before?

"I want us to be a couple again" she admitted and his smiled widely.

"I want that too very much" he gave her a peck on the lips and added "I should have called August a few weeks ago"

"Maybe you should" she said laughing and he got back to kiss her.

* * *

 **Killian.**

He woke up the next morning feeling the weight of Emma's head on his shoulder. He smiled before he opened his eyes, her blonde hair was all over his chest and his pillow, and there is no way he could be happier than right now. Emma moved and pressed her naked body to his even closer, and he held her tightly. It was definitely worth the wait, making love to the woman you love is always a high, he's only had it once before, but now it is even better because he is mature enough to enjoy it and acknowledge it.

So now they were back on track, but there is still Neal to find, and a baby to expect in a few months.


	13. Chapter 13

**Emma.**

Two things were happening this weekend, the first one's been going on gradually, they were moving in together. Killian took a portion of his living room to build the baby's room. She was so touched when he showed it to her, at first he said it was for when they stay at his place but eventually it was obvious that Emma practically was living there so they had a long talk and she decided to officially move in, of course it took her a while, she did it at her own pace, moving one box a week, until he had to be firm about it. So, here she is standing at her old apartment's door staring into it, feeling nostalgic but happy. This place was the closest she thinks a home should feel like, she thought it was, until she missed him every night she was not staying with him, at this point she doesn't even remember when was the last time she slept in this place, so it made no sense to keep paying the rent. And maybe, just maybe a home is not a place but a person. Then it came the other issue, Killian was not taking one cent from her, and she was aware that what she was paying for her small apartment wouldn't cover much for his, but she wanted to pay for something so it came the bargaining, in the end he'll allowed her to pay for some bills (the ones she knows are the cheapest ones) but that man is as stubborn as she is, so that was as far as she could get in the matter.

The second thing is that they are finally going to New York, Killian has a meeting with another company that wants to do business with his, so she'll spend a few hours alone Saturday morning, but after that they'll have the weekend for themselves. She took the day off so they can move her last boxes out and close her old apartment.

"Cheer up, love…Is Friday and we are going to New York" she heard Killian's voice as he was approaching, he embraced her from behind. He left the last box in the car and was back for her.

"Yes, because you can party much with the pregnant lady"

"Oh, we can party allright…we do it quite often in the privacy of our bedroom" his lips pressed to her ear, she rolled her eyes but smiled.

"Ok, party boy. Let's go because I know your suitcase is unfinished"

They went home, and Killian ran to his suitcase. Emma checked her own, and went to the bathroom to gather some of Killian's things from it, she returned and handed him his toothbrush, shaving machine, shampoo and lotion. Then she sat on the bed next to his suitcase where he was folding clothes. Suddenly she felt it again, so she roughly took one of his hands and put it on top of her small belly.

"Can you feel it?" she asked him and she knew when he felt it because his eyes went wide, he kneeled in front of her and put both of his hands on her.

"Woaw" he was out of words.

"I told you I could feel it, the doctor said we were going to feel it soon"

"Bloody hell" he said with a huge smile. She was at week 21, she was not that big yet. But the baby was starting to move, she wasn't certain at first, but now it's so clear it is kicking her softly from the inside. She was so lucky, she has this gorgeous man, that's looking into her stomach with awe on his face, and she never felt more in love than right now.

She caressed his face with her hand and wanted to say it, she has it on the tip of her tong. The feeling is so strong, she hasn't said the L word yet, and lately the need to say it came more and more often. She knows that sometimes he knew how close she's been to saying it, like right now. He is staring into her eyes with adoration, expecting for whatever she is about to say, and once again she became the coward she really is, the lost girl. Is not that simple, to put those three words out is so hard for her. She just tries to show him as much as she can, hoping he'll understand how difficult it is. When it was obvious she wasn't saying anything his smile faltered a little and he stopped staring into her eyes and caressed her belly once more before getting back to his suitcase.

 **Killian.**

He knows she loves him, he knows it. He can feel it, he can see it in her eyes, there are times when he is so certain that she is about to say it, but she never does. The thing is that sometimes he loses his confidence, and he feels that maybe he is not enough, once again he is not enough. This feeling comes particularly after every time someone ask or say something about her baby and she quickly denies his parenthood. He knows he is not the father, but to be honest sometimes he forgets. He is so close, he is planning this baby with her, he is buying baby things, he sleeps with this baby growing between them, pressed to his back or his side. Then she quickly corrects anyone saying "He is not the father" and it hurts. Not that he is expecting her to say he is, but the woman on the baby store didn't need to know, or the girl who took their order at brunch last Sunday. This kid has his father if he wants to be a part of his life, but will have him too and Emma seems to forget it. He loves her, and lives in awe of the fact she's growing a human inside of her, he's fallen in love with this baby too, and she doesn't seem to notice, and he doesn't know how to have this conversation with her.

They arrived at the hotel in New York later that night. She was tired from the flight so she took a bath and went straight to bed. He was feeling down, the self loathing sometimes came back with force. Earlier when the baby was moving, he was so focused looking into her stomach and feeling the soft kicks on his hand that when she touch his face she awoke him from the amazement, he looked into her eyes and saw it again, he thought that was the moment he was going to hear it for the first time, but he didn't, she didn't say anything. And he knows he is being silly, she moved in with him, she wants to be with him, but he can't help but let his insecurities rolled through him sometimes, let his mind go to scary place, places where Emma is not able to say it because she doesn't feel it, because she still loves Neal, because he is not good enough. Usually it takes one of Emma's smiles to drive every doubt out of him, but she is sleeping right now and he doesn't want to disturb her.

He fell asleep on the small couch that's next to the window. Emma's hand woke him, touching his face the way she always does, he doesn't know how long he slept but is dark still "Come to bed" she said softly giving a kiss on top of his head. He sat down slowly waking from a not pleasant dream, fueled by the insecure thoughts he was having before he fell asleep, a dream where he couldn't find Emma anywhere, and he kept walking and walking, opening and closing doors, calling her name and she was nowhere. He rolled his arms around her waist pulling her close, his face pressed to the small swell of her womb "Hi" he said feeling relieved of having her right in front of him after that nightmare. He felt a soft kick on his cheek from the baby and Emma chuckle "Hello, lad" he said with a smile and felt the soft kick once more. She was raking his hair with her fingers.

"Come to bed" she repeated and he nodded not pulling away from her. After a few second he let her go and followed her to bed. She cuddled to his side, his shoulder pillowed her head, her hand placed on top of his heart, her smell surrounding him. He can be really stupid sometimes, entertaining the thoughts he had earlier.

The next morning he left to his meeting after breakfast, Emma said goodbye with a passionate kiss and a tight hug, so he went out smiling. He didn't know much from the company he was meeting with, he just knew they wanted to meet with him in person, he tried to send Will but they wouldn't take him, all he knew about this company was that they sell clothes, very expensive clothes, that's as much as he could gather from their website, they wanted some exclusivity contract for deliveries all over the country by boat. They had a few franchises of clothing stores and they delivered to every single one. So that sounded like a lot of moving clothing around, very profitable for his company.

He arrived to the address they gave him, it was odd that the meeting was taking place a Saturday morning, but this was New York, probably it was ok for its standards. A young man holding a folder was waiting for him in front of the building.

"Mr. Jones, I'm Mrs. Grey assistant. I'll walk you inside" the young man said as soon as he approached. Killian nodded and followed him inside.

"It's not a working day, I gather" he said looking around him, pointing the obvious solitude of the working stations.

"No, just a few people working today. It was the only available day for Mrs. Grey. The man walked him to an empty conference room. Modern furniture, a long black table, all the walls were made of glass "Mrs Gray will be here soon, she is taking a call right now"

"Thank you" he said before the man left the room. He walked towards the huge window and looked outside giving his back to the door. It didn't take much to think about Emma, she was always pulsating in the back of his mind, he has planned to take her to dinner and a Broadway show tonight, in the afternoon they could go shopping, the both of them enjoy baby stores way too much, so they already talked about visiting a few ones. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't listen the door opening until the person who walked in spoke out loud.

"Oh, I'm so glad to see you" the woman said and he froze for one second before he turn around following the sound, the sound of that voice was so familiar once upon a time. He frowned, because he wasn't glad to see Milah at all.

"Mrs Grey?" he asked raising his eyebrow. She gave him that beautiful smile he used to love.

"I married" she said then she moved her hand in front of him, no ring was in it "then I divorced"

"I always took you for the kind of woman who would sit around all day and maybe go out to spend some wanker's money" he said, he was not happy right now, he felt cornered and cheated. No money in the world would've made him meet with this woman.

"No you didn't, not always at least. Maybe after we split up"

"We didn't split up, you left me for some wallet" he said and her smile faltered for a second but she recovered fast, and smiling again she took a sit on the table and pointed the chair next to her for him to seat. He rounded the table and sat in the one in front of her "Am I here to talk business or was this all a sham to bring me here?"

"Both" she replied and winked at him, he tried to keep his temper at bay, so he looked away "I knew you had potential, but you just couldn't see it. You might be mad at me right now, but if I didn't give you the push you wouldn't had done as good as you did with your brother's company. I'm so proud of you"

"You didn't give me a push, love. You dump me for a rich man. And whatever I had accomplished had nothing to do with you" she smiled again.

"Whatever, darling. Is there a Mrs. Jones?" she asked and he looked into her eyes.

"Really? … If this is all you want to talk about then I'll take my leave. I'll send someone else to do business with you."

"Oh, come on. That was your first question, can't blame a girl for being curious…And I said it before you came all the way here, I'll only do business with you" he passed his left hand through his hair and he noticed her eyes following his movement "No ring" she said smiling.

"I'm in town with my girlfriend. So don't even entertain the thought of me being lonely waiting for you or some crap like that"

"She's a lucky girl" Killian was uncomfortable and upset, but he was not going to give this woman power over him. He stood up again and looked her in the eyes.

"Look, if you are really interested in our services I can send my best man to do business with you. He'll be here on monday if he has to. Personally, I'm not interested in working with your company anymore"

"Killian, don't be like this. I really wanted to see you" she said looking disappointed.

"The thing is I really didn't want to see you. Have a nice life, darling" he said finally and walked away.

If she would have approach him differently maybe he would have thought about doing business whit her, but if things were staring with manipulation then that's a deal he rather stay out of. He went out the building and started walking, he was not going to stand right in front of it waiting for a cab. Eventually he grabbed one and got back to the Hotel, Emma was not in the room, she was probably walking around or shopping. And to be honest he was a bit relief she wasn't in the room, he was upset and wanted to take a bath to cool off.

 **Emma.**

She wanted to buy Killian a present. He is always giving something to her, flowers, small details, things for the baby. She felt that finding something for him was something she could do to use her free time this morning. Killian wears a long necklace all the time, a long chain with a golden cross with a skull on the center, he told her it was a gift from his brother, it was a private joke because Liam always called him "pirate", and after his brother's death he only takes it off to take a bath or sleep. She walked into a jewelry store, remembering that Mary Margaret's birthday is coming, and she thought maybe she could find pretty earrings in this store. But what she found a few minutes after entering and looking around was a section with pendants, there was one with the form of a small sword that will go perfectly in Killian's necklace, next to the cross. It will fit him completely and in an impulse she bought it.

She got back to the hotel room surprised to find Killian in it. Well he was coming out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, looking all levels of hot "Hey…I thought you were coming back later"

"I thought so too, love" he said as he approached her and gave her a tight hug.

"Not complaining, you can hug me almost naked as much as you want" she said when she noticed this was becoming a really long hug "but, is everything alright?" he let her go enough to look into her eyes.

"Sort of" was his reply and Emma frowned worrying.

"So the meeting didn't go well?"

"No, it didn't…It was with my exgirlfriend" he said turning around walking towards the closet.

"What?" and here she felt so confused "What ex girlfriend? The ex girlfriend?"

"Yeah, it was Milah" he said putting clothes on the bed. Apparently he couldn't stop moving, so Emma put the bags she came in with on the table, walked towards him and took the clothes out of his hands, pushing him gently to sit on the bed.

"Are you ok?" She asked when he was sitting in front of her. She understands the feeling, if she founds Neal outside this very room, she would be this upset or even more. She will expect Killian to do this for her. He looked into her eyes and she waited for his response.

"I'm so angry. She made me come all the way here just to show up her face"

"There was not even business to be made?" she asked feeling angry herself

"I guess there was, but I didn't stay to listen to her. I don't want to have anything to do with her, if she really wants to work with us, she'll have to work with Will…I won't…I don't want to…" he was fuming, and she was feeling it herself. She knows the story, when he met her, Milah was Neal's father girlfriend, they had an affair and eventually she left Gold for him. But soon enough she found another victim, some rich guy who put his eyes on her and she left Killian telling him how much he wasn't enough for her. She broke his heart and Killian didn't handle heartache too well, he became a rebel and went against the rules, and didn't have another girlfriend until Emma.

"You know what? Let's forget about her, she didn't bring us here for nothing because we wanted to come and we have plans. We are going to have fun and we are not going to give her power over us…Ok?" she asked with a smile and Killian visibly relaxed.

"You are right, love. I have everything I need standing right in front of me" he said with a sincere smile. She touch his face and remembered the gift.

"By the way, we have a gift for you" she said walking excitedly to the bags. She took a small box from it and stood in front of him again, he looked surprised.

"Who is we?" he asked confused. And she chuckled.

"I don't know if you noticed, but there are two people standing in front of you right now…well one is standing and the other one is floating inside me" she explained and he smiled wider.

"How could I forget?" Emma put the little box in front of him "You shouldn't have"

"I wanted too, I really hope you like it" he took the small box looking as a little boy when is gifted a candy. He opened the small box and found the small sword in it.

"For my necklace?" he asked looking into her eyes with that beautiful happy smile of his. Emma nodded, he stood and went to the bathroom to retrieve the necklace.

"I know the necklace is gift from your brother, but I couldn't resist when I saw the sword" she said while he was putting the pendant into the necklace.

"Is perfect, Emma" he put the necklace on, and the two pendants looked as if they were made to be together "Now I'm more of a pirate, I have my own sword" he said pulling her into his arms hugging her tightly.

"See, now you can stab ants with it" she said and the both of them laughed.

Everything will be just fine, as long as they are together, they can fight the world.

* * *

A/N: Hello my friends...I feel I've been apologizing way too much after every chapter I post, because is taking me a very long time to update. But this time I have a really good excuse, I move from my home counry to another one miles and miles away, so life's been busy. Adapting to a new city, the way people speak the same language as me but so differently so I've been learning new ways to call things at. So I'm more settled so I hope I can update sooner. I really like this story so don't think I forgot about it. Thanks for reading, and let me know how you feel about it!


	14. Chapter 14

**Killian.**

They ended up having an amazing weekend together in New York. They tried not to buy too many baby things, but they did anyway. Emma fell in love with a crib, she said it was ok, she can find another one in Boston, but by seeing almost little hearts on her eyes Killian couldn't just walk away from the store. They bought the crib, delivery is not a problem when your business are shipping boats. So now, they are checking out off the hotel, well he is, and Emma ran to the bathroom once again, something she is doing quite often this days. He just checked them out and thanked the girl on the desk when he heard Milah's voice.

"Darling, you look even better the second time around" he rolled his eyes and frowned.

"What are you doing here?" he asked feeling and sounding annoyed.

"I couldn't let you leave upset. We need to talk"

"I have no time for talking, we're taking a flight quite soon"

"We?...Oh the mysterious girlfriend" she said rolling her eyes and that really pissed Killian off.

"She is not mysterious"

"Yet, I don't see her anywhere" she replied annoying Killian.

"I don't know what your intentions are, love. But I'm not staying around to find out" he said and turned around to walk away from her, he needed to get Emma and himself as far away from that woman as he could.

"Oh come on, don't be childish" she said grabbing him by an arm, he stopped and removed not too kindly his arm from her grasp and took a big breath when the woman stood in front of him. Maybe he was being childish, maybe he should be mature enough to let her talk and say No to whatever her business proposal is. But he just didn't want to do it. He wanted to find Emma and fly back home and keep living his happy life with her.

"Everything ok, babe?" he heard Emma's voice to his right and he turned around placing a smile on his face, he need it to walk away from this situation as fast as he can, and looking upset wouldn't help.

"Yes, love. A car is waiting for us outside" he said trying to ignore the very existence of Milah.

"Blonde? Really?" Milah asked and when he looked into her face she was smirking. In that time Emma came closer and stood next to him, and he saw the moment Milah noticed the baby bump, it was obvious from the direction of her eyes and the expression on her face.

"Oh my…You are going to be a father…I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it with my own eyes" she said giggling, then she hold up her hand for Emma to took "Hello, I'm Milah. I'm sure you've heard of me. I have to admit I don't even know your name, dear" her smile was so sarcastic and strange that all Killian wanted to do was puff them far away from there.

"Emma, my name is Emma" Emma looked into his eyes for a second having a silent conversation.

"Oh Emma, dear. I'm sure this baby was an accident, because I could imagine this man being everything and anything but a father. He said quite often how much he didn't want to have a child" Milah said looking totally amused. He noticed Emma's cheek blushing in anger and giving a weird look at him.

"What are you doing? Emma and her son are none of your business…so, excuse us. We need to go" he said grabbing Emma's hand and when he saw Emma's face he notice something was wrong, he didn't know what it was until Milah spoke again.

"Her son?" she asked and started laughing "Is not even yours?" Killian swore if this was a man he would have punched him right at this moment. But all he decided to do was to keep moving and leave. He pulled Emma gently and started moving, she followed him. The taxi driver and the bell boy were loading their suitcases in the trunk of the car, and they sat inside. Milah didn't follow them and he was relieved. He tried to talk to Emma in the drive to the airport but she said 'not now' and gave a look to the driver.

After checking in for their flight and sitting to wait for the time to aboard he got his chance, Emma was brooding and he was nervous "Love, I'm really sorry for what happened in the hotel" he said and Emma ignored him.

"You had a very interesting taste in women" she said without even looking at him after a few minutes of silence.

"The worst" he admitted. Emma didn't say anything else and he was panicking now, he was aware and afraid of Emma's mood swings and if this was one of those fueled by what Milah just did, they were up for an unpleasant flight.

"Emma, please. Don't let her get into your head…She's not worth it" he said and when she finally turned her face to see him, he knew maybe he should shut up and wait for a better moment to talk.

"Me and My son are going to the bathroom, excuse us" she said and gave him a tight smile before she stood up and walked towards the closest bathroom. And then he knew what the problem was, his poor choice of words when they walked away from Milah.

Yes, he said "Emma and her son", but what did she want him to say exactly? She's the one telling everyone she can that he is not the father, he is a mere bystander apparently and he's been resenting it. And now that he said what she usually says, it's wrong. Really? He was developing a headache faster than he thought it was possible. A few minutes later Emma got back and sat down two sits from him, placing her purse in the middle. Killian looked at her closely and she ignored him.

"What are you doing?" he asked. She looked into his eyes.

"I'm sitting" she said and turned her eyes back to the front with an annoyed expression. She wanted to be mad, well he can play the same game. He didn't understand why she was so upset. Ok, Milah said something mean and he'd apologized if she let him. But he did the best he could to take her away from the mean woman, why was she allowing Milah to ruin their perfect weekend?

They didn't talk again, and a few minutes later the airplane was boarded, she couldn't put her purse between them this time, they were sitting together and it was it. He hoped she cool off by then, so he took her hand in his and he felt when she tried to remove it, and he only hold it a bit tighter "Why are you mad?" he asked and Emma looked intently into the front seat "I can't believe you are going to let that woman ruin our weekend"

"Did you really tell her often that you don't want to be a father?" she asked looking finally into his eyes.

"I did" he answered almost in a whisper, his jaw clenching and his body tensing. Emma's expression was surprised for a second then her eyes moved their attention to her lap "That doesn't mean that that's what I believe now" he said trying to fix what he just said.

"Maybe you do, maybe you think that because you love me you can do this…But Killian, is a baby, and is going to be here soon. He is going to take most of my time and attention, he is going to make a mess on your loft and your life. You need to think about that"

"Emma, please. Have I ever made you feel as if I don't want to do this with you?" he asked taking one of her hands.

"Maybe now you think you want to…but you...you don't even talk as if you are a part of this with me" she said looking defeated and sad.

"Bloody hell, woman. You are the one who keeps telling everyone I'm not the father, God forbids I do the same" he responded feeling frustrated. But he didn't accomplish much with his outburst. Emma frowned and gave him an angry look.

"I don't want to talk anymore" and after that she laid her head on her seat and closed her eyes.

 **Emma.**

After closing her eyes she heard Killian calling her name softly, but she really didn't want to talk so she ignored him. She's been so happy and in love that she didn't see what was right in front of her, and after giving it a bit of thought she realized that she never asked him, she never asked him if he wanted to do this with her, if he was ready to be a father to her baby. Because let's face it, if he is going to live with him and watch him grow, teach him stuff, he is going to be a father figure for her son. Everything happened so fast, she didn't have a chance to ask the most important question "Killian, do you mind being a father of sorts for this baby?"

She understands that he loves her, but she also can see clearly now, the only reason he is doing this is because he is in love. One day not so far from today he is going to realize how difficult having a baby is, and he might see everything from a different perspective.

In her head they are already a family, and to hear him say "Emma and her son" hurt, a lot. Yes she keeps giving him an out every time someone says something about him being the father, but is because she is scare of saying otherwise and scaring him away. But until now, he never ever separated himself from her and the baby like that. And what makes it worst is the fact that it was to his ex girlfriend to whom he said it. To this woman who has power enough over him to make him as upset as he was yesterday.

They didn't say a word to each other all the way back home. And Emma encountered then another situation, there was nowhere to run, she couldn't just take her purse and go back to her apartment because she didn't have an apartment anymore. She glance a peek at Killian when they entered the loft and he looked tense and he was frowning, he was obviously mad at her and she was mad at him, now they have to sleep together, wonderful.

She saw him sit down unceremoniously on the couch, leaning his head down and closing his eyes, and somehow he was still frowning, and that brought a new wave of frustration all over her. So she walked into the bedroom and went to bed, she didn't realize how tired she was until her head hit the pillow, she went down almost immediately. This baby loves sleeping.

When she opened her eyes again the first thing she noticed was that it was dark outside, the second thing was that she was covered with a blanket she doesn't remember putting on top of herself so she turned her attention to the other side of the bed where Killian should be and it was empty. She got up and went to the bathroom, put on pajama pants and one of Killian's t-shirts, hers weren't exactly fitting her right now. Then she walked out to the living room. She wanted to go out there and fetch him, hug it out and forget about the mean woman who turned them into each other, sleeping cooled her off, what she need it right now was one of Killian's hugs.

But what she found in the living room was emptiness and silence. Killian was nowhere. She walked to the table where they put their keys and Killian's were missing, so he was out. She frowned " _Just perfect, for the first time in my life I want to be grown up and he disappears_ " she thought. She looked for her cellphone inside her purse and when she finally found it the first thing she noticed that got her worried was the time, almost midnight, and she had no calls or messages. She thought about calling him but decided she wouldn't, if he wanted to get away from her she'll let him.

 **Tink.**

"This is ridiculous, I thought you became a grown man with a family so I didn't have to spend a Sunday night picking you up from the floor of a bar" Tink complained.

"Well love, to be fair you didn't pick me up from any floor" Killian argued back trying to get up from his stool and failing completely, falling to the floor awkwardly.

"Say again?" Tink asked raising an eyebrow, watching Killian getting up from the floor chuckling, the man was wasted, but she knew him enough to not pick him up, he'll find it insulting "Where's Emma and what did you do?" she asked crossing her arms under her chest.

"Last time I saw her she was blissfully sleeping, so I didn't want to call my pregnant girlfriend to deal with her drunk boyfriend, that's what friends are for" he explained pointing at her, his accent was worst when he drank, but Tink has saw him drunk so many times before she kind of understands him now.

"Car keys" she asked him frowning and he complied by giving her the keys "What did you do? You wouldn't be here wasted unless something happened"

"Oi…So you know, I did nothing. I was being my handsome lovely self when Emma accused me of not wanting to be a father to her child" he said trying to sound nonchalantly but his eyes said otherwise.

"Ok…come on" she said grabbing him by one of his arms and after checking with the bartender if he had already paid she took him out to his car. When they were sitting inside she talked again "So do you?" he looked at her confused "Are you ready to be a father?"

"I don't think anyone ever feels ready to be a parent. But if your question is if I want to be one, my honest answer is I didn't even know I wanted it so badly until…well until my girlfriend got knocked up by some other guy" he said the last thing and started laughing, Killian becomes a silly person when he drinks, and by all the efforts he was making to sound happy and funny she knew he was hurting "Do I do something to make people think otherwise? Because everyone seems to be asking the same bloody question".

"You don't, you are a standard all annoying father to be, talking nonstop about baby things" she said smiling "Should I take you home now?" he smiled back with a sad expression on his face.

"I don't know how to convince her, she's so stubborn"

"Well, getting drunk in a bar is not a good way to start, buddy" she said starting the engine.

"Let's go somewhere else, I need to feel less drunk when I get back home" he said putting on his seatbelt.

"Granny's?" she asked remembering they are open 24 hours on weekends. She saw Killian nodding and put the car on drive.

They arrived to the diner and sat in the only available booth, she looked at the time, it was almost 1 a.m. She ordered a black strong coffee for Killian and a hot cocoa for herself, this was a new tasted acquired after spending so much time with August and Emma, the both of them had a thing for hot cocoa. Killian was quiet and looking thoughtful so she let him to his thoughts whatever he wanted to discuss he'll bring it up.

"I saw Milah in New York" he said after a few minutes and Tink was expecting for him to discuss anything but Milah, her eyes went wide and her expression showed how worried she was now.

"Is all of this about Milah?" she asked thinking ' _please say no'_.

"Of course not" he said indignant and she felt relieved "It's just she said something to Emma, she's the one who planted this idea in her head that I don't want to be a father"

"So Emma had the unpleasant honor to meet her" Killian nodded "Go home Killian, you shouldn't have left in the first place"

"We were out of rum" he said smiling sadly she mirrored his smile.

"You are right, Emma is stubborn. Until now you have had to prove yourself to her, and it works. So, keep doing that…she's a non believer, she lacks hope, and she needs to see to believe. So show her, show her how badly you want to be a father to her child, how badly you want to have a family with her"

"Thank you, you are a good friend" he responded.

"Of course I am…Do you know I left a very handsome writer lying on my bed just for you?" she added and the both of them started laughing.

Killian looked less drunk already, and after going to the bathroom to wash his face and drinking a very strong coffee he was as good as new, well not exactly, but getting there. She drove him back to his home and drove back to hers in his car. He lent her his car "Is the least I can do for all your trouble" he said.


	15. Chapter 15

**Killian.**

He walked into their home, trying to make as little noise as possible. The last thing he wanted to do was to wake Emma up. He went straight to their bedroom and saw Emma sleeping, he wanted to jump into bed with her and surround himself with her smell and her body warmth but he thought better and went to the bathroom to take a bath.

Feeling and smelling clean he walked to the bed. He didn't care if she was still mad at him, he needed her so he went under the cover and surrounded her body with his from behind placing a hand over her belly. He relaxed when he felt Emma placing one of her hands over his, so he closed his eyes. Tink was right, he shouldn't have gone out, everything he needed was right here.

The next time he opened his eyes it was obviously morning, the room was bright, painfully bright. He covered his face with a pillow, the little exposure he had to daylight gave him a headache, then he heard it again, the noise that woke him up, his phone was ringing insistently, only god knows for how long.

"Bloody hell" he said out loud and put aside the pillow that was covering his face. He grabbed the phone from the nightstand, he saw Will's face on the screen "What?" he said taking the call and lying back on the bed.

"Where the bloody hell are you?" the man asked him.

"I pay you a lot of money so you can let me sleep in sometimes, you know?" he said sarcastically not happy of being awakened so rudely. He took a look around, Emma was not around, most likely she was at her job by now.

"It's almost noon sleeping beauty…I just want to know how business went in New York"

"That's not happening, mate" he said and the image of Milah's sarcastic smile appeared on his mind, his headache was back with force. He got up to go and find a pill.

"Really? We were so sure about that one. What happened?"

"I really don't want to talk about it on the phone" he mumbled.

"Are you coming to the office today?" Will asked and Killian thought about it.

"Maybe later, I need to do something first. I'll call you later, mate"

"Ok…bye" the man hang up.

Killian pulled himself up and walked to the kitchen, after finding a pill for his headache, he drank a glass of water and took a look around. The bags and suitcases they brought from New York were still at the same place where they left them. He grabbed a couple of the bags and took them to the baby's room. He put them on a shelf for Emma to put away later, he might try do that now but she will undo whatever he does anyway, she has a way with the baby's room, she'll appreciate more if he just let the bags for her to put the things away later. He grabbed a Pirate theme teddy bear that was sitting on the rocking chair and sat down.

"You see mate, this is the bedroom of my son" He said to the Pirate Bear "Although I can't call him that because no one seems to believe I am capable of loving him or something. I know I'm not the best man around, but I want to try to be that man" he stared at the bear's face "What would you know? You are a Pirate" he said with a faint smile.

After taking a bath he grabbed a cab to Emma's office, he couldn't spend the whole day knowing Emma was upset, because he wants to fix things, whatever it takes. He arrived to the place expecting a not so friendly expression from Emma but she wasn't around. When Elsa, whose desk is next to her's, laid eyes on him she gave him a relieved expression, and he came closer but before he could say a word Elsa talked.

"Thank god you are here…she has a terrible mood, I swear our boss is about to give her early maternity leave"

"I'm sorry, lass. I'm afraid that's my fault" he said with an apologetic smile. Elsa gave him a sympathetic smile.

"She's in the copy room, but she'll be back at any moment" she explained.

 **Emma.**

When she woke up in the morning she found herself using Killian as a pillow, which is not that bad at all, but when she remembered he wasn't home until really late, and she could smell the unmistakably scent of rum on his breath, then she was pissed, again. She made as much noise as she could while dressing up, sitting on the bed with more force than necessary trying to wake him up, just because he looked too peaceful sleeping and she was in no mood to see him smiling happily on his dreams, but nothing. She 'accidentally' kicked very loudly the paper bin, and nothing the man was as good as dead, and that pissed her off even more. So the fact that she couldn't pick a fight with him in the morning made her picked a fight with everyone else who a look at her. She realized she went a little too far when Aurora, the intern, tried to make a copy for her and mistake the paper and brought her something different and she snapped out at her, watching as the girl turned around with tears on her eyes after she pointed out how useless it was to have interns at an office at all. She went herself to make the copy, felling guiltier and ashamed by the second.

When she came back, she noticed Killian in front of her desk before she even looked at him. Yes, she noticed him. Her whole body was tuned up to his, his smell, his energy, she just knew he was there, and she saw a perfect opportunity to release all her stress, he was finally going to hear her. She came closer, put the papers she was holding on her desk, and looked into his eyes "You, wait here" she ordered, he only nodded.

She walked into her boss's office "Regina, I'm taking half an hour off. Is that ok?"

"Please. Miss Swan. Do us all a favor and take the rest of the day off. Tomorrow we'll talk about the proper way to deal with the interns" The woman said and Emma felt bad for what she said to the girl earlier, she knows she fucked up there. She'll apologize right now and tomorrow and every day. She nodded to her boss and went back out, Killian stood up when he saw her approaching but she made a sign with her hand so he sat down again and he did. She walked into the break room where Aurora was making a new pot of coffee.

"Hey…I just…ummm" Aurora turned around to see her and she felt really bad when she noticed how guarded the girl was "I'm sorry about earlier, I was in a bad mood and you didn't deserve it. You do a great job here, and you really help us. I swear is not happening ever again" the girl visibly relaxed.

"It's ok, Emma…I understand" the girl said giving her a reassuring smile and Emma felt even worst.

She said goodbye to the girl and went back to her desk. She could feel Killian staring at her every move, when she gathered her stuff she looked into his eyes again "We are leaving" he nodded again. They walked out and she kept walking.

"Where are we going, love?" he asked

"You are taking me to a coffee shop that's around the corner and buying me a huge cup of hot cocoa" she said as fact.

"As you wish" he said and she tried very hard not to smile.

After they ordered silence came upon their table. She was waiting for him to begin, but apparently she was being more intimidating than she thought, so she started the conversation "So, how was your night out?" she asked with a tight smile.

"It was not…Emma, I'm sorry I went out last night without even a text. I know I shouldn't have"

"Yeah, you seemed to forget you don't live alone anymore. Just imagine you wake up in the middle of the night and I'm nowhere to be found, not a message, not a call or a voice mail, nothing…just picture yourself in that scenario"

"I'm sorry. When I went out I thought you wouldn't even notice…"

"Oh, right…because the pregnant woman who goes to pee like 10 times in the night wouldn't notice" she said interrupting him.

"I know how it sounds, I was upset and I wanted a drink and I thought I'd be out for a few minutes, then I went to the bar and…"

"You are really not helping yourself right now" she interrupted again "Is this how it's going to be? One night I'll wake up and you won't be there because you craved rum?" the waiter brought their order and Emma asked him to put hers to go.

"You know very well that's not what happened" he said when the waiter left with her cocoa.

"Explain to me what happened" she demanded.

"What happened was, you doubting me once again about the baby. Am I fit to be a father or not, Swan? I need to know because I'm really confused right now of how you feel about it" Killian stated obviously frustrated.

"How can you be confused about it?" she asked slowly frowning more in confusion than frustration.

"You became mad at me because I implied to someone that I'm not the father when you tell everyone who asks and who doesn't that I had nothing to do with it. So excuse me if I'm a bit confused about it. Because I do my best here, I want to be with you two but you need to start including me in your little family" He stated with passion and Emma felt as if someone threw a bucket of water all over her head. He was right.

"Don't you see? You are not a part of my family….You are my family, Killian" she stated looking into his eyes.

"Really?" he asked sounding surprised, and she hated it, she hated that she never let him feel included. She's been excluded her entire life, and the only person who made her feel part of something she was making him feel out of it, it was not fair. Tears filled her eyes, because that happens a lot lately.

"I can't remember how life felt without you in it. You came into my life like a wrecking ball, you demolished everything I thought it was real and gave me real feelings, a real relationship, a love that feels and is real and a real home" she took a breath to try and keep at bay the tears "To realize now that I've been making you feel…excluded, it breaks my heart…I'm so sorry" a single tear rolled through her face and she cleaned it quickly.

"Oh, love. I have always known that every time you explained to someone how I was not involved in your pregnancy you were not trying to be mean or anything, but as it happened more and more often I started to resent it and the fault I carry here is that I never said anything, and I should have. So don't apologize, we were both fools who were not communicating properly"

"You are right. I should have asked if you minded that people assumed you are the father, but I didn't know how and I did what I thought was best. Even though in my head you are" she said timidly and she could swear Killian's eyes sparkled.

"I don't mind, in my head I am too" he said smiling and grabbing one of her hands.

They finished their drinks at the coffee shop. Emma drove him to his office, he said that he'll go by the office for a few minutes to talk to Will, and he'll be home soon. Tink would return his car in a few minutes at his work so he'll have a way to get back home. She drove back home with a smile on her face, feeling relieved that everything was a misunderstanding, and feeling silly by letting it go this far by not talking to him, so she vowed she'll do her best to have better communication in their relationship in the future.

She got home, took a bath, probably Killian would be home in an hour. So after the bath she went to the baby's room, where she found all the bags with the things they bought for the baby in New York. And she put them on a laundry basket after removing tags and prices, she'll wash everything before keeping it away. She loaded the washing machine and walked out to the kitchen, she instantly noticed how it was raining pretty hard outside, she was not a fan of rainy days, she always found them grim.

She called August to find some company in the gloomy afternoon. After talking with him for a long while she noticed is been more than two hours, and Killian hadn't even text her, so she called him but it went straight to voice mail. That was not usual behavior, he always answers the phone, he went out last night but she was sure if she had called he would had answer. She waited another fifteen minutes to call Will, and she was getting really impatient now. Will said Killian left more than an hour ago, so he should be home by now, one of the reasons he picked this loft was the location, it was close to his work, 20 mins away with terrible traffic, with rain and traffic maybe 30 mins. Where was he? She called Tink next and she said that she returned the car and Killian drove her home, he should be home by now.

Emma was moving her leg up and down so fast in a nervous frantic move. She kept checking her phone, the rain got even worse, she could see it in the huge windows. She suddenly felt the now familiar press on her bladder, she needed to go to the bathroom again. When she was about to leave the bathroom to go back to the couch she heard her phone ringing, she went as fast as she could to grab it.

"Hello" she said answering quickly after checking it was an unrecognized caller.

"Hello, is this Emma Swan?" she heard the voice of a woman asking her and she was filled with dread in a second, she closed her eyes before answering, praying silently everything was ok "I've got you as an emergency contact for Mr. Killian Jones, he's been in a car accident"

She sat on the couch grabbing with one hand the phone tightly while listening to the woman, and holding protectively her belly with the other.


	16. Chapter 16

Emma.

How did she get to the hospital? Well, she remembers it as flashes, she got in her car, she remembers it was really difficult to watch the road with so much rain, but she got there, her ears where pulsing, and she repeated to herself like a mantra "he'll be fine". Now sitting in the waiting room soaking wet she is well aware of how angry this would make Killian, how irresponsible she was about driving on the rain in that state of consternation.

At some point she called Tink, she doesn't really remember if she was driving or if she was at home still when she called, all she knows is that she did because Tink and August came in running to the hospital waiting room a few minutes after her, asking questions; questions she was trying to answer but apparently she was babbling, because even when in her head she was explaining soundly, in reality she was a sobbing mess. August hugged her tightly and Tink was consoling her with soft pads on the back, she hadn't cried at all until this moment when she saw familiar faces and all the emotions rolled all over her, but when she caught a glance at the scared expression on Tink's face she realized she needs to explain to them what was going on. She took a few deep breaths and tried her best to calm down.

"He is in surgery. His left hand is broken, they are trying to fix it…" she took another deep breath "he has some broken ribs, small cuts and lacerations" as she explained she understood it could be worst, but to know he is in surgery right now is scarier than anything that she'd ever experienced before.

"I am sure he'll be fine" August reassured her and she nodded. Then she took a look at Tink and the expression in her face was so terrified, she pulled herself out from August embrace and hugged Tink tightly.

"He just left me at home, he was fine" said Tink softly.

"I know, he'll be fine" she said pulling herself enough from the hug to look into Tink's eyes. It was easier to be strong when you are trying to stay together for someone else.

So the longest two hours of her entire life went on, until finally a doctor approached them calling the family of Killian Jones. Tink hold her hand tightly as they stood up to listen what the doctor had to say "Mrs. Jones." said the doctor as soon as he looked at her baby bump, and she didn't even tried to correct him "The damages were concentrated on his left side. His hand was terribly broken, we tried our best to remake it, I don't think the movements will be the same anymore, he will regain some movements on it but time will tell with therapy. But he's fine, he'll be taken to his room in a few minutes, he'll probably sleep for the rest of the night. You'll be able to see him in a few minutes, one of the nurse will let you know" Emma nodded, and the two women hugged when the doctor left.

"He'll be fine" she said with a smile. She knows Killian is right-handed, so what if he can't use his left one the same way anymore? He is alive and he will be fine.

Almost an hour went by, and Emma was getting impatient about seeing Killian. While they waited, the waiting room filled up with all of their friends. David and Mary Margaret came in with coffee for all of them. Will and Belle came in bringing snacks, and Emma couldn't even consider eating.

Finally, a nurse approached them, and announced that Emma could go see Killian, on the way she explained Killian was still asleep, and that Emma should keep in mind that he will look worse than he really was. But even with this warning right before she entered his room she gasped when she finally saw him. He was lying on the bed, eyes close and his left hand was hanging from a weird structure on top of him. There were cuts and bruises everywhere she looked, he had a deep cut on his left cheek with a couple of stitches on it.

When she was right beside him she didn't know if touching him was ok, so she hesitated. The nurse that came in with her and was now checking on his medication told her it was fine to touch him, she just needed to be gentle. Tears filled up her eyes, and the talked again "You are going to be parents soon" the girl said happily, Emma looked at her and looked back at Killian, a tear finally escaped one of her eyes "Hey, he's going to be fine… My name is Ashley, the worst part is over. Be relieve it was just his hand. You'll be welcoming a baby to the world together soon enough. Now touch him, and talk to him, I'm sure he needs it" Emma nodded, and touched his hair gently. The nurse, Ashley, left the room and Emma found her words then.

"Hey… I'm here. Everyone's here. I need to see your beautiful eyes again, so please wake up soon" she caressed his face on the places where there were no wounds. She looked at his hand, it was covered in so many layers of bandages that you couldn't see its real form.

After a few minutes Ashley got back in the room, she explained that he was going to be sedated all night long, she should go back home, have a good night sleep and get back in the morning but she wasn't convinced that was a good move, so when she got back to her friends and explained that she was staying the whole night at the hospital waiting room everyone complained, and everyone offer to stay the night there if that made her feel better. They were using the pregnancy card on her and she hated it. In the end Mary Margaret said that it was useless for her to stay all night if he was going to be asleep, that she needs to rest so in the morning she'll have energy to be with him when he wakes up, and she couldn't beat that logic.

August and Tink got back with her to the loft, and she knew that August was staying the night because he knew her well enough; if he doesn't stay she will get back to the hospital. August made dinner, grilled sandwiches for the three of them. And after it, Tink said goodnight and went back home, leaving her boyfriend behind as she predicted. Emma came back to the living room with a couple blankets and a pillow and sat on the couch next to her friend.

"Do you think you are going to sleep well or do I need to make you a soothing tea?" he asked

"Soothing tea" she responded while she laid her head on the back of the sofa, closing her eyes "I don't want to go to bed without him" she complained.

"I know, but you have to. He would kick my ass if I let his family to sit a whole night long" Emma chuckled at his words.

"Yes, he would"

Emma got back to bed after the promised tea. But this time she slept on Killian's side of the bed.

 **Killian.**

Something was wrong, very wrong. His whole body hurt, his head was pounding, he was trying to open his eyes but was finding some resistance, or he didn't have energy enough to do it, he heard Emma's voice, she said "good morning" he felt a soft kiss on his temple, he tried to open his eyes again but it was too draining, then everything went dark.

He doesn't know how much time passed since the last time he kind of woke up, but he felt the fogginess of sleep leaving him, the pain on his body felt distant, he felt fingers grabbing his right hand and all his thoughts went to Emma, so he opened his eyes slowly. He didn't recognize the place where he was at, he tried to move his left hand but found some resistance and suddenly a deep pain cursed through all of him, someone gently grabbed his left wrist and stopped his movements, he followed the arm trying to find a face, and it was when he saw her, she was saying something, so he tried to focused on her, on her words "it's ok. Don't move, please. You are going to hurt yourself" she looked so worried that he stopped his movements, and she was right, everything got better when he did.

"Emma" he said or tried to say, he's throat was so sore, as if he haven't tasted water in a week. She smiled at him and asked him to wait a second, he panicked when she disappeared from his vision, instinctively he tried to move to keep looking at her, but a deep pain on his left rib cage stopped him. He heard her call someone and saw her appear back in a few seconds "Water" she nodded but when she tried to move away The panic returned, he couldn't help it; this time he pulled on her fingers and she noticed. She looked at his hand and then to his eyes, and he knew she understood his urgency.

"The water is right here, I don't even have to walk away but I need to turn around to take it" she explained and he nodded softly. A woman walked in and ran to check the machines and who knows what, he wasn't really paying attention to her, his attention was on Emma's back. He still wasn't sure where he was, all that matters was that Emma was there.

After a few sips of water his throat felt much better and he got to ask the most pressing question "What happened?"

At that moment a doctor came into the room and answer his question "You got into a car accident Mr. Jones. We had to do surgery on your hand, I'm Doctor Whales" the doctor explained looking at his hand, he already noticed it was covered with bandages, hanging in front of him "You also have a few broken ribs, it seems they are healing properly. Do you remember what happened at all?" the doctor asked approaching and looking into his eyes with a tiny flashlight.

"Umm…I remember I was driving. Then I woke up here" he answered when the doctor stopped harassing him, and went to check the metal folder on the foot of his bed.

"It will come to you, the brain tends to suppress traumatic experiences" the doctor said staring at the folder.

"How is my hand?"

"The surgery went well, we fix it the best we could. You will need therapy to gain some control over it, but I got to be honest with you Mr. Jones the movements won't be the same, you might not be able to use it anymore as you used to" the doctor said and the room went quiet, he felt Emma's hand grabbing his right hand tighter or maybe he was the one who tighten his grasp "You'll be here for a couple more days, tomorrow I'll come myself to check on your hand…have a nice day" he said as a goodbye, he heard Emma thanking the man, he was staring straight at his hand.

"At least is not the right one" he heard Emma say softly and he looked up at her. She looked tired, with dark bags under her eyes, but that didn't diminish her beauty.

"How are you?" he asked with a little smile, hoping to comfort her. She returned the smile.

"Better now that you're looking at me. I was so scared" she confessed almost in a whisper. And he felt horrible, he seems to be making her feel anything but happy lately.

"I'm so sorry I didn't get to come home last night" he apologized, she smiled widely with teary eyes.

"It's alright… But, try not to do this again, I don't want to live without you. I… I love you" she finally admitted and for a moment he forgot where he was, the pain that was pulsing disguised by medicine, the fact that he might not longer have use for his left hand… All he could focus was her beautiful eyes, her perfect little smile, the touch of her hand. The room disappeared.

"I love you too".


	17. Chapter 17

**Emma.**

It's been two months since Killian went out of the hospital, a month of him doing physical therapy and getting frustrated by not making any progress, even when he's been warned about it, told to be patient. He was constantly on pain, because he was pushing himself too hard, and his frustration was proportional to how much Emma's belly grew. Right now, Emma is waiting for him to get out from physical therapy, waiting patiently in the car, thinking of a way to cheer him up, she was running out of ideas.

She saw him walked out of the building and she smiled widely, happy to see him as always, but when she really noticed his face her smile faltered, he was clearly in one of his moods, again. He noticed the car and walked straight to it, opened the door and sat next to her "Hi" she said with a little smile.

"Hello" he answered not even looking at her. She frowned slightly and started the car.

"How was therapy?" she asked and even when she knew it may be the wrong question right now, she really wanted to know. He looked at her with a frown on his face.

"I had so much fun" he answered sarcastically.

"Hey! I really care" he only turned to look out his window. Emma tried again another approach "I was thinking we order Chinese and sit in front of the fire, what do you say?"

"I'm really not in the mood. You should leave me at my office, I'll come home later" he said coldly and she felt awful, since she met him he never rejected her before so bluntly.

"Really? I just came for you… What am I? Your Uber" she said pissed. She would have come to pick him up even if he only wanted a lift to his work place, but she was expecting to spend some time with him. With all his brooding lately, she really missed him, missed them, the way they were before of this car accident. And to be honest she was getting bigger and bigger and she was feeling a bit self conscious, Killian hasn't made a move on her this past two months and when she did and things seemed to heat up, he looked uncomfortable and used his hand as an excuse.

"I didn't ask you to come. You came and texted me you were outside" he mumbled. Her temper flaired, but she has learned to keep it down, she took a deep breath, once, twice.

"Yeah, silly me. I'll drive you wherever you want to go, then I'll leave you alone" she said feigning understanding.

The rest of their drive was silent, and she was using all of her might not to cry, she was so upset, all she wanted to do was cry it out. They arrived at the docks, she parked close to his office, and didn't turn to say goodbye, she just look up right in front of her. He opened the door but hesitated to go out, finally he sighed.

"Look…I'm sorry, I don't feel good. I'm not good company right now" he explained softly and she only nodded without looking at him. A few seconds passed and finally he got out of the car. When the loud noise of the door closing reached her, she closed her eyes for a few seconds. But before she started crying on this empty parking lot, she opened her eyes again and started her drive home.

She entered the loft and took a look around, it felt cold, lonely, sad. She envisioned a different ending for the day. She find herself alone most of the time now, even when Killian was at home he always was doing something elsewhere, usually at the baby's bedroom. He's been having a terrible war with the baby crib they bought at New York. Everytime he sat down to work on it, trying to ensemble it, it became a lost battle, it was a terribly hard work with just one hand. He was not accepting any help with it, each time she offered her help or suggested calling one of their friends Killian ended up offended and upset, one time they screamed nonsense to each other, so she'd learned to leave him to it, he's been making little progress with it.

They are now far away from the happy couple they were, but she understands is hard for Killian to get use to live a life with just one hand that works. But she finds herself crying a lot lately, sometimes she locks herself in the bathroom until she calms down.

Their intimacy has suffered tremendously, at first it was because of his recovery, now is because of his frustration, when he instinctively tries to touch her with his left hand and he ends up hurting himself or…she wasn't sure, maybe he might feels she is disgusted by it, that be stupid, she's been the one who changed his bandages every day, with love and care. Now she's felling and looking huge, heavy, swelled up, and as sexy as a gigantic elephant, she has lost her confidence, so she'd stop trying.

It was getting dark and there was no sing from Killian, from the mood he had earlier she could predict he'd be home as late as he can, hoping she is already asleep when he gets home. Then an awful though hit her hard, so hard that her heart started pounding rapidly with the idea. 'Killian doesn't want to be around her anymore'.

How couldn't she saw it before, was she this in love that she was ignoring every rejection? It was there, in his eyes every time he looked at her, or wasn't looking at her, he was avoiding her eyes a lot lately. She still believes, or wants to believe this is all about his hand and his pain and frustrations, but it was still there, he doesn't want to be around her, maybe he didn't think she could help him, he only sees in her another problem to take care of, and he's not up to it right now. The tears returned with force.

What was the point of being with someone who doesn't want you around, who doesn't want to spend any amount of time with you, who comes home late at night hoping you'll be sleeping already, who leaves too early in the morning or doesn't wake up until you are gone, who gets upset because you decided to go for him to his therapy. And the most important question of all, why was she letting another man to make her feel alone and rejected?

Soon her baby will be here, and this is not the environment she wants to raise him. She doesn't want this for her son. And she won't make Killian even more uncomfortable at his own home. Maybe he needs space and time to recover without a woman around who's about to pop a baby out of her.

Killian.

Yes, life can and it will get harder. Now he's a fucking cripple who won't be able to hold his son when is born, wonderful. And to make everything more difficult he was ruining his relationship with Emma. He knows he is been cranky and annoyed, and is never because of her, is because of him and everything he can't do now, he can't even touch her properly, he's been trying to ensemble the freaking crib and failing, hating everytime Emma suggested help. He doesn't want help, he wants to be able to take care of his family on his own. He can't even help Emma get the bags from the supermarket, he has to watch his pregnant girlfriend carry many bags when he can only hold a few, and hating her stubbornness, he would make as many trips to the car as he has to, just to not watch her struggle with things she shouldn't be doing, but who can argue with a pregnant Emma Swan. He can't even give her a proper rub on the feet when they are swollen, is stupid and unhelpful with just one hand. He can't even consider making love to her without hurting himself in the process.

And to all the things he can't do now, it adds the way she looks at him every time he disappoints her, every time she tried to seduce him and he excused himself, every time she tries to do something nice and he's not in the mood, like earlier.

He was on a terrible mood already when he received the text that she was waiting for him outside of the hospital, therapy was painful and unhelpful, it's stupid to make therapy if nothing is going to change. Now the woman he should be driving around by now, because that was his plan for this stage of her pregnancy, is driving around her crippled boyfriend who can't help her do anything.

He didn't mean to hurt her feelings and he felt even worst when he noticed he did. Maybe she was better with him out of the way for a while, he'll come home later when she is getting ready for bed, hopefully already asleep, tomorrow he'll make a better effort for her, for them.

When he got home that night Emma wasn't there, it was late, so if she wasn't there maybe she didn't want to be around him tonight, maybe he really hurt her feelings this time whit his attituted. He took his cellphone out and called her. It went straight to voice mail, but he didn't leave one, what was he supposed to say? He texted her.

" _Where are you?"_ he waited a few minutes, no response.

" _I just need to know you are ok_ " he texted again. He knows she left on her own accord, and she is ok somewhere, he just needs confirmation or he'll gone crazy. Most of her things are still there, but her suitcase is missing and probably some clothing.

He sat at the couch, all the lights of the loft off. He feels detached, he knows he did this, and now he is wondering if this is what he was looking forward to happen without even knowing, to push her away, to be alone again to be miserable. His phone finally biped.

" _I'm fine_ " was all her response.

His heart sunk, a knot formed in his throat. He let the dreadfull feelings run through him, he deserves it, he did this. He was playing to be a family man, but this is really who he is, his injury exposed him, and Emma didn't deserve it, it didn't deserve someone like him, broken, unhappy, unable to take all the beautiful things she was offering. He eventually felt asleep right there, sitting on the couch, he is not worthy of their bed.

He woke up the next morning as soon as the sun filled the loft with light. His hand hurt, his back hurt, his heart hurt. But still, he didn't want to do anything about it, why to rush Emma back, he still was a crippled and miserable man. He wants to ask her to come back, to call her and leave a million different voice mails asking for forgiveness, promising things will get better, but she deserves honesty, he can't promise any of that, wherever she is, probably with August or the Nolan's, she's being taken care of, anyone can do a better job than him.

A couple of weeks went by, he barely left the loft, and his drinking when up day by day. Sometimes he heard knocks on the door, maybe Tink, maybe Will, maybe David, he didn't even want to know. Those three names flared up on his phone often, the only one he answered once or twice was Will's because of job, until he asked him to please take care of everything for a few days and he stopped calling. The only reason his phone was on all the time was in the exceptional case Emma wanted to call or text or anything, he'll be there to pick up.

Sometimes in his drunken states he even texted her, little honest sentences, like "I miss you" or "I love you" and even once he texted an "I'm sorry", she never texted back, but it was ok, he didn't want her to text back, he just wanted her to know how he feels. And he wished he could make her promises, but he couldn't. Just typing on his phone was a struggle with just one hand, and it was a sound reminder of his situation.

Now he was out of rum, and he needed more, he needed to feel numb, so he went out to buy a few bottles to last for a few more days. He was gone for maybe an hour, and when he got back he found Emma's yellow bug parked in front of his building, he got anxious and felt relieved he hasn't had a drop of alcohol today. He was unkempt, he haven't shave in maybe a week or even more, he hasn't changed clothes in a couple of days, he was a mess, but he didn't care, he wanted to see her. So he hurried up.

When the elevator opened he found August with a couple of suitcases and a box. The two men looked at each other for a few seconds and Killian's heart felt suddenly so heavy in his chest.

"Hey, man" August broke the silence, Killian moved aside to give space for Emma's friend to move the things he had whit him out of the elevator. Killian looked intently to the suitcases, he couldn't use his words. August put everything down and looked at Killian in the eyes "She's waiting for you upstairs".

Killian took a deep breath and nodded, preparing for what is coming. August gave a last look of pity before the elevator's doors closed. He knew this was going to happen, that's why he's been drinking so much lately, he knows he lost her, but he can't get her back, he is too broken.

He opened the door and found Emma sitting at the kitchen island with a cup of tea, she is so beautiful, she is so perfect, she deserves better, she deserves a whole man.

"Hi" she said softly when she saw him walked in. Oh damn, he should kneel in front of her and asked her to stay, he should hug her to his body and never let her go, but that be selfish, and he loves her too much for that.

"Hello, love" he walked and stood up in front of her, at the other side of the island. That was on purpose, the kitchen island would serve a shield, to keep him from holding her, to allow him to let her go.

"I came to gather my stuff" she said and he nodded. "But I didn't want to run out without you even noticing, you deserve better" a long silence passed.

"I'm sorry, Emma. I'm sorry I couldn't give you everything I promised, you deserve better than me" she was listening intently, until his last statement, it made her frown.

"You don't get to decide what I do or I don't deserve…When you woke up from that car accident I was so happy, so happy that I didn't lose you, that we still have a future together, but I was wrong, I did lose you on that car accident. The man that woke up that day from that surgery is not the man I fell in love with. If you ever find that man again, give me a call. I really may want to talk to him" a lone tear left her right eye and she cleaned it quickly. He didn't know what to say, she couldn't explain their situation better than she did "Maybe if the baby wasn't on the way, I'll stay as long as it takes to bring you back. But I won't put a baby to this situation between us, he needs to be born surrounded by love and light and happiness" Killian looked at down at her bump, to his son or maybe not, he lost his claim on this baby by losing himself, she's right, he's not fit to be anyone's father.

They look at each other for a long while, then she nodded and walked towards the front door, he couldn't resist one last honest confession and before she opened the door he called her name and she stopped, turning around to face him. He walk closer, closer enough to smell the fragrance of her hair, he studied her eyes and knew she was paying real attention to whatever he was going to say next "There's not a day will go by I won't think of you"

"Good" was her answer, then she turned around and left, the door closing worked in a literal and figurative way, it hurts, tremendously. He wished again he could promise her anything to keep her here, but he couldn't lie to her, he doesn't know anymore what he can or can't do. So he let her go and his heart broke, he could feel it breaking in little pieces, he didn't just let Emma go, he let go this son he's been expecting, who he haven't met but already feels as his own, he let go of the only family he had left.

* * *

N/A: I'm back, and I will finish this story, no matter how long it takes. It stayed with me all this time. I was dreading to write this chapter, its the one I know is coming since the beggining, and I hope I made it justice, because it hurted to write it, I swear. I was so into Killian that I felt for him. Hope you ejoy it! I apologizes for my poor sentences sometimes, I'm not an english speaker, so I do my best and hope for you guys to enjoy it!


	18. Chapter 18

**Emma Swan.**

One year has passed, and the emptiness was still alive and residing inside her, the only thing keeping it in check was Henry's smiles. Yes, Henry. That's the name of her beautiful and happy almost eight month's baby. This past year many things have change, she moved, not too long ago, she moved out of the city, if she was going to feel lonely anyways, she could do it anywhere. She haven't heard from Killian, and everyone she knows avoid naming him in front of her, she decided not to ask to anyone, she doesn't deserve to know.

She is aware of the shitty thing she did, leaving him at his lowest, leaving him when he probably needed her the most. Her reasoning back then was to secure a happy environment for the arriving of her baby boy, but who was she kidding, she's not happy, she's miserable. Thank god Henry is unaware of that, he is easy with the smiles, and the only things that upsets him is if she takes too long to feed him.

The day Henry was born, when she held him in her arms it was magical and beautiful and everything other mothers described, but it was incomplete, she couldn't shake the feeling that something big was missing, and she knew what or who was missing in that moment. That night, lying on her hospital bed, after all her friends left she grabbed her phone, she searched for his name on her contacts list, she needed him. Sitting there alone in the dark she realized how selfish she acted, she hoped he'll show up, that Tink or someone would tell him that Henry was born and he'll come to meet him. But he didn't and she can't blame him, because it was then when she needed him to be there she realized what she did, and how wrong she was, because they would have been happier with Killian, she would have been happier with him. After a few minutes of considering it she pressed the call button and it went straight to voice mail, she thought about calling again and leaving a voice mail, but what would she say? "Hey it's me, the selfish bitch who left you a few months ago, I had my baby, you know, the one I told you could raise with me but decided at last minute we were better off without you. I just hoped you could be here to hug me and tell me everything will be allright, the same way I didn't with you. Ok, bye." Because you know anything she said it would sound to him just like that.

The afternoon she went to get her stuff at his place she was so certain she was making the right choice, that she was giving him a chance to heal without worrying about cribs or babies or his huge pregnant girlfriend. She knew he was frustrated about the impending arrival of Henry having his injury; he was being hard to himself and being hard to her in the process. And she thought she was being fair by removing herself for his wellbeing. Being pregnant didn't suit her, her usual emotional turmoil was a hurricane with the hormones.

She still hoped he will show up at any moment the first month of Henry's life, she secretly waited every day for him to knock at the door of August's apartment and bring his beautiful smile to her boy. But he never did, and she understood. She never tried to call again.

August didn't want her to move out, he was barely home, and there was room for the both of them. But Henry grew by the day and his things were everywhere and to be honest what really was driving her away was Tink, she was completely taken by Henry, and Henry by her. The girl was nice enough to her but she knew it was not the same as before, as before she walked out on Killian. She wanted to ask, every time she saw her she wanted to ask about him, she needed to know, she even fantasized once of letting Tink take Henry to him for a while, so they could meet. And there was this time, August went out to get something from the store, Tink was sitting at the couch playing with Henry at her lap. Emma sat in front of her gathering her bravado to finally ask her when the girl talked, looking into Henry's smiling face.

"Henry will always feel as Killian's. I think that's why I love him so much. To me he will always be Killian's son." Tink voice sounded sad and it broke at the end, Emma's eyes filled with tears. Because that's exactly how she felt.

"He should meet him. It's ok if he wants to be in Henry's life, they should meet" Emma said hoping. Tink looked up at her.

"He left, I don't know where he is" she confessed. They look at each other for a few seconds until Henry pulled at Tink's shirt trying to bring back her attention to him.

When it was time to look for her own place, she didn't want to stay in this city anymore, he wasn't here, she had to move on, and she couldn't do that having a memory of him everywhere she looked. She thought about that small town in Maine she visited when she was looking for the twin's father. It was a small but beautiful and peaceful place, she visited the school back then to make sure it was ok for the twins, and she remembers how pretty she found it, and how lovely everyone seemed. It was definitely the perfect environment to raise a kid. Wasn't that the reason she left Killian? To look for that kind of environment, so it made sense. And there was also the fact, that with the budget she could rent a small one bedroom apartment in the city, in this town she could rent a whole house.

So she traveled there before her maternity leave was over, she stayed for a few days with Henry at the Bed & Breakfast. She went to the Seriff's office asking for a job opening for a social worker. The sheriff, a handsome man called Graham Humbert told her she was in luck, he had a post as a deputy, the last one retired of old age, he could give her all the cases associated with her expertise, but she'll have to do all the chores deputy's have, and not worry because that was a small peaceful town, they might be of more use of a social worker than a police officer, and if she was ok with all that then there was a job for her. She explained there were a couple more weeks for her maternity leave and she would love to use it to move into town, he was ok with that. They shook hands and it was set, she had a job. She walked around town with a newspaper in her hand and Henry in his stroller. Looking house after house, until saw a big grey house with white picked fence, this was definitely the house of her dreams, this one was not for rent, it was for sale and she couldn't buy a house, not yet, not just moving into town with a baby, maybe after she established herself, she could considered it, that didn't stop her to walk as often as she could at the street where the big beautiful house was.

Now, she's been for five months living at Storybrooke and loving it enough to stay. The only thing she had against the small town was that everybody knew everyone's business and she wasn't a fan of that, but wherever she went everyone loved Henry so she let the other thing go. Working with Graham was nice, he was a quiet man and it suited her perfectly. She had a couple of night shifts, that meant a couple rounds and going to bed with the cellphone on and high alert of any calls. She also found a wonderfull day care for Henry, lead by a sweet girl called Ashley, she was young but was recently married and has a little baby girl called Alexandra.

David and Mary Margaret visited often, they were falling in love with the town as much as she did, she could see it. But it wasn't until Mary Margaret announced she was pregnant that they confessed their desire to move into town too. So, they were making plans. David was a web developer so he could do his job anywhere. Mary Margaret was a teacher, so whenever she wants to she could find a job for sure.

She guessed she was as happier as she'll ever be, she was healing but not forgetting, and she misses him tremendously, there were nights when she dreamt about him naked on their bed in Boston, having his way with her, those nights she woke up sweating and felling frustrated and more lonely than ever. There were other nights she dreamt him holding him Henry, talking to him showing him the world, those nights she wakes up with tears in her eyes. There also where this nights when he looked at her with hate in his eyes, he walks towards him but she could never reach him. And no matter how sad and empty those nights makes her feel, she rather see his face in her dreams, she rather have him at least there.

Tink wasn't happy at her for taking Henry away, until August and her visited them and they fell in love with the town, they might not be moving anytime soon, but they were making Storybrooke their weekend getaway. And she was ok with that, she loves having August around, giving Henry a family, with her uncle August and her aunt Tink, that's what they call themselves in front of the baby, and she loves it.

Right now they are finishing their breakfast at the town's dinner. Henry's face cover all up in oatmeal, Tink laughing at his antics, and August looking satisfied and happy. The both of them are an odd couple, she wouldn't have guessed they last this long, but they look strong and happy, and she was happy for them. August says he found his muse, and since he met her he can't stop writing, so it was perfect for him. She relates with Tink, she's guarded as someone that's been hurt before, but she's braver than Emma, she doesn't let the past to rule her present as Emma does. And she admires her for that.

When the waitress was cleaning the table Tink cleaned Henry's face and said to him "We should take a stroll down the piers, do you know your dad loves ships?" Emma stopped breathing, she noticed August kicking Tink's down the table and the girl looked embarrassed of probably speaking out loud something she was thinking, her eyes went wide and went straight to Emma's and mumbled an 'I'm sorry'. Tink took her attention back at Henry's, took him out of the baby chair and putting him at the stroller "Ok lad, your uncle August is going to walk you to the piers and mommy and me are going to find you guys there soon, Right uncle August?" she explained to the baby, he probably didn't understand a thing but it was sweet that she explained anyways. August nodded, looked into Emma's eyes expecting for approval and she nodded. The table was silent until August and Henry walked out the door "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have. Soon the baby will understand and I can't say something like that." Tink looked really sorry, and Emma felt terrible, she wasn't mad, she had walk Henry down the pier before and had told him the same thing 'you know your dad loves boats, he owns boats' so who was she to say something.

"Don't worry, that's a habit we both have to leave behind" she confessed. Both of them were silent for a few seconds "Have you talked to him?" Tink look into her eyes way too long, so long that she knew the answer before it came in the form of a nod "How is he?"

"I guess he is fine. He's coming back to Boston" Emma's heart started pounding in her chest so fast she could hear it in her ears "He asked for the baby, he sound surprised when I said he's name" Emma couldn't help a little smile.

"It was on the top of his list of names, he said it was Indiana Jones's name. Which I found ridiculous then, but I couldn't name him anything else" Emma said and her eyes filled with tears, she cleaned one quickly before it ran down her face.

"I sent him a picture of Henry. I thought you'd be ok with that, since you said he could be in his life" Emma nodded, of course it was ok, it was more than ok. She would love to send him twenty pictures of Henry a day. "I was going to tell you, Iater. You know down the piers while August took Henry far enough so we could talk" the both of them smiled.

"Did he ask about me?" she knows she shouldn't ask, she is not even sure she wants to listen to the answer to that, no matter what it was. But she never felt as disappointed as she felt right now when Tink shook her head softly in a negative answer.

"Of course" she said looking at her hands on the table "Tell him he can meet Henry if he wants to, and he can be whatever he wants to him, his uncle, his friend…his father…I know the baby will love him, and Killian is in love with him since the beginning. So, who am I to keep them apart?"

"He would love to hear that."

 **Killian.**

One year, actually 'One year and two weeks' that's how long he's been without Emma. Yeah, he's still counting. She said he should give her a call if he ever found the man she fell in love with, but he can't find him, not without her. Tink said she moved out of town, to another state, probably making sure he can't get near the lad. Henry is gorgeous, looks strong and happy, Tink sent him around 10 pictures and the baby was always smiling happily, and call him crazy but that was a tiny little version of Emma's smile. So he guessed that at least Emma succeeded at giving the wee one a happy environment, so good for them. That's all that matters.

He left town after Henry's birth. He went to the hospital, he couldn't stay away. But he stayed clear of his friends, except Tink. She took him to the nursery when no one was looking and showed him the baby, he didn't have a name yet, his tag said 'Baby Swan'. He couldn't touch him, but he counted his little fingers and saw him sleeping peacefully, so he was content with that.

He finished assembling the baby crib some time ago, it was there accusing him of everything he lost, and the baby he just saw through a glass would never sleep in it. He turned off his phone to avoid Tink. And drank a whole bottle of rum sitting on the rocking chair where Emma was supposed to feed the baby. The next day he decided he needed to be physically away or he'll show up in front of her asking her to take him back, and she has a baby to take care of now, she doesn't need a drunk piece of a man. So he rented a storage room, sent all his things to it, being very emphatic to the moving company to be especially careful with the baby furniture, and took a plane to New York, if he was going to be self destructive he will do it the same way he does everything, grandiosely.

That's how he found himself at Milah's bed often. He took the chance to sign their contract. So everyone got what they wanted, she got him on her bed and he got their business running, he established an office in New York so he's company grew even more. The first time he found himself at Milah's bed, well he fucked her against a desk at her office, he let her seduce him, to be honest he needed to feel something, he felt numb since the last time he saw Emma. He's body reacted to her, of course, the woman is a knock out and he's body remembers what she could do with it, but it felt wrong, when she kissed him it felt wrong so he turned her around and made her bend on the desk just to not look at her face, to not kiss her. As soon as he was inside her, it felt even worst, that was not what he wanted, it felt different, for a moment he hesitated but he noticed Milah trying to turn around and that was worst, so his temper got the best of him, he fucked her hard, he released all of his frustration in every move, and Milah, well she looked happy. When he was about to come he closed his eyes, grabbed her by the hair and pulled her against him, and with his release he asked at her ear "Why…bloody hell…did…you…left?" He wasn't asking her, he wasn't aware he said it out loud. He just felt dirty, unhappy, frustrated and this question was to the blond he saw in his mind when he closed his eyes.

"I'm right here now" Milah answered. And brought him back to the present, he was still buried inside her and this was all levels of wrong. He pulled himself out and closed his pants that were still on his legs, grabbed his shirt from the floor and dressed quickly.

"I need to go" he mumbled and left as soon as he could. That night he took three baths. And he seriously thought about grabbing a plane and kneeling in front of Emma to take him back. But of course he didn't, he was still a crippled, who now fucked the villain of the story, how could he explain that? He went to New York to be self destructive, well he was up to the challenge. Seven months in and his taste for liquor diminished, if he's not drunk he doesn't want to be with Milah, so what was the sense on staying.

He decided to get back, if not to get Emma back at least to meet the baby boy, to ask her to let him be at least a small part of his life. He called Tink, they haven't talk since he left, and she sent him the pictures of the lad. He was so surprised when she told him Emma called him Henry as he wanted, maybe Emma did liked the name but teased him saying it was ridiculous, that was a nice surprise. He didn't ask for her, he didn't know what to ask. He supposes if the baby is this gorgeous and happy, then she is too. So here he is, walking into his old office, the one he gave to Will.

"So the boos is in the da' house" said Will getting up from his chair and walking around the desk to hug Killian. The both of them smiled and gave strong pats on the back of the other.

"So glad to see you mate" Killian said.

"So, do I have to give you back your desk?"

"Not really, you are still running this office. But we may put another desk in here so I can work when I'm here. I still need to figure out some things."

"That's ok mate. We can do that" they talk long about business in New York, Killian bought three more boats, big ones. And they most discuss buying more. He wasn't just fucking Milah in New York, he also worked, a lot.

Now, all he needs to know is how to get to Emma. He needs to talk to her, about the baby, that'll be the only thing concerning him right now. One thing at a time, it's been 8 months she might be seeing someone. He doesn't know because he doesn't want to ask to anyone, he rather not know the answer to that one.


	19. Chapter 19

**Killian.**

Last weekend he returned to Boston, while Tink was visiting Emma and Henry at Storybrooke. They met as soon as she got back, he really missed his friend and being close to her reminded him he was not as alone as he felt all of this months, she invited him to stay at her place, it was a one bedroom apartment but for the time being she will stay at August's, apparently they already talked about this. But the best new she brought with her was that he could meet the baby, Emma was ok with it and that excited him, happy that at least one thing on his life was working for him, he really thought Emma would need more convincing.

Tink also announced him that Mary Margaret and David were moving to the same small town Emma was living, and they've been doing it gradually the last couple of months, so now their new house is ready and they invited the whole gang to celebrate their new beginning. He wondered if Emma did the same, if there was a gathering he didn't know it even happened when she moved away, maybe at one of those nights he spent staring at the stars wondering if Emma was doing the same. He wasn't sure if meeting Emma and the baby again surrounded by all of their friends it was what he wanted, but if that's what Emma needed to be comfortable about it, then he wouldn't say a word. Tink seemed to think it was the perfect occasion for it though.

He took his necklace out of one of his suitcases, he took it off after that afternoon he had Milah for the first time again, he remembered seeing how the little sword touched her back and he couldn't help but keeping it away after that just to avoid that sight again. He sat at Tink's living room and stared at the two pendants, his little sword reminded him of Emma and Henry, the family he wanted but couldn't have. Then the other pendant was there accusing him, he took it and stared at the tiny skull "You know, brother. Even though we didn't work and I am a bit angry at her, you would have liked her. And you would have kick my ass back to Boston to get them back, I left 'the one' walked away without even arguing, without fighting for her" he stared at the pendant for longer, and then he sight. Now all he wanted to do was meet the kid, hopefully get to see him at least once a month, hopefully more often.

He took a ride to Storybrooke with August and Tink, it was a long drive and he contemplated if Emma moved this far away just to get away from him. Suddenly they were driving through Main Street of Storybrooke, what he love the most of this town was how close to the water it was, he had to admit it had its appeal, it seemed to be a quiet nice place to live in, perfect to raise a child. He could definitely see Emma living in a place like this, walking their….her kid around, smiling to people…and image of Emma walking next to a faceless man appeared on his mind and he shook his head to get rid of the thought. They acquired rooms at the Bed and Breakfast, with time enough to freshen up and rest for a little bit, now he was fidgeting nervously checking himself in the mirror once again, he heard a knock on the door, and raked his hair with his fingers one more time.

"Are you ready?" August asked him as soon as he opened the door.

"As ready as I'm going to be" he replied.

"Henry is going to love you" August said giving him a sympathetic smile.

"Is his mother I'm worried about"

The drive to the Nolan's house was short, the property seemed to be placed on a farm, and it look so homey and pretty that it made him smile, the Nolan's will be happy here. The next thing he noticed was Emma's bug parked outside, a yellow car is not easy to miss, and his heart started pounding crazily in his chest.

He wanted to see her, there was not denying that, but he felt guarded, he wanted to meet the baby with all his heart, but about his mother he was more uncertain, he knows that a simple glance at her will bring back all of the feelings he's been keeping safely away.

They get out of the car and Tink looked at him, August walked towards the door, obviously trying to give them some privacy "It's going to be ok, try to be patient, this is Emma we are talking about. I'll be right there, if you need a moment I'll provide it for you, just be your charming self and it'll be ok" She talked and looked so nervous that he smiled.

"You looked more freaked out than me"

"I think I am" she giggled "Let's just walk in, you are finally meeting your boy" she said with excitement.

"Not mine"

"Yeah right, does it work when you say that to yourself?" she asked and he shook his head softly.

They knocked on the door and soon Mary Margaret was in front of them, with her kind and pretty smile, looking genuinely happy to see them there. She hugged him and said encouraging words to his ear, but he wasn't paying attention, because he could hear a baby's laughter in the background, and all his attention went to it. David came out of nowhere and gave him a firm hug, he could barely say hello, he just wanted to keep on bloody walking in already.

"Killian…" he could barely registered someone calling his name "Killian…" he followed the voice and Mary Margaret was staring at him with knowing eyes "Come with me" she said but he looked back where the baby noises where coming from, but Mary Margaret grabbed his arm and talked again "It's ok, you'll see him in a minute" she said and he nodded dumbly, feeling confused, where was she taking him? Why couldn't he just walk the few steps left to see them? "We were talking just before you got here, and Emma prefers some privacy for your first meeting" he nodded, the brunette took him to a room that most likely was David's office. She said something, maybe explained what was the purpose of the room, but he couldn't stop staring at the door, and was focusing his hearing to the outside. Soon there was a knock and Mary Margaret walked to the door opening it and walking out.

And there she was, as beautiful as ever, the woman who owns his heart and soul, yeah he knows how sappy it sounds, but truth nonetheless. She looked different, the last time he saw her, the baby that is now sitting on her hip while she holds him in her arms, was inside her, but he knows her body as if it was his own, and her hips and breast now are fuller, every curve of her body more pronounced. So yes, she looks different, with just one look he could pin point every single thing she has different than before, and she's more beautiful than he remembers. He honestly doesn't know how he will survive this night without holding her tightly to his body.

"Hi" she said but before he could say a thing, the baby made a noise and his attention was with him. The kid was giving him a curious look while biting one of his hands, well probably he doesn't even have teeth, but he seems to be trying to bite his hand off, and it was so adorable.

 **Emma.**

They heard a car parking outside and apparently Emma's heart was trying to jump out of her chest. She took a deep breath and looked around, there was just Mary Margaret and David, but Killian was coming with August and Tink, Belle and Will were supposed to arrive at any moment, what was she thinking? "I can't do this" she announced.

Mary Margaret looked at her with apprehension, and David walked to the window "He is just outside" he said.

"This should have been somewhere private, where Henry could have a moment with Killian…I can't do this to them" she said panicking. There was a full minute of complete stress for the three adults.

"I know" Mary Margaret yelled and all of them, even Henry looked at her "I'll take him to David's office so you can have privacy there"

"They're walking to the door" David announced.

"I guess that's fine" Emma said nervously. There was a knock on the door and the three of them jumped a bit. "Take him to the office" she said to Mary Margaret and the woman walked towards the foyer.

David walked to Henry who looked nervous with the tension the adults had on the room, and started playing with him, making Henry laugh wasn't that difficult, and David was always willing to make a fool of himself for Henry's sake.

She heard his voice, he was actually in the next room, David left and she took his place in front of Henry, she was so nervous that all she could focused on was the baby. She knew how to make him laugh and Henry's laugh was the best tranquilizer Emma Swan could ever have, Henry burst out laughing when she threat him to tickle him , you don't really need to tickle him, he will laugh just with the idea of it, because he was really tickle-ish.

Everyone, except Mary Margaret and Killian walked in, Tink ran to hold Henry in a tight embrace, August did the same to her "You can do this" he whispered to her and she nodded. She's been a year without seeing the man she loves, and he is in a room just a few steps from her, of course she can do it, she wants to do it. But she is uncertain about what happens next, she wish she could ask him to consider her an option again, to give her another chance, that she would never make the same mistake of walking away from him again, but it wasn't that simple. He felt broken and she left him, oh she is so aware of that now, how inconsiderate and stupid she was. If only…

Her thoughts were interrupted by Tink handing her Henry "It is time" the girl said with a little smile and Emma nodded. She walked through the house to the office and knocked as soon as she stood in front of the door, because if she didn't knock immediately she wouldn't do it at all. Henry's expression was curious, for sure he never felt his mom's energy being so tense before. Mary Margaret opened the door and Killian's smell was the first thing she noticed, his own personal odor plus his favorite cologne, and she walked in as if she was bewitched.

There he stood, as handsome as ever, a dress shirt and jacket over a pair of expensive jeans, his stubble well trimmed, his hair standing at different directions, his eyes bluer than she remembers. And the tiny smile he gave her when he saw them walk in made her say "Hi".

Their eyes were stuck on each other for a second, until Henry made a little noise just to call some attention on him, and Killian's face light up completely by Henry, he took a step toward them but stopped himself, and she noticed he didn't know what to do or how to approached them, so she took a couple steps in, standing right in front of him "This is Henry" she said, what else was she supposed to say? She was keeping it simple, as it felt best. Killian's smile was so genuine that she couldn't help but mirror it.

"Hello, lad. I'm Killian, I was looking forward to meeting you" he said and Henry's reply was to pull his arms out, hoping Killian would hold him.

"Do you want to hold him?" she asked, and Killian looked into her eyes again apparently surprised.

"I…yes…but I…" he tried to explain and pointed to his left hand that was covered with a black glove, Emma stared into his hand, she remembers the scars, she doesn't think they look so bad that he should cover it, but she guessed if it made him feel more comfortable then it was fine and when she looked back at his eyes there was an emotion she couldn't name on them "I don't know if that's safe" he added, she gave him an encouraging smile.

"Of course it's safe, I'm sure you wouldn't let anything happen to him" he looked uncertain but he tried to reach for the baby. She helped him until Killian found a comfortable position for the both of them, holding the baby's body with his left arm while his right hand kept him in place by his little back. "It will just need some getting used to" she added and Killian nodded, otherwise his attention was on the baby, who was using his hand caressing his stubble, curious by it.

The sight was so mesmerizing that Emma suddenly noticed she had unshed tears on her eyes, this was the most beautiful view she ever had in her life, and she thought that maybe she wouldn't ever have the chance to enjoy it. And here she was, with her boys right in front of her, well not really "her" boys, but she was indulging herself right at this second.

"I'm sorry I didn't get to meet you before. But I hope we can be friends now" he said and the baby smiled "He is so beautiful, Swan" he said to her though he never stopped watching the baby's face.

"I know, he is amazing. And he is always smiling and happy" she explained cleaning the moist in her eyes.

"I'm glad you got what you wanted. You deserve it" he said finally looking into her eyes.

"Not everything I wanted" she said and he frowned a little in an expression she knows well, an expression that says 'elaborate that thought'. But his phone started ringing, and the moment was lost. He took it out of his pants and cancelled the call "We can give you a moment to take the call"

"No, that's ok" He was about to put the phone away but he stopped "Can I take a picture with Henry?"

"Yeah, of course. Just give me the phone" he gave her his phone already with the camera ready to snap a picture. And she did, Henry already seemed to know what a picture was, because he stared at any phone pointing to his face every time with a smile, well trained by Tink, Mary Margaret and herself. She handed the phone back

"Maybe we should join the others" he said and she nodded. She turned around felling disappointed, this was all the alone time she got with him, they didn't get to talk about anything. Well, why would they. Probably the call was from his new girlfriend, what was she expecting? It's been a year.

She walked into the living room where everyone else was and they looked at her expectantly, she stepped aside to give room for Killian and Henry to walk in. And everyone smiled, she was certain that they really wanted to cheer up. Killian sat on the couch next to Tink giving her a huge smile with Henry on his lap. Tink started playing with Henry and the three of them seemed to be having the time of their life. She noticed in the next half hour how relaxed Killian was around everyone else, but barely looked into her direction. He was all smiles and laughters with Henry and everyone else. She felt jealous, ridiculously jealous of all of her friends.

Will and Belle arrived a few minutes later and everyone sat down to dinner. She fed Henry the food she brought for him, she wasn't really that hungry, Killian was right there, sitting right next to her, there was nothing she could stomach right now, so she was more focused into feeding the baby than eating herself. When Henry was done eating she heard his voice "I can hold him for you, so you can eat comfortably" he said softly.

"Ahhmm no, that's ok. I think I'm full. But thank you" she whispered back.

"All right" he said, and that was it, no questions, no conversation, no 'Swan you need to eat properly', no nothing. He was back to talking to the others. This was going to be a very long night.

 **Killian.**

"So, you finally met Henry. He is amazing" he heard David say, his attention was on the baby, who was smiling while dancing around the room in the arms of Belle.

"He certainly is….I should have done this sooner" he mumbled but David seemed to hear him perfectly.

"You should, but you were nowhere to be found. Even I tried to call you"

"I thought Emma didn't want me near the lad…I just…I was in a very dark place, it was best that I left" he explained.

"Well, you are finally here" there was a long silence between them, both staring at their friends having fun, until David added "I need to ask, Are you here just for Henry?" he looked into David's face, surprised by the bluntness, everyone else seemed to be avoiding the subject. After a few seconds of considering the question his eyes traveled to where he knows Emma is sitting. She was smiling beautifully looking into Belle and Henry's dancing.

"I'm not sure if there something else to be here for"

"Are you willing to find out?" David asked but he didn't have a chance to think about an answer. Mary Margaret called his husband and David left with a knowing smile.

His phone rang again, and this time he turned it off. Everyone he wanted to talk with was in this room, right in front of him. And the person who was calling was someone he didn't want to deal with right now, or perhaps anymore. He didn't announce to Milah he was leaving, but they were hardly seeing each other lately, he didn't think she'll notice, at least not this soon. He looked up again, and noticed how Belle was dancing slowly with the baby in her arms, and Henry was falling asleep fast. He wanted to go, take the baby and put him anywhere Emma wanted, but he was uncertain of his boundaries here, after another minute Emma step up and said "He is out, knowing him he won't wake up anytime soon" and saw how Emma expertly took the baby from Belle's arms without Henry even noticing. She was going to put him on the stroller but Mary Margaret stopped her and offered her bed. He saw all of this interactions feeling useless, he wanted to go and help Emma out. The something unexpected happened as he saw Emma taking Henry away, the room felt smaller, people's conversations were too loud, the air was thick, he panicked. Intellectually he knows they are just in another room of the house, emotionally here was Emma walking away from him, taking the baby with her. He walked towards the front door.

"Are you ok?" he heard Tink's worried voice when he was about to open the door.

"Yes, I just need fresh air" he answered without looking directly at her.

"Hey" she said and he looked into her eyes "I'm right here if you need to talk" he nodded and gave her a little smile then walked out the door.

He sat in the front steps for a while, taking deep breaths and calming himself, he was definitely not expecting this reaction. He lost track of time then the front door opened and he didn't need to turn around to know who was walking out, her smell was something familiar to him, he didn't remember how much.

"Tink told me you were here, everything ok?" Emma asked sitting next to him. He took a deep breath.

"Just needed fresh air" there was long comfortable silence.

"I'm glad you came. I really wanted you to meet Henry" she said, he nodded.

"Henry? I thought you hated that name, what was the word you used…umm ridiculous" he said with a grin and one of his eyebrows lifted. She rolled her eyes, and he never expected to notice how much he missed that simple recurrent gesture of hers.

"It felt right" she said simply. He didn't know what that meant, and he was not going to get his hopes up, so he let it slip.

"How are you?" he asked looking ahead. He felt as if he stared too much at her at this closeness he will end up doing something stupid as kissing her.

"I'm fine" she replied then he heard her taking a deep breath before saying "How are you? How's your hand?"

"I think my hand already healed as much as it was going to. I can barely move it. I'm supposed to get back to therapy soon"

"It will regain movement with therapy?" she asked and sounded genuinely interested.

"No….maybe the fingers a little. It won't ever be the same"

"You seem comfortable without using it. I mean…last time we saw each other…" she had trouble finishing the sentence so he interrupted her just to help her out.

"I know, I was frustrated. I guess I learned to live without it" he remembers how he lashed out at her every time he felt frustrated and she only wanted to help. He is aware that he pushed her away, even though he is a bit mad that she left. There was another long silence, although he could hear her breathe perfectly "Swan?" she turned to look at him, staring into his eyes "I really would like to spend time with Henry, as much as you allow me"

"I want you to spend time with him, as much as you want" she said with a smile and finally a tiny little bit spark of hope woke up inside him.

"Don't' say that Swan, or I'll end up being your next door neighbor" he joked and Emma laughed, oh he missed her laughter so much. Every little detail from it, the cadence, the little wrinkles in her eyes, the tiny holes on her cheeks. She is so beautiful. She stopped laughing and they fell in a silence again, he was fantasizing about living right next door. Until, Emma broke the silence.

"I'm sorry…" he felt confused, what was she apologizing for? He was about to ask but she continued "I'm sorry I left the way I did, I wasn't thinking straight, I was as frustrated as you, and I'm not trying to compare my feelings to yours, but that's how I felt".

"I'm aware of how I behaved, though I guess I had an excuse for it" he said getting serious and moving his injured hand in front of him "But I'm also aware you had an excuse for every decision you made, and is sleeping inside right now. I can't blame you for that. And I'm sorry for causing you stress…Perhaps it was not the right time for us, perhaps we should have tried harder, but that doesn't matter anymore…Look I don't want to intrude in your new life, but I want to get acquainted with the lad and maybe we should focus on that right now" she nodded.

"I took him away from you…I don't want to do that anymore"

"Good, because I really don't want you to do it." He joked and she smiled.

"Well, this is where we live now, not this house, this town. We are right here whenever you want to visit" she said looking ahead of her again.

"I could offer my services as a nanny whenever you need it, Swan" he added.

"Oh I might take you up on that, I've got a couple night shifts a week" she said and chuckled a little.

"Perfect, just call me" he said even thought he knew she was just trying to make a little joke.

"Oh, I was just joking" she said surprised.

"Well I was not….Look I know I am not the lad's father…but…it feels a little…I can't help the way I feel. And I want to be his….friend or his fake uncle or whatever you think its right" She was looking at her hands now.

"And you are ready to settle as his nanny" she said whit a smile.

"Anything that gives me time with him"

"What about we start by having breakfast at Granny's tomorrow? What do you say?" she asked

"I say I'm in" he replied with a big smile.


	20. Chapter 20

**I'm back...I was never gone, or this story never left me. It's been really carzy and busy around here. And being tired does'nt help my muse. But I promise I'll finish this story, Hopefully I can have a decent time space between chapters again. We'll get to the end.**

* * *

 **CHAPTER 20.**

 **Killian.**

To leave them last night was harder than he thought. He spent an awful amount of time turning around in bed, aware that his family was so close that he could reach them by just walking. Well, not his family, not anymore, maybe they never were.

He wants to be in Henry's life, now more than ever. He doesn't want to miss anything more than he already has. To live in another state in a city far away from this town is preposterous. He wishes he could claim Henry as his son, because no matter how much he feels as if he actually is, he really isn't. He doesn't want to be away anymore, he could travel for business, he might even move his company's headquarters to this town, he'll figure it out, but he won't stay away, no more.

When he woke up this morning, he felt so happy and giddy, he will see them again in a few minutes. He didn't feel rested but his excitement fueled him. He took a bath and went down to the diner, around half hour earlier but he didn't mind. Glad that all of their friends where having breakfast at the Nolan's, so it'll be just the three of them.

* * *

 **Emma.**

Last night was a night she's hoped for since Henry was born, a night that took almost 8 months to happen and she is the only one to blame, she is aware. Now what? She would love to walk into Granny's and kiss him good morning right in his wonderful mouth. It was so hard to say goodbye last night. She wanted at least to hug him but she couldn't, she was afraid of rejection, and he didn't seem to go for any physical form of goodnight, so she took what it was given to her, an awkward goodnight and a simple nod. Henry got up earlier than usual, and she took her time getting him ready to go out for breakfast with his father for the first time. She really needs to stop saying the "your dad" part to herself and to Henry or she would say it out loud in front of Killian and she is not emotionally smart enough to handle it.

She got herself and Henry ready for meeting Killian for breakfast, and when she saw the clock they were already 5 minutes late, they are living just half a block away from the diner so they'll be there in just a few minutes, but that didn't stop her to hurry her pace a bit. When she was nearing Granny's she saw Killian looking at his phone standing close to the door, she took her time to really see him in the morning light, he is gorgeous. He's always been gorgeous. Maybe, feeling that someone was staring at him he looked up right straight into her eyes and a beautiful smile formed on his lips, she couldn't help but mirror it and when he started walking towards them she noticed she stopped walking at some point, so she took some steps to meet him half way.

"There you are… Good morning, love" and that little word he uses as a habit with every woman he talks to, it made her heart jump a bit, because she desperately needs to be that again, his love.

"Good morning….You didn't need to wait out here"

"Well I figured you'll showed up whit the stroller so I thought you might need help getting it up those few steps at front" he said pointing at Henry's ride. Then he kneeled in front of it and took one of Henry's hands "Good morning, lad" the baby gave him a little smile and before he stood up again he put a kiss on Henry's head. It looked so natural and so sweet, a knot formed in her throat while a nice kind of warmth spread through her chest.

Killian helped her get the stroller inside and she had to admit that this was easier than her usual ritual of struggling with the thing, sometimes leaving it outside for anyone to take, no one has dared to steal from the deputy but it could happen.

"I'm sorry if we are a little bit late, it takes some time to get Henry ready to go out" She apologized.

"That's quite alright, I figured as much. I would have gone to get you but I don't know where you live" she smiled softly, because of course he would have. She needs to show him where they live.

Killian got the stroller inside the diner with little effort. It took her sitting down in front of him on one of the booths to realize almost everyone was staring. Something she might have noticed sooner if she wasn't so mesmerized by Killian's presence.

"I've got some presents for Henry, but I'll have to fetch them later from my room" he said, obviously trying to break the ice.

"You didn't have to, almost everything Henry owns right now it was a gift from you" she said with a smile, but her words had the opposite reaction she expected, he got serious and looked at Henry with sad eyes. She didn't know what to say next, of course he would have this reaction to her insensitive words, what she did was never going to be erased.

Thankfully the waitress interrupted them, and the mood got way lighter as they order their breakfast. Killian was delighted giving all his attention to the baby, laughing out loud when Henry's face ended up cover in oatmeal, his little hands sticky with honey. She was really enjoying this moment, she would love to have it every day of her life.

"I think we are popular in this diner" Killian whispered looking around, people were not even trying to hide their curiosity. She gave a pointed look to as many people as she could in a quick glance and people regained composure and faked attention to their own things.

"Sorry, these are curious people, and you are new and exciting. They just want to know Henry's father, that's all" when she finished her sentence she noticed what she said and looked into his eyes filled with terror. He looked stunned with his eyes a bit wide, but he recovered fast. And a half smile appeared on his lips "I…I…I'm sorry?" she asked awkwardly and he gave her a sweet smile.

"Don't apologize; we found each other in an unique situation here…no matter the circumstances I always felt as his father, and I thought…well, to be honest I'm relieved that you still seem to feel the same way about it" her pulse was so loud she could swear Killian could hear it, she could barely hear anything other than her heart jumping inside her chest. Was she dreaming? Maybe she fell asleep at some point while having breakfast. "I went to hell and back, Swan. And I still love him, that won't ever change" he said more seriously. She was out of words, she just watched as he gave his attention back to Henry. She was screwed, there was no way she would stop loving him after this.

When they finished eating, Killian went back to his room to fetch the gifts, and she took Henry to the bathroom of the diner to wash his hands and face. When she was walking back to her booth she almost collided with Graham "Oh…Emma, sorry!" he said with his adorable accent.

"No harm done" She said with a smile, Henry was already reaching out for Graham who never disappointed and took him in his arms making him laugh. Graham was a nice quiet man, but with Henry he became a silly child. Emma kept walking towards her booth and sat down, followed by Graham.

"So, how are the Swans doing this fine morning?" he asked making a silly face to the baby getting a contagious laugh out of him, one that made Emma smile widely.

"We are very good, thank you. Henry just had breakfast with his…"

"Swan?" she heard Killian's voice and she met his eyes immediately, he looked confused.

"Killian..." she said pointing to the sit next to her feeling nervous. He followed her instruction, looking carefully at Graham. Her boss looked surprised and a bit uncomfortable. Well, with the stare Killian was giving him that seemed understandable "This is my boss. Storybrook's sheriff"

"Graham Humbert" said her boss reaching out his hand. It took Killian a couple of seconds to take it.

"Killian Jones" he said looking unfriendly, and then his eyes went to Henry. And she got it, let's be honest if the situation was reversed and Killian was sitting here with another woman who was holding Henry, she wouldn't be on her best behavior either. An awkward silence fell into the table. Henry made a noise calling for attention and Graham cleared his throat.

"Well, I should get going" Graham said standing up with Henry in his arms, followed by Killian who took the baby from him, way more comfortable than last night holding the baby "Welcome to Storybrooke" he said before he left, Killian sat back next to Emma, sitting the baby on the table in front of him while holding him in place.

"Are you dating him?" he asked without even looking at her, with a flat tone of voice.

"No" she said in a little voice but she knew he heard her because he relaxed a bit, it was almost undetectable but she was really paying attention.

"He likes you" he said still staring at Henry.

"No he doesn't" she answered fast, that was ridiculous. She was most certain Graham was secretly seeing someone. Killian turned to look at her at last.

"Yes he does. You seem to forget how beautiful you are" then he passed Henry to her and turned around to get the bag he brought from his room, the one he left on the floor next to him. And she was thanking everything that was divine for allowing her a second to recover from that one.

"I have spent 8 months buying things for him. So not everything is here…take a look at this lad" he said taking a big orange octopus from the bag "A kraken" he said putting it in front of Henry, the baby must have found the shape of the thing funny, because he was giggling while trying to grab the felted tentacles. The light an easiness from before returned to Killian's eyes. The bag was filled with goodies, there were clothes, a tiny pirate hat, a couple more toys, and a colorful and beautiful version of Peter Pan's book.

They picked up their things and left the diner. They still need a good talk, about what was going on next, he said he wants to be a part of Henry's life, she needed to know what he meant by that.

When they were outside Granny's there was a bit of hesitation on both parts. None of them knew what to do next. Except for Henry, he was very happy playing with his Kraken on his stroller.

"Are you leaving today with the others?" she asked, she really wanted to know and there was no better moment to ask than right now, when he might just leave for a few days or weeks in a matter of minutes. Killian looked into her eyes for a few seconds, he was making a choice she could see it in his eyes, she knows him enough to know that.

"I don't want to" he said slowly and her heart pounded wildly in her chest "But I guess I have to. I just got back from…just got back to Boston and there are a few things I have to put in order at the company. And I didn't bring clothes for a longer stay".

"I see" she really tried not to sound disappointed.

"I guess I didn't expect for us to be on the same page" he said scratching behind his right ear. She must have looked confused because ' _What page is he talking about? She has no idea where are they standing right now'_. But he soon clarified "With Henry I mean"

"Right" she said trying to compose herself.

"But I'll be back if you'll have me, in a couple of days" she smiled feeling relieved.

"Of course…Will you walk us home, so you can see where to find us?" she asked with a smile.

"Lead the way".


	21. Chapter 21

Killian.

This past two days in Boston had been tolerable just because he's been really busy. He's been working from New York for a while now, Will was the only one he talked to those months he was away, so to find a way to keep working from afar again was not difficult. But he needs to get everything back in order. He left someone to manage the New York office, but he'll have to travel there once in a while. He left everything ready to work from Storybrooke with a laptop and a WiFi connection. He prefers to travel to Boston and New York once in a while than visiting Storybrooke once in a while, so that's it.

Milah kept on calling, he will answer one of these days, when he's settled and he has time for it. What they had could barely be called a relationship. She was more like her drinking buddy with benefits. There were no dates, there were no relationship responsibilities, there were no promises made. He decided to leave so he left, he didn't owe her an explanation, and to be honest he could try, his gentlemanly ways pulled him to it, but he knows it was going to be futile. She doesn't want explanations, she wants him back in New York to have him available to her again. She will find someone else to keep her entertained soon enough.

He's coming back home, and that's wherever Emma and Henry are. His friends are interested in knowing if he is going to try to get Emma back, but his priority is his relationship with Henry, Emma and him are better just as friends right now, where they can't hurt each other, and they can't hurt Henry. What they need to figure out right now is how does he fit in their lives as a parent figure for Henry.

The sun was setting when he got into town, a beautiful view from his bedroom at Granny's. The driver helped him get his suitcases up to his room, and left back to Boston. He took a bath to get rid of all the stress of the day before going to Emma's loft. He felt nervous when he was standing in front of the door, he could tell to himself and others that he is not here for a romantic relationship with Emma, but the truth is he doesn't believe there's any other kind of relationship he is really interested in having with her. He knocked and waited. Soon Emma opened the door, and when she saw him a smile spread on her lips.

"You are really back" she said looking surprised.

"Did you doubt me for a minute?"

"I just…I thought you were going to be back earlier…"

"Sorry to keep you waiting…It's been a crazy couple of days" and he noticed as a pretty blush covered her cheeks

"Come in" she said and he took a step inside, walking past her and the scent of wild flowers and vanilla enveloped him and warmed his chest. How did he live without it for so long?

Henry was crawling on the middle of the loft, but at the sight of him, the baby made a joyful noise and started his way towards him, he kneeled waiting for him with a smile and grabbed him from the floor as soon as the baby reached him "Woaw, you are really fast" he said laughing while hugging the baby "You must keep your mom on her toes" he said looking into the baby's face.

"I live in terror for the day he stars walking. I'm pretty sure he'll try running first" Emma joked, and when he gave a look at her, he noticed she was cleaning her eyes from unshed tears. She turned around quickly and made her way to the kitchen.

"Everything ok?" he knows Emma, she looks happy, at least on the surface, but there's sadness in her eyes, she may be able to hide it from everyone else but not from him.

"Do you want something? Water, Cocoa?" she asked facing him and avoiding his question, holding the fridge handle with one hand, and a fresh new smile on her face.

"I would like to taste your cocoa again if you don't mind" he said scratching behind his ear. He couldn't waste this opportunity, he's embracing any taste of the past that he can get.

"Sure, I want some too. You can put Henry on the floor, I let him crawl around for a while every evening, just keep an eye or two on him" she joked, but he took the warning very seriously, as much as he would love to watch every move Emma makes, he wouldn't risk Henry's safety. He noticed a corner packed with toys and a colorful carpet and sat Henry in the middle of everything, he sat down with him. The location was perfect, because he could keep an eye on both of them. Probably Emma put the toys here for that reason to keep an eye on the lad.

The baby started handing him everything he owns, showing it to him probably. And this was the most fun he had in a long while.

He caught Emma's eyes again, and even when she had a sweet little smile, her eyes told other story. She looked at her watch "What about we give Henry a bath and get him ready for bed, and let the cocoa for after that?" she said turning off the stove.

"You are the captain of this vessel, lass" he joked and her smile looked genuine this time.

"Very well, sailor. Keep him occupied while I get everything ready In the bathroom. Henry started crawling around, and he followed with his eyes, his body ready to jump to his feet at any moment if needed. The baby crawled to the stroller and was trying to get something from it pulling it to him from one end, he noticed it was the octopus he gave him a couple days ago. He walked to it and helped him, when he handed the stuffed animal to him, Henry gave it back to him.

"Are you giving it back already?" he asked amused.

"He loves that thing, he must really like you if he is sharing it with you. He doesn't even let me hold it for long" he looked up and Emma was staring at them leaning on the bathroom's door frame "Bring him here. Now it's a good time to train you on bathing duty"

"Are you sure about that?" he asked while pulling the kid from the floor, it was challenging with one and a half hand but not impossible. And to hold Henry was getting easier with practice.

"If you are serious about babysitting, then this is an opportunity we should take. You need to start your training right away" she said walking into the bathroom.

Emma was giving orders and watching, helping him when he struggled and pointing easier ways to do things. She told him how terrified she was the first time she gave him a bath, he was so tiny and she was scared he would slip from her hand and drown, and how she was always imagining the worst case scenario with everything new she had to do with the baby. He listened intently to every story, but paying attention to every move he made with the baby. Thankfully Henry is not as small as he was in Emma's stories, it really sounded terrifying.

He felt a deep regret for not being there, for being weak, drowning in alcohol and misery, not helping Emma before because he was feeling sorry for himself; busy making the stupid mistake of going back to Milah's arms. What the fuck was he thinking?

"Everything ok, there? You look really upset with the floor" he looked up, and she was right he lost himself in his thoughts staring at the floor while she was drying the baby with a towel.

"I'm fine, love. I was thinking about how much I missed" he said and she gave him that little pretty smile, and he knows she understands.

"Don't worry, you are here now for the fun stuff. There's still walking, and first words, and running around, and asking too many questions…There's a lot to pick from" he smiled feeling better imagining being there for those ones "Don't look so happy, there are some dreadful too, he's not teething yet, but that'll be soon and from what I hear it will be awful" she walked past him getting out of the bathroom, and he followed her. She pointed where the baby's clothes were, and diapers, and everything he would need for Henry.

After putting the first diaper he's put on a baby on his life, and dressing the baby, very slowly, grateful that Emma and Henry were really patient with him; Emma got back to the kitchen to make the hot cocoa, he walked around with Henry in his arms sucking on a bottle of formula. Emma was staring at them "You are going to spoiled him, I help him with it on his crib, I don't think I can hold him that long, he's gotten heavy"

"Luckily I'm strong enough" he said with a smile. Henry went out like a light after drinking the bottle, snuggled into Killian's chest, and to be honest he didn't want to put him down; but Henry would be more comfortable on his crib, so he did.

Emma called for him from the couch, the loft wasn't too big so they could easily watch Henry from afar, but not wake him up with their conversation. So he approached her, she calls to him like a siren, he is helpless when she speaks his name.

* * *

 **Emma.**

Two days since he left, she was nervous, there was no hiding it. Even Graham noticed. Killian said he'll be back in a couple of days, well is day two already and there is no sign of him.

She calmed herself down mid morning meditating that if he was coming today it was going to be after noon at least. So she waited, biting her nails, typing over and over the same thing on her computer, not succeeding at doing it right. She was more anxious than when he came back over the weekend for the first time after a long time of not seeing him, because she wasn't expecting much back then, she thought he wouldn't talk to her more than he needed to. But that was not the case, now she is full of hope. She is not a fan of "hoping" but she hopes they could mend things, that in time they will be able to start all over again, do things properly now.

By the end of the day she was disappointed, she wanted to text him, to ask him when was he coming back, but she didn't feel like she should ask, they are not there yet. He'll come when he comes.

"Well kid, I really thought we were seeing your dad today. But it seems is not going to happen" she said to the baby after they entered their home and closed the door "I'm so glad you don't understand yet, because I would hate to see you as disappointed as I feel…Maybe if we sent him a picture" she put Henry on the couch and took her phone out from her jeans. But the baby was not having any of it, he wanted to go to the floor and play with his toys. No picture was good enough to send, so she quit. She just sat there on the floor, watching Henry play with his things, feeling sad.

Eventually she relaxed, she ended up lying on the floor, with Henry placing toys on her stomach. Time went by when a knock on the door startled her. Her heart was trying to jump out of her chest. She got up, checked on Henry and took a deep breath, trying to compose herself. She opened the door and there he was, then she remembered he always does what he says he will, she should have been more patient.

That precious moment when Henry recognized Killian and crawled towards him as fast as he's little limbs allowed him it was the most beautiful thing she's witnessed. And the way Killian grabbed him from the floor and hugged him was too much, she was about to cry of happiness, but soon she remembered why this was happening now and like this. Killian was supposed to be there, but she left. She turned around and she tried to hide the sadness that over took her.

She felt guilty, and she didn't want to ruin the evening with her feelings, she ruined enough already. She is not sure what is a family supposed to feel but she guesses is close to this, spending and evening playing with your kid, then giving him a bath together, watching his father give a bottle and put him to sleep. It was the most amazing evening she'd ever had.

She made the hot cocoa she promised him earlier and called him to join her at the living area. Henry was sleeping already, so maybe, they could talk a bit without the baby acting as a buffer.

"He is so beautiful, I think I could watch him sleep for hours" he said and sat down next to her on the couch. Taking his phone out of his pocket and placing it on the coffee table, then grabbing his cup of cocoa.

"I know what you mean, I think I've done that" she admitted giggling "when he was smaller, I think I watched him for hours" he smiled keeping his eyes on the crib that was sitting across the loft. "It's a shame you couldn't meet him when he was born. He was so tiny, but so much hair on his head" she giggled again with the memory.

"I have to confess, love. I did meet him the day he was born". He said sounding serious, she was about to sip her cup of cocoa and she stopped half way…Wait, what?

"You did? How? Where?" she inquired trying to make sense to what he just confessed.

"I went to the hospital…Did you really think I could stay away?" she couldn't think of an answer "I saw him through the glass of the babies ward. Tink showed him to me, no one else saw me"

"I waited for you" she admitted almost in a whisper. He looked surprised.

"What do you mean?" he asked putting his cup on the coffee table and turning around on his seat to face her.

"That night, I was so sure you were coming, and I waited for you. But you never showed up" her eyes filling with tears, remembering how hopeless she felt back then, how lost and lonely she still feels. He frowned, concerned in his eyes.

"What have we done to each other?" he contemplated. And with that question the first tear traveled down her face. He reached out to clean it with the back of his hand "I'm here now, I love Henry as if he was my own, Swan. I'm not going anywhere. I'll be here for the two of you, whatever you need" but what if what she needs is him? She wishes she could ask him exactly what she needs right now, she needs him to stay the night, to sleep with her, for him to hold her hand all night long, for him to be there when she opens her eyes. Should she ask? Should she say what was on her mind since the moment she saw him again. When she left him, she asked him to look for her when he finds again the man she fell in love with, has he found him? Because if this is the Killian she fell in love with or the Killian she left behind, she doesn't care anymore, they are both the same person, and she loves him. But before she complicates anything with her feelings she needs to reassure him about Henry.

"I've got to admit that doing all of this parenting by myself is empowering, it is a lot and I can do it. But I can admit that I will appreciate the help, and I'm so happy that Henry has you. He is not your blood, but I won't insult you by saying he is not your responsibility, because I know you. You were with me since day one, since the day I found out he was coming, you held my hair when I threw up, you went out in the middle of the night for any craving I had, you bought almost everything Henry owns and I wish he could sleep in the beautiful crib you bought for him. I was never going to speak to Henry about Neal, but I've been talking to him about you since the day he was born, and I'm so happy you are back into his life, and that you want to be in it" tears were running freely now down her face, her speech became a passionate one, and Killian looked surprised, he wasn't expecting such a speech for sure. Then he smiled.

"I'm sorry it took me so long, love" he said with a smile and Emma laugh while cleaning her tears "come here" he said before pulling her to him and hugging her tight "You look too sad, Swan. Cheer up" he said caressing her hair and she melted in his embrace, closing her eyes enjoying every second of it. Then his phone started ringing "ignore it" he said. But she looked at it, it was really close to her and the screen said 'Her'.

"It's her" she announced out loud. A cold shiver ran through her body, and every sensation and emotion she was having one second ago was gone.

"What?" he said separating his body from hers turning towards the phone to grab it. Of course he has a 'Her', anyone would be lucky to have him, she is the only one crazy enough to let him go. She feels numb, this is why she's been sad all day long, things were too good to be truth. He canceled the call and turned the phone off "that's not important" then he turned around to look at her, and she tried to look ok with this situation, failing of course because Killian looked worried or something she couldn't really name.

"It's ok if you need to take that call….I…I'm…"

"It's not what you think" he said frowning.

"You don't have to explain"

"I know, but it is not what you think" he repeated. So she went for it.

"So the person who is calling you is not someone you've been seeing these past months? Because that's what it seems like, and it's ok, we are not together, we have not been together for a while" she lied, because it is not ok, it is never going to be ok, but who is she to say something, she left him. He looked at her straight in the eyes, but he said nothing, and she understood she hit the mark. And her mind conjured an image of Killian walking around town with some woman and Henry, this is a nightmare. He passed a hand over his face.

"I'm not seeing her anymore" that was his choice of words. So he isn't seeing her anymore, but he was.

"You don't have to explain" she said but she wanted an explanation, she wanted to know who this person is, how long they were together, how long it took him to find someone else after they broke up, if he is not with this woman why is she calling, why did they break up, does she knows he has a son with her, a son that has not his blood, but is his nonetheless. Who is her? How does she looks like, did he love her, does she loves him. So many questions ran through her mind so fast that it was giving her a headache.

Killian grabbed his cup back and took a big sip from it. She just looked at him, she has considered that he might have met someone, that he has a girlfriend, anyone would be lucky to have him, but it was a shock nonetheless. The little tiny bit of intimacy they were having a minute ago was gone and there was no getting back, not tonight.

After a few minutes of silence, and after he drank the rest of the content of his cup he said "Maybe I should go"

"Right…Are you staying at Granny's?" she asked him trying to sound casual, while they were walking towards the door.

"For now, tomorrow I'll start looking for a place" he said, the easiness of the whole evening was gone.

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow" she said opening the door. He stood there looking at her, unmoving.

After a few seconds he walked out and turned around when he was outside "I missed you" he said and she took a deep breath lost I his eyes.

"I missed you too, good night" she replied then closed the door and leaned back into it. Now she couldn't take away from her mind this faceless woman who was most likely calling him to get him back. Who wouldn't? Not everyone makes the same mistakes she does. She should have gone back to that apartment when she had a chance, now she is not so sure she does.


	22. Chapter 22

Hello dear friends!

This chapter it's going to be longer than usual. I hope you enjoy it, and let me now if you did or didn't. I'll be posting the next one soon. I'm trying to get to the end without long time spaces between chapters. So, here you go!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 22.**

 **Killian.**

He walked into his bedroom at granny's and slammed the door in an attempt to release some of his frustration, but of course it didn't work, because he was still frustrated and angry with himself, and Milah for her timing.

He should have known better, back then he felt hopeless, he really thought he would never have a chance with Emma, that his body and his soul wouldn't ever mend enough to face her again; but he should have known better, because here he is. He doesn't know what they are or what they are going to become but he already let Milah get in between them.

He took his phone out from his jeans and turned it on, he needs to take care of this situation tonight, he's been postponing it because he really doesn't want to talk to her, but he has to. He found the contact saved as "Her" and realized how much worst this would have been if he had the contact saved with her name. He knows he will have to tell Emma eventually, and he will, but not just now, he's been barely back, whatever they have is still so fragile, he doesn't want to jeopardize it. He taped the Call button and waited

"Finally. Are you back already?" Milah's voice asked sounding a bit impatient.

"I'm not coming back to New York" he announced. There was a long silence on the other side of the line.

"I figured you weren't in town. Call me crazy but I thought you'd be nice enough to tell me if you were leaving for good" she said.

"I don't think we have that kind of relationship" he objected.

"Are you in Boston?" her question filled with bitterness, he didn't answer "Does this has something to do with the blonde one?" he frowned but before he could say anything she continued "She left you Killian, she left you when you were in an off place. You know how shallow she is, she left you for an aesthetic issue. You came here and I picked up the pieces she left of you, I rebuild you, I cared for you…"

"All I remember you doing was feeding me acohol and…."

"And fucking you senseless" she interrupted "At least I didn't mind to fuck you with all and your injury, can she say the same?" she asked, venom in her words.

"You have no idea what you're talking about. I'm back to my life now, back to my son."

"Your son?" she sneered and laugh sarcastically before asking "How does she do that to you? I have to give it to her, she knows how to pull your strings…Don't be ridiculous Killian, you have no responsibilities to that child, come back to New York, if what you needed was more, I can do that, we can do that. We can try a real relationship"

"I'm sorry, lass. You and I would never work, it has never been about feelings and you know it"

"This is not over, Killian" she said with pause, and it sounded more like a threat.

"It is, I'm sure you'll find someone else in no time, if you don't' have him yet" he hanged up without giving her another chance to say anything, she is good at manipulating, and she is trying to plant a seed of doubt into him. But things weren't as black and white as she described them. Emma is not a bad woman who left him at his worst as she thinks, Emma left when he failed to treat her right, when they barely talk anymore, he avoided her all the time, he even stopped making love to her about a month before she left. He didn't expect her to leave but she was right by doing it.

The reason of his depression and so auto destructiveness back then was because he knews he made her leave, he lost her, it was he's doing. And deep down he knows she was right, he was no longer the man she fell in love with, he became a shadow of who he used to be.

The most amazing thing happened a few minutes ago, he held her in his arms again, he can still smell her all over him. He needs to fix whatever this call did, and knowing Emma as well as he knows her, to reassure her is not a matter of saying something is a matter of showing her, giving her space and letting her go at her own pace.

But he is tired of staying away.

* * *

 **Emma.**

She was in a terrible mood when she woke up in the morning, she left Henry at the day care, and went to work. Killian texted her asking if he could see them today, she was not going to denied them time together, but she didn't want to see him right now, so she decided to let Henry and Killian spend some time alone, so she called Mary Margaret before calling him, and asked him to meet her in front of Granny's after work.

She parked in front of the diner at the time they agreed earlier, and he was there, waiting. She got out of the car and went around it to open the passenger's door.

"Hello, love" he said with a smile when she was in front of him.

"Hi" she said and opened the door to get the baby out from his safety seat on the back seat. When she was holding Henry in her arms she faced Killian "It's just the two of you this time, is that ok?"

"I believe so" he mumbled looking confused and taking Henry from her.

"I'll be at Mary Margaret's, call me if anything happens, anything, ok?" she said sounding way to serious, having him in front of her just reminded her he's been with someone, he probably called other woman last night.

"Yes, of course" he said frowning. She grabbed the diaper's bag from the car and handed it to him.

"There are snacks in there, I'll feed him dinner when I pick him up. If you put him in front of the tv, he will be entertained for a while. He is a sweet boy, I'm sure you'll have fun" Henry looked happy to be in Killian's arms and that softened her up, and she smiled softly.

"We will, don't worry for us, go meet Mary Margaret, relax and have fun" he encouraged her with a smile. She looked at them intently, not really wanting to go, not because she didn't trust Killian, because she wanted to stay and join them. She sighed.

"Ok. I'll be back soon" she got closer to give a kiss into Henry's head "I'll see you soon kid, I love you" she said and at this closeness she heard the inhale of breath Killian took when she said that, and she noticed then how long has been since she said those words to him, a little blush covered her cheeks and she avoided his eyes.

She got in the car and drove away.

"He said that he is seeing someone?" Mary Margaret's surprised voice asked while putting a cup of hot cocoa in front of Emma.

"No, he said he was seeing someone and he is not anymore. But this someone is calling him, so who says they are not going to get back together" Emma explained her paranoid side of the story.

"He is here, in Storybrooke. Far away from everything and everyone just to be close to you and Henry" Mary Margaret reminded her.

"He is here just for Henry, not for me" she said stubbornly.

"I don't think so, Have you really not noticed the way he looks at you? It's seems as if you were made of gold and he is a pirate looking at his treasure."

"what tha f… You really need to stop reading books for kids" the both of them giggled "I think you are mistaking it with the way he looks at Henry"

"No, not mistaking it, but it does look a lot like that"

"This is a ridiculous conversation" Emma said giggling again, their giggles faded into silence, the both of them lost in thoughts and a picture of some woman kissing Killian appeared on her mind "He was with someone" she said lamely and Mary Margaret reached for her hand and gave a her a little squeeze giving her a tight smile, she looked up into her friend's eyes "I know is not fair of me to expect otherwise, I was the one who left him, but still…"

"Focus in the present Emma, you obviously still have feelings for him, you guys could make things the right way this time, you could become a family. But don't shut him out because he got a call from an exgirlfriend. He is here with you" it was difficult to let go of the exgirlfriend thing, she should be his ex, maybe is not fair to think that way, but she can't help how she feels. After Milah he didn't see anyone else for so long, he did one night stands, that's what he told her, so why was he seeing someone, that sounds a lot like dating, a lot like a 'girlfriend'.

"He is not with me, we are in the same town. I can't put myself in a position where I get disappointed if he doesn't want me, we have to think about Henry and his happiness. Is best if we stay friends just for him" she said more to herself than Mary Margaret.

"Well I can't argue with that. But Emma, don't shut yourself up. Those walls of yours it may keep out pain but also it may keep out love. I bet that since that phone call you've been picturing ways to keep Henry close to him but yourself as far away as you can" Emma cringed in her sit, Mary Margaret was so right "Here you are spending time with me, which I appreciate, but you are secretly wishing you were there with them. Am I wrong?" she asked and Emma just nodded her answer slowly, Mary Margaret smiled "What do you say if you leave after you finished you cocoa? Go spend time with them

* * *

 **Killian**.

Now that was a surprise. Emma left, at least this time he knows she is coming back because she left him her most precious thing. Standing still in front of Granny's with Henry in his arms, staring at the end of the street where Emma's car disappeared, he sighed looking at Henry's face, who was attentive waiting for him to do something "Well lad, it appears it's just the two of us this evening."

The evening was very windy, so he decided against walking around with Henry "We better go inside, lad. It seems as if it's going to rain" He walked into the diner and sat on a booth placing Henry on his lap, still deciding what to do he looked into the diaper bag expecting to find something in there to entertain them. Maybe he'll take Emma's suggestion and go to his room to sit in front of the tv with the baby, although that sounds lazy, he is not really fond of the telly. He found himself out of sorts because it was a surprise being alone with Henry, if he had known beforehand he would have had a plan. He has to improvise, and he has to do it fast.

"Hey" he heard a familiar voice coming from his right. So he turned into that direction and found David walking towards them.

"Hello, mate" he said with a smile and Henry made an excited noise at seeing David.

"I didn't know you were back already" he said reaching them.

"I am" Killian replied but David's attention was on Henry.

"Where's Emma?" David asked looking around after giving a kiss to Henry's head.

"I believe she is with your lovely wife. That's what we were told" he explained.

"Oh…I didn't know. Well I guess I have some time to kill then…" He said with a smile and sat in front of him.

"You don't want to interrupt them" Killian concluded.

"Well, taking in consideration that you are here. Maybe they will appreciate to be alone for a while to talk." He answered with a little smile that suggested a secret.

The waiter approached them and they ordered coffee, Killian asked her if they have those coloring sheets and crayons some diners have for children, the girl nodded with a smile and brought some for Henry, so they entertained him with that, though he spends more time throwing the crayons to the floor, and them picking them up.

"I'm glad you are here. It's comforting to know that Emma and Henry have you in their lives. You know they have us and they know it but is not the same" David said after a few minutes of being quiet watching him and Henry play.

"I'm not going anywhere, mate. I just regret it took me so long to find my way back to them. I should have been here sooner" he said with melancholy in his voice.

"I want to be completely honest with you Killian…Emma is family, we feel very protective of her. When they move out of the city it felt as if a piece of our family was gone, so we followed, and we are happier here, that's for sure.." Killian knew that a warning was coming somewhere, so he braced himself "I understand that the way things ended between the two of you was complicated, but what I'm trying to say is that if you are not here to stay for good, then be honest with her and with yourself and leave, this is not just about you and Emma, is about Henry" David said giving a look to the baby, who was tossing the crayons around the table.

"I'm aware" he said getting serious "don't worry about it, Henry is my kid and I'm not going anywhere" he assured, David looked into his eyes for a long time probably looking for certainty on his eyes, he seemed to be pleased with what he found and smiled.

"Yes he is, I'm glad you are back"

David left after a few minutes. Henry got bored of the crayons so Killian decided to change venues, his bedroom will do, and Emma will know where to find them. He sat on the bed with Henry and decided to use his phone as an entertainment instrument, searching and playing videos suited for babies. He was quickly learning which ones were Henry's favorites when there was a knock on the door. He grabbed the baby from the bed, an image of Henry falling from it when his back was turned was enough encouragement to carry him with him to the door. He opened it and there she was, the mother of the precious bundle of excitement he was holding. Henry reached for her mother, and she complied with a beautiful smile kissing him repeatedly.

"I thought it will take you longer" he said with a smile "Do you want to come in?" he asked stepping aside.

"Sure" she said walking in and looking around "It was just a cup of coffee. Did you guys have dinner?" she asked.

"You said you will give him dinner when you arrived" he said confused.

"Yeah, I know. I meant…" she seemed awkward and that made him suspicious, was she asking to see if he was able to follow a simple instruction? he frowned "Are you hungry? We could buy something at Granny's and carried to my place. If you want, or not" he could easily see the insecurity in her eyes and he relaxed, of course he'll have dinner with her, is she kidding him? Why would she think he'll say no.

"Of course, Swan. Let's do that" he said with a soft smile, she relaxed visibly and smiled back.

"Great, let's go because I'm really hungry. And it's almost time for his dinner" she said pointing at Henry.

Remembering how she said that Henry was getting heavier for her to carry for a long time, he offered to hold him and she seemed pleased with the gesture. They bought a couple of grilled cheese with onion rings and walked the distance to her home. She had something made for Henry already, she just warmed it up and he realized that he needed to get acquainted with baby food, he didn't want to give him something he shouldn't be eating.

Soon Henry was sitting at his corner with his toys and they sat to eat staring at him. He was expecting Emma to arrive still upset at him as she seemed earlier, but she was almost as relaxed as she was yesterday.

"What did you do the last hour?" she asked and then took another bite of her sandwich.

"We hanged out for a bit with David. And you found us watching videos on youtube, baby friendly of course; I found out Henry really likes a show that is about pirate children and Captain Hook"

"Oh yeah, he loves that one. I don't think he understands much, but he seems hypnotized when he watches it" she smiled beautifully, that smile that appeares every time she talks about Henry or is hugging or kissing Henry, it's the most beautiful smile he's seen on her face so far. They finished up eating not talking much, just watching Henry and making comments about him. When they were done he felt the need of saying something about the phone call, it might ruin the entire evening but he needs her to know that call meant nothing.

"Emma…about last night…"

"Don't…I really don't want to know, and it doesn't matter, ok" she interrupted him, he wasn't comfortable with not talking about it but he won't push it.

They bathed Henry together again, it was two nights in a row, he wasn't sure how was he going to survive without doing this every single night. When he was giving Henry his bottle, he saw Emma yawning "You look tired, Swan. I leave you to it as soon as Henry's finished" she smiled.

"I didn't sleep very well last night. But I wanted to watch a movie tonight, you can join me if you want" she offered looking at her hands, he doesn't want to leave, ever. So any excuse to stay for a bit longer it's ok by him. Even though he was sure Emma was not going to last but a few minutes after any movie started.

After putting Henry to sleep they sat on the couch and Emma selected a movie on Netflix. He didn't really care what she played, he was not going to be putting much attention to it. As he predicted Emma fell asleep a few minutes after the movie started, her head making contact with his shoulder.

He put his nose to her hair and inhaled the scent of it. He wished he could hold her properly, but he was counting his blessings, so he just closed his eyes and the next time he opened them the movie credits were rolling up on the screen. Emma was cuddled up to his side, one of her arms surrounding his waist. Suddenly the apartment was lighted almost completely by a lighting, the loud thunder coming a few seconds after it, that's when he noticed the sound of raining outside. Emma sat upright startled.

"Woaw that was loud" she looked up towards where Henry was sleeping "I'm surprised it didn't wake him up."

"It's raining pretty bad out there" he said standing up to look out the window. She stood next to him "I should get going" Another lightning followed by a thunderous noise, those lightning were falling somewhere close. This one did woke up Henry, the baby started crying and the both of them ran towards him. He was aware Emma wasn't comfortable alone in nights like this ones, she is brave enough to endure it if she has too. But now Henry was startled too, and he really didn't want to leave them alone in this storm. Emma held Henry tight to her chest trying to comfort him while he rub his hand through the baby's back. The joined effort seemed to work fast, he was not asleep but he was relaxed with his head on his mother's shoulder. Big tears hanging from his eyes, and Killian felt as if someone was squeazing his heart.

"Swan, I know I should go but…" Another thunder and Emma's jump didn't help with the baby who started sobbing again. Killian started talking to him, and Henry reached for him. Emma gave him gladly to him, looking relieve

"I think I'm scaring him, I hate storms…You shouldn't walk outside in this weather, I'd be too worried of you being fried by a lightning" she said nervously.

"I'll stay, I don't think I could sleep at all knowing the two of you are jumping and crying all night long. That rain doesn't look like budging anytime soon." He explained staring in the direction of the window "I'll take the couch".

"The couch is too small for you" she said, he looked at the mentioned furniture and he could see how she was right. But he didn't mind sleeping in a sitting position if he had too.

"Well, give me a comforter and a pillow and I'll make my bed on the floor" she nodded and another thunder, Emma jumped startled again, her eyes scared. He bounced the baby whispering nonesense in his ears and Henry stayed quiet, he could only feel how his little arms grabbed his neck a bit tighter, a brave lad he thought. He walked towards the bed and sat on the edge, bouncing Henry gently.

Emma went to fetch the things he asked for and when she approached him she asked "Are you sure about this? I can take the couch, I'm a bit smaller than you"

"I'm sure, I can make my bed next to the crib, in case Henry cries again" She nodded, not looking convinced. Henry was relaxing again when another lightning lighted the loft and he felt the baby holding him tighter, bracing for the thunder that was coming next. He was fascinated how quickly such a small baby could associate one thing to the other when the sound came and he felt Emma grabbing one of his arms. If his other hand wasn't so useless he'd be holding her hand or something to comfort her too.

He tried to put Henry back into the crib and didn't succeed the kid held tight to him and Emma chuckled "I don't think he'll let you put him in there. It's better if we just wait until he is asleep." He nodded.

"Come to bed with mom Henry" she said offering her arms to her baby. But the kid didn't even move, he look at her and held tighter to Killian's neck again. Emma laugh out loud "You prefer your dad because his big and strong and can protect you from the storm, right?" Killian smiled, because it really seems as that was happening "Well I can't blame you" she said almost in a whisper to the baby and put a kiss to his head "Come sit on the bed" she instructed him, and he followed her "He'll be sleep in no time" she added, Killian sat down leaning his back to the headboard, Emma walked around the bed and sat next to him.

Another lightning, and he felt Emma pressing against him, when the roar of the thunder came her hands held his arms tight, Henry was doing the same thing with his neck. For the first time he felt of real use for the both of them.

They fell asleep at some point, Henry in the middle of the bed between the two of them. Killian woke up in the middleof the night and the sight almost made him cry of hapiness. Henry sleeping peacefully with one of his little hands on his arm, Emma on the other side of Henry facing them deep in sleep. For a second he thought he was dreaming, then he remembered the storm and the lightnings, and how scared Emma and Henry were. He can hear the rain going down outside, he considered going to the couch or the floor. But he really didn't want to move, he was perfectly fine right here, so he closed his eyes again and let the sleep take down.

* * *

 **Emma.**

She woke up earlier than she should have woken up, the light of the morning was barely there. She noticed Henry next to her, but cuddled to another chest, a very familiar chest. She looked up to see into Killian's face, he was still asleep, she turned around slowly and grabbed her phone from the night stand, she took a picture of her two boys, she will need to remember this moment. She closed her eyes again.

It felt as if she slept for days when she woke up again but probably was just a few minutes. Henry was playing with her hair, when she opened her eyes, Henry's face was closer to hers than she expected, and made and excited noise when he realized she was awake. She looked towards Killian but he was still sleeping, so she whispered "shhh don't wake your dad up" She got up from the bed carefully and took Henry trying to not disturb Killian.

She changed Henry's diaper, put him in his crib and then went to take a shower. And there's when it hit her, she slept with Killian. Well, next to Killian. She should fight for Killian, it doesn't matter what happened this past year they were apart. He hasn't said exactly that he wants a relationship with her again, but Mary Margaret is right. She needs to be open to the idea.

She was already showered and dressed for the day when her phone ringed on top of the nightstand, waking Killian up. She walked fast towards it and took the call.

"Good morning, Emma" she heard Graham's voice greeting her. She sat on the bed, Killian was still lying down but staring at her intently, she looked at him and smile, just to let him know it's ok he is on her bed. He seemed to relax a bit, and he got up and started walking away.

"Graham, good morning to you to" she said and then put the phone on speaker to be able to talk at the same time she put on her boots and stares at Killian, who reached Henry's crib.

"You sound chipper, I'd think you'd be moody after the lightning storm" He said and you could hear the smile on his voice.

"Yeah we are fine" she said smiling, of course she was fine, Killian slept on her bed, and was now saying good morning to Henry.

"I almost went last night to check up on you, but I guessed you'd call if you needed me to" he said and she noticed Killian freezing his caress on the baby's head.

"Killian was here with us" she said and the confused silence in the other line made her explain further "Henry's dad" then Killian looked at her and gave her a little smile before making his way to the bathroom.

"Oh…right, Henry's dad. Well, I'm sorry to call you in earlier than usual but the storm made a bit of a havoc around town"

"Sure, I'll be there as soon as I can" she assured him and hanged up.

A few minutes later Killian walked out of the bathroom, his face washed, his hair combed with his fingers, but looking uncomfortable.

"I'd have to leave sooner than expected to the office. I wanted to make you breakfast" she said handing him a cup of coffee.

"That could be the next time" he said with a smile and she smiled wider, her heart jumping in her chest. And she thought to herself 'can be the next time tomorrow morning?'

"You think you could stay with Henry until 8 a.m.? That's when the day care opens" she asked him.

"Sure, just give me the address. I'd offer to stay with him, but I have a couple appointments with the real estate agent" she was surprised by the news. That will make it official, when he rents something and moves in.

"Yeah, I'ts close from here. I'll leave Henry dressed and his diaper's bag it's made, you have to take that with him to the day care. I'll call Ashley to let her know you are taking him. You can make him breakfast, or buy it at Granny's that's fine too" she said and she walked out of the kitchen to dress Henry.

"Yeah, I can do all that. But just a question, what does an eight months baby eats for breakfast?" he asked and she smiled brightly.

"It's simple really, he can have porridge, scramble eggs, pancakes, yogurt, fruit, you could smashed a banana and give it to him with yogurt, just go simple and it'll be fine, he doesn't have allergies" she offered the options that came to mind "I know you jumped from not having a baby from having an eight months one in a matter of a few days, but you'll be fine. And I really appreciate the help"

After dressing Henry, and checking one more time everything needed for the day was in the diaper's bag, she kissed the baby's head and gave a final look to Killian, who was wearing a happy smile "Well, I'm off" she looked at her clock, 7:00 a.m. was written in it.

"Swan…"she looked into his eyes and notice how serious it was going to be whatever he was about to say "I want you to know I love this, being whit you and Henry. I loved waking up with the two of you right next to me. We still need to figure things out, but…I just need to be clear about that phone call you saw the other night" she tried to interrupt him, she didn't want to hear about it, but he didn't let her "I talked to her.." her heart rate increased, she doesn't need to know he talked to another woman recently, another woman he was spending his time with "and she won't be calling anymore, It's over" he said, and boy he shouldn't have said the last one.

"So, wasn't it over before?" oh damn she really needs to go and walk away from this conversation. He opened his mouth to say something but she interrupted him "don't say anything, I don't need to know" she said but immediately took it back "You know what? I do want to know, I want to know every detail, when it happened, how it happened, where it happened, for how long. But wanting to know is not the same as wanting to hear it, I don't want to hear it"

"You've held my heart in your hands since the day we met, Emma. No one has touched it but you" and that was the best answer he could ever give her "I don't think any of us know what we are doing here, but I like it. I'm opened to answer any question you may have about this past year, even if it hurts, I can be nothing but honest with you"

"Good" she said felling somehow better, to know she can have an option to ask questions she probably will never dare ask feels good.


	23. Chapter 23

**Emma.**

Killian's been back in her life for almost two weeks, she could describe their relationship as going by instinct, they are not really together, they haven't even kissed, but they spend a lot of time together, the three of them.

The woman from the call has never left her mind. She's there pulsing behind everything else, she's considered if maybe knowing more about it will help to reassure her, but she ends up deciding that it could be worst. Mary Margaret is right, Killian is here now and she has to focus on that.

To have friends in town that helps her with Henry it doesn't compare to parenting with someone else, she is fascinated with how fast Henry and Killian developed a tight relationship. To watch them together is the most amazing thing she's ever witnessed.

Killian said he found a place, and that he is showing it to her later today, she is exited with the news, because it means is real, he is here to stay.

"Earth to Emma" her boss's voice pulling her out from her thoughts, she looked up and he was standing in front of her desk. She blushed knowing she was caught thinking of Killian.

"I'm sorry…I'm trying to remember if I put a change of clothes in Henry's bag" she lied.

"umhm" was Graham's answer and she blushed again "May I ask you something?" he questioned sitting on the chair placed in front of her desk.

"You may" she replied staring at the files on her desk, trying to remember what was she doing before spacing out.

"Is Killian staying for long?" the question picked her interest and she stopped what she was doing.

"He is moving into town, actually" she replied narrowing her eyes.

"Oh….Good for Henry" he said and the smile he gave her after didn't reach his eyes. That's when Emma finally realized why it took Killian a short exchange of words to notice, Graham likes her. She really doesn't need this right now, so she hopes that he doesn't pursue her.

"Killian is a wonderful guy. Henry and I…we are happy to have him back, ok?" she replied as nice as she could, but trying to make a point. Graham nodded.

"All right, if you are happy I'm happy" he said looking intently at her "But if he hurts you or Henry, I'm kicking his ass out of this town"

"You won't have to, but thanks" she gave him a tight smile. Graham walked away from her desk. That was weird, totally unexpected. She should have seen it coming, she relied a bit on Graham before, he was the only person she knew in this town, he was always happy to help and she appreciated it. She never noticed he was into her, too busy thinking about Killian to notice.

Later that day she picked Henry and Killian from Granny's and she followed his directions to arrive at the place he rented. She found the street familiar and she told him the story of how many times she has walked with Henry in this street because she is in love with a house.

"Look, that's the house" she said pointing at the big grey house with white picket fence, he looked at the house and then looked back at her with wide eyes. She stopped in front of the house.

"Really?" he asked with a grin on his lips.

"Yeah, really. What's going on?" she asked felling left out of some joke or something.

"Emma, this is the house I'm moving in" he said with a big smile.

"What? No, you must be confused, this house is for sale"

"Was… was for sale, see?" he said pointing at the On Sale poster at front. It was covered with a big 'Sold' crossing it.

"You bought it?" she asked to loud for the small space in the car and Killian laughed.

"If I would have wanted to surprise you it wouldn't have gone as well as this. Come on, let's go inside" he said opening the door walking out then reaching in on the backseat for Henry. She was frozen holding the steering wheel, her mouth half open. Then Killian called her name and she looked at him, a big smile on his face "Come on, love. We are waiting for you" she looked at him and he was standing next to the car with Henry on his arms.

She stepped out of the car still surprised, she thought he rented a place, when he said it was in this street she realized it was a house, but she would have never guessed he bought one, and not just a house, her house, the house she is in love with. They walked inside and it was empty, no furniture anywhere.

"I thought you said you left Granny's today. Where are you going to sleep? On the floor?" she asked looking around, he gave her Henry to hold and he took a box from a corner where his suitcases were.

"Well, I've got this air mattress. It's just for one night, I'm going to Boston tomorrow to fetch my things. I still have the furniture from the loft" he said looking giddy.

"Why didn't you just stayed one more night at Granny's?" she asked with a smile, his happiness was contagious.

"To be honest love, this is the first house I own, so I was excited to sleep in here as soon as they gave me the keys. So…Do you like it?" he asked with a beautiful smile, his eyes sparkling.

"I do, this house is even more beautiful on the inside…I still think is silly for you to sleep tonight on that dreadful thing, I have slept on air mattresses before, and it's not good for your back" she took a step closer to him "Not that I want to ruin your first night at your first home, but I can offer a more comfortable option" she said slowly. She's been waiting for an excuse to have him back at her bed, this is an opportunity she is not going let pass by. He took a step closer to her, leaving them one in front of the other.

"Really? I might be interested" he said taking a lock of her hair and placing it behind her ear.

"I still owe you a breakfast" her heart was pounding rapidly in her chest. He grinned getting even closer.

"It's a very tempting offer, I'll be a stupid man if I don't take it" he was there, getting closer. It was happening, she will kiss him again, but of course she didn't. Henry made a noise, annoyed by being ignored and crushed between them. Killian smiled widely and looked at Henry "Really, lad? We have to work on your timing" He kissed Henry's head instead and his phone started ringing. Not that his phone rings a lot when they spend time together, but when it did she tenses up, every time, this was not the exception, so she walked away from him "It's Will" he announced, she knows he does it to reassure her, this feeling is new and annoying, she doesn't want to be a jealous girlf…co parent.

She walked up the stairs, Killian's conversation with Will as a background noise. There are three bedrooms, She walked into them daydreaming, the master bedroom is big and well lighted she can see their old bed in here, the other bedroom was perfect for Henry. There is a smaller one, big enough for an office for Killian or a nursery…When that word crossed her mind she froze, what crazy nonsense was crossing her mind, because she didn't think of a nursery for Henry, she already decided which one will be Henry's bedroom in her daydream. This is Killian's house not hers, they won't need a nursery, they haven't even kissed yet and she is moving in with him in her dreams and needing nurseries for imaginary babies. She needs to get a grip of herself.

"Do you like the house?" she was startled by Killian's voice.

"Yeah I love it" she said trying to hide her blush by giving him her back.

"Good….The realtor said this one could be good for a nursery" he said and Emma widens her eyes.

"What?"

"But I think is best to give Henry the other bedroom, it's bigger than this one, he's going to grow fast, right?" he explained, of course he was thinking about Henry.

"Yeah, I think that one is perfect for him. You could make this one an office for you" she said smiling, felling silly for her earlier thoughts.

"I don't know, we'll see…" he looked thoughtful, but soon Henry was bored and called for Killian's attention, so he approached and took him from her.

They left the house after a few minutes and went back to her loft. After putting Henry to sleep she started felling nervous. They are going to sleep together without Henry tonight, to be honest she just wants to sleep next to him, to do something else will complicate things unnecessarily.

"So, how long will you be gone?" she asked, standing next to him, watching Henry sleep.

"I guess I'll arrange everything tomorrow and will be back the next day. I don't want to be gone for long" he whispered back.

"We will miss you" she said and he reached for her hand holding it tight. Then he pulled her away from the crib towards the kitchen, a few steps away from Henry.

"You don't even begin to know how much I will miss the two of you too" he said standing too close or maybe not close enough. Her heart was drumming inside her chest.

"Maybe you could show me how much" she said feeling bold, staring into his eyes totally compelled by him. And her words where encouragement enough, he closed the little distance separating them and kissed her, her mind stopped and everything she was aware of was him, his arm surrounding her waist and pushing her body to his, his tongue moving inside her mouth expertly, the way she remembers, the way she likes. One of her hands went up to his head, her finger tangling in his hair, something she'd been wanting to do, craving the softness of his hair for so long.

"That much and a lot more" he said pressing his forehead to hers when the need for air was too much to ignore, and then gave a chaste kiss to her mouth. She kissed him again, long and intense, her head spinning when the kiss ended. He caressed her cheek "I can't believe I just kissed you" he whispered.

"Let's go to bed" she whispered back. He looked into the direction of her bedroom and then back at her.

"Are we ready for that?" he asked looking wrecked just by the idea and she smiled.

"I'm ready for sleeping next to you, maybe cuddled, and kissing you good morning" she took the out he gave her. To go further it'd be too complicated right now, she was happy with kissing him for now.

"That sounds perfect, love" he said with a smile.

They got ready for bed, taking turns in the bathroom. She waited for him already under the covers, checking her phone to keep herself occupied. Soon he joined her and it felt so natural seeing him getting into bed next to her, the remembrance of the past crossing her mind. They lay facing each other, he took her hand and kissed it before placing it between them with their finger intertwined.

"I want to drive back here in my car. When I left Boston I left my car on Will's care. Since I'm settling here, it'd be best to have it with me. The house is a bit far away from here, it would take long walks back and forth" he said.

"Can you drive? I mean I thought you couldn't"

"I can, I was a bit under confident before. But I thought I couldn't hold a baby in my arms and I'm fine with Henry, I'm sure I can drive my car. The most important things are made with the right hand anyways"

"Ok, but is a long drive back here. Be careful, take it slow" she suggested and he smiled.

"I will" he replied, for a few seconds they were quiet just staring at each other. Then Emma moved closer.

"I still don't know what are we doing here, and I think is best if we don't overthink it"

"I agree" he whispered.

"Just, let's take things slow. This is not just about us"

"It's about Henry too"

"Do you always sleep wearing that thing?" she asked noticing he was wearing the black glove. He shook his head slowly "Take it off" she commanded, and he hesitated "Killian, I know the scars by heart, I tended to them. You are still you, glove or no glove" she looked into his eyes and moved to take out the offending item. Stopping before doing it, just to make sure he was ok with her intrusion, he just took a deep breath a nodded softly. She removed the glove and sat down on the bed with her legs crossed and took his hand in hers "It healed well, it looks so much better" she said and he was quiet, she caressed the scars "Does it hurt?"

"No" he whispered, and she put a kiss on top his hand.

"I understand that you don't want people staring or asking questions, but with us you don't have to wear it all the time, ok?" she said and he nodded his eyes sparkling.

He grabbed her arm with his good hand and pulled her down, colliding her mouth with his, she could feel all the longing and all the regret of the time wasted on that kiss. She could recognize it because that's exactly how she feels.

"Why did we lose so much time?" she asked when the kiss got to an end.

"Maybe if we stayed together then, feeling unhappy, we wouldn't be here now" he said kissing her head when she cuddled to his chest.

"Maybe…"

The next day, early in the morning she let Killian go with a chaste kiss to his mouth and a quick hug. He left after kissing Henry's head and looking at them for a second too long. It feels good to be able to kiss him again, but at the same time she feels a bit overwhelmed.

After a long day, getting back home with Henry without Killian anywhere to be seen it felt so lonely, her loft felt so void, there's when she realized how fast and deep he had engrained in their lives. He video called before Henry's bedtime, the baby was excited looking at Killian on the screen hearing his voice.

The next day she was impatient, watching her phone over and over again, hoping to find a text from Killian, she didn't text him, because she knew he'd be driving, so she just waited. It was Saturday and she had the day off, so that made the waiting a bit unbearable. She was about to walk in the walls when she decided to take Henry for a walk, so she got themselves ready to go out, she left the stroller in the car, so she was grabbing her car keys when it was a knock in the door. She jumped a bit and looked at the watch, it was way too early for Killian to be back. So she opened the door and the person she found there, she hoped to never ever see again.

Milah was standing there, in front of her, in high heels, wearing too much perfume for a Saturday morning, definitely too dressed up for Storybrook, she has to admit, the woman is beautiful.

"Hello, dear. I think we need to talk" the woman said looking up and down her, she wishes she could shield Henry from the woman's stare but it was too late for that, she was holding him in her arms, because they were on their way out.

* * *

 **Killian.**

To drive again it feels empowering, there are a lot of things he stopped doing that he is definitely going to try again, many of those things will take time to master one handed, but with practice he can do anything. If he managed to change a diaper and dress a baby, anything is possible. The moving truck was tailing him, he can't to watch Henry sleep on his crib, the real one, the one they picked for him together.

It didn't take long for his thoughts to circle back to Emma, to kiss her again was wonderful, but to sleep all night right next to her after kissing her good night was marvelous. He can't wait to repeat that one, in their house. Because let's be honest here, he didn't buy that house for himself, he bought it for them, to start over again, and do things right this time.

Everything he went through the year without her feels ridiculous now. An image of Milah crossed his mind and he moved uncomfortable on his seat, holding the steering wheel thighter. That was stupid, he is drinking no more, he makes poor decision inebriated.

It really was a long drive, but to finally drive through the townline, leaving behind the "Welcome to Storybrooke" sign it felt as coming home, in a way not even Boston ever felt. He smiled and relaxed a bit on his seat, he drove through main street, and he wishes he could just park in front of Emma's building, but he has to take the moving truck to the house, so he drove past it.

He asked for full services of the moving company, they will have to move and place every furniture inside, he was a bit useless carrying a bed upstairs with just one hand, these fine lads promised to do the job so it was perfect. He knows Emma will walk in and do her thing with everything anyway, so the guys will leave everything in place for her to move later.

When he explained where everything went and the lads were unloading the truck he finally have a minute to call Emma, the phone ringed and ringed but she never picked up. He tried again, but this time it went straight to voice mail. He frowned, feeling concerned. He called David next, he said he haven't seen Emma today and asked if he wants him to go check on her, Killian thanked him but he'll do it himself. He made sure the movers could be left alone for a few minutes, and he jumped in his car and drove to her place.

It was half afternoon, maybe she felt asleep or something, but he needs to know she and Henry are alright. He parked close to her place and while walking towards the building he marked her number again, straight to voice mail. He sped his pace. When he was in front of her door a bit breathless by running up the stairs, he knocked. He could hear Henry making noises, so he waited.

Emma opened the door, but the sight in front of him made him stop and frown in concern. Her eyes were red rimmed and an angry frown in her face, the energy that surrounded her stopped him. When Emma is angry you can almost touch her energy, it leaves you breathless.

"What's wrong?" he asked uncertain if stepping in or just stand there.

"Milah" just a name and his world fell apart. How does she know? He wished then he took the chance to tell her himself, to explain his stupidity as best as he can, but how does he explain now? She is closed off.

"Emma…" he whispered because he couldn't find his voice. He couldn't help but think that Emma was running away from him again.

"I didn't want to know" she said closing her eyes, and his heart broke because of her, he could feel her pain and he hated to be a part of it, Henry started making noises calling for attention, he certainly heard his voice and now wants to be greeted, Emma ignored him "I would have been happy not knowing" she said and he heard it as an ending and he hated it.

"We can still be happy" he said felling desperate, he wanted to grab her, to touch her to let her know he was right there.

"You need to go, I don't want to talk to you right now" Henry's noises were louder, he tried to looked inside to where the noises were coming, and he notice it was from the baby's crib. Emma notice "He'll be fine" she said and was about to close the door when the baby started crying, she stopped.

"Let me say hello" he said scared, scared that Emma will refuse now and will refuse in the future, he can't live without Henry, he is his son. The baby was obviously crying because he was hearing him but not getting his attention, that frustrated him, because he wants to run to his side. How can his life be so out of place, he left hours ago.

Emma hesitated, Henry's crying was louder now so she stepped in walking toward his crib, leaving the door open, he took a few steps in.

Emma took Henry from his crib and hugged him trying to comfort him, but the baby's arms were reaching towards Killian, his face red and cover in tears, he took a couple steps towards him by instinct but Emma gave him a look that stopped him in his tracks, he watched for a few more seconds and he didn't care Emma's warning, he approached them and took one of Henry's little hands.

"Hush lad, I'm right here" Killian said in a soothing voice, as soothing as he managed. Henry's full body was reaching for him now so Emma relented and Killian finally grabbed him, holding him tight, whispering nonsense to him. Killian looked at Emma and fresh tears were running through her face. What the fuck happened while he was gone? They were happy, and he found them broken hearted.

Henry calmed down faster than he expected, all he wanted was to be noticed by him, when he got it he relaxed "Don't you ever think I don't want to greet you, or hold you, or play with you. I love you so much" he said to the boy and the baby was staring at him with attention as if he could understand every word. He kissed Henry's head and looked at Emma, she didn't look angry anymore, she looked sad, he never seen her as sad as he saw her right now and that scared him, he doesn't want to lose them, he just got them back "Emma…"

"Not now, we can't do this in front of Henry. But you do need to go" she said and he nodded he'll give her space for now, just a few hours because he will definitely be coming back later. He put the baby back in his crib and gave him the orange octopus for him to hold. He gave another look at Emma, but she was staring at the floor.

He walked towards the front door that was still open, when he was about to come out Emma added "Your girlfriend said she'll be waiting for you at Granny's" her voice breaking and he stopped, of course, Milah was here. He turned around to face Emma.

"I'll deal with her. Whatever she said, I can assure you right now it wasn't as she painted it. I'll be back, the two of you are everything I need and more. You are my family" With those final words Emma looked up into his eyes.

* * *

A/N: I hope you are enjoying this, it took me a while to figure out how to make Milah mess up thing in the right way, I hope I achieved it. Comment me your thoutghs, it really help with the muse when I read your reviews.

We are closer to the end, I hope to post weekly, every weekend!


	24. Chapter 24

**Emma.**

It just took her a second of watching Milah standing in front her to know this has something to do with Killian, there was no other reason for that woman to be here.

"As much as I would like to avoid getting to know your…home" the woman said with disdain taking a look inside "It'd be more comfortable to talk inside."

"I don't think we have anything to talk about" Emma said and Henry made a noise that caught the other woman's attention, and trying to get Henry as far away as she can from the woman she walked back inside and put him on his crib. When she turned, Milah was inside glancing around with an unimpressed look in her eyes.

"Look, dear. I bet you already know I'm here about Killian. It was hard to find him, but you on the other hand…" the brunette said and Emma walked to the other side of the loft just to keep Milah's eyes away from Henry.

"What do you want?" she asked facing Milah.

"I want the best for him, and you are definitely not it" the woman said looking at her up and down, and it made her blood boil.

"And who is? You?"

"Maybe not. But at least I'm just trying to make him better, All those months with me he grew his company even more, he's making more money than he ever dreamed making. All you can offer are responsibilities that are not even his" the woman said giving a quick look at Henry "And you… you don't deserve him"

Emma was so angry she was shaking 'all those months with me' was repeating in her head "Who are you to tell me who or what I deserve?" she asked, her hands fisting.

"Who am I? I am the woman who picked up the pieces you left behind, what did you do to leave him so broken? You just used him for money and comfort when you realized someone else knocked you up, but you were not counting on his accident, he was useless then, you not only broke his heart, you broke his spirit, I've never seen him the way he was when he came for me….Now you found him as himself again and didn't waste time in digging your claws. So no, I don't believe you deserve him".

"You don't know what you are talking about" Emma mumbled, Milah's words stung and reverberated in her head 'I know I don't deserve him' she thought, she's been feeling guilty since the day he came back, she left him when he needed her the most, he says he understands, that her priority it should have been Henry, that he wasn't fit to take care of them back then. But still she feels guilty, because she knows they lost a lot of time they can't take back, and he spent most of that time with this awful woman. She accuses her of wanting Killian's money, she can't even be offended by that, is ridiculous.

"What is the plan? For him to leave behind everything he worked so hard for to move to this quaint town to take care of your responsibilities?"

"I don't have to listen to you. Get out of my house" Emma ordered in a low voice.

"He loves you, I know that. But you are not being fair to him. You don't love him, you wouldn't have left him at his worst if you did. He deserves better than you, Emma. You know it" yes he deserves better than her, but she won't make the same mistake again of making choices for him. She paid precious time together the last time she did.

"You are just an old bitter woman, you can't accept that he left you to come back to us" Emma hissed. She definitely hit a nerve because the brunette's face wavered for a second and frowned.

"The things he did to me this past months I don't think he'll ever touch you like that. He will be back" the woman threw venom from her mouth and Emma's temper got the best of her.

"Leave….Now" the last word she screamed it. Henry started crying because of her yelling and she walked to him. Milah hesitated, but it seemed as if being close to a crying baby wasn't something she was willing to do.

"Tell Killian that I'll be waiting for him at the B&B, I won't leave until he meets me there" the brunette said before walking out of her loft. Emma, holding Henry In her arms walked to the door and closed it, leaning on it.

"It's alright baby, everything's alright" she said trying to calm Henry down.

After the episode with Milah, Emma didn't have energy to walk Henry around town, she was barely keeping it together just for him. She busied herself with lunch, the whole conversation replaying in her head, After feeding him lunch, Henry fell asleep, he was a bit fuzzy today, so she let him rest. She went to bed too, sleep far away from her mind.

Milah's voice replaying in her head 'the things he did to me, he'll never touch you like that'. An image of Killian and Milah together almost made her threw up her lunch. The last time they made love was at New York, a couple days before the accident, the reason for not making love anymore was it because of his hand, or was it because he found her too big and disgusting to have sex with her, or was it because he saw Milah again that weekend?

He ran to Milah's arms as soon as he could. When she was pining over him, when she kept him in her mind constantly, felling sorry and guilty, reproaching herself, feeling terrible for taking Henry away from him, waiting for him to show up to meet Henry, he was happy and fucking this awful woman, who now is self-righteous enough to tell her what to do. Her eyes filled with tears, tears of anger, tears she didn't want to shed. She hates felling unwanted and rejected again.

"You don't deserve him" she heard the accentuated voice of the older woman in her head again. She knows what she did, and she regretted it from the get go, she won't ever forget it, she hates not being there for him. But Milah doesn't deserve him either and that is a fact.

She would have liked not knowing, whatever she imagined it was definitely not Milah. Does he still have feelings for her? Why did he go back to her as soon as he was free to do so? That has to mean something. Tears were now running free on her face, tears of frustration and anger. She only had over five months with Killian before, so Milah got longer, a long relationship years ago, and more than five months recently. Maybe the odd woman out is her.

She couldn't think straight, she rounded back to the same thoughts all messed up on her mind. Cleaning her face from tears, she was so angry with herself for letting Milah get to her, and to Killian for somehow driving the woman to her doorstep, the woman was an expert manipulator, and being aware of that didn't change anything, because the woman hit jackpot on her insecurities. Her phone started ringing, and she didn't need to look at it to know it was Killian, the ringtone she gave him was the one making noises. She started sobbing when she turned the phone off, it was so unfair, she was so happy when she woke up, Now she is angry and sad, Killian was with Milah until a couple weeks ago when he returned, if she didn't accept him, would he still be at New York with her? Henry woke up with the ringing and her sobbing, so she walked to him and cleaned her face.

"Hey kid" she said caressing his head to greet him. Henry took his octopus and offered it to her, as if noticing her mood and giving her what comforts him, that made her smile and she hugged the stuff animal for a second before giving it back to the baby and kissing his head. When she heard a knock on the door, Henry made excited noises, hoping for sure that Killian is the one at the door. And she knows he is, if he called he was already in town.

In the short walk to the door her anger came back with force, shielding her from pain. Killian's concern was palpable, but she can't talk to him right now, she is too upset to do so, and he needs to take care of the woman who is still in town too close from her home.

Henry was getting upset by not being able to see Killian, and when she was about to close the door for him, the baby started crying. Killian followed her inside, she didn't want him there. She wanted him to go, she needed to think, to put her thoughts in order. She doesn't trust herself when she is angry, that's why she prefers to cool off, because she has questions, but she doesn't want to talk crying like a fool.

She couldn't calm Henry so Killian step up and she couldn't refuse. Then Killian said "Don't you ever think I don't want to greet you, or hold you, or play with you. I love you so much" and that was too much, she couldn't hold her tears anymore, she's scared of losing this, what if Killian listens to Milah and goes away? What if Henry can't have a father anymore? They need to talk, but not in front of Henry. She has to think about her son.

Killian left promising to take care of Milah, and as much as she hates sending him to that woman. She doesn't want to face her again, Milah has to leave.

"I'll deal with her. Whatever she said, I can assure you right now it wasn't as she painted it. I'll be back, the two of you are everything I need and more. You are my family" he said and she felt it as a promise, so she looked into his eyes for a few seconds and then he left.

She was anxious, she couldn't just stay here locked up. Henry was still moody so she dressed him up and resumed her earlier plans of taking him for a walk. She would appreciate the fresh air too.

The sun was setting when they walked out of her loft. She went to her car to retrieve the stroller, placed Henry in it, the baby looked happy already, so she smiled. She walked in front of Granny's and wasn't sure if walking in for a cup of coffee to go for their walk. What if she finds Milah and Killian in there? But she reconsidered, Milah wouldn't even walk into the diner. So she got in, ordered her coffee. Graham came in from the back of the diner.

"Oh, the Swans are here…or is it the Jones now?" he asked as a greeting and she really didn't have a sense of humor at the moment.

"Last time I checked I wasn't married" she answered while counting her money to pay for the coffee.

"Let me take care of that" he said getting closer to her to pay for her drink. At this closeness she noticed the unmistakable scent of alcohol.

"Have you've been drinking?" she asked wrinkling her nose. He smiled ignoring her question.

"Are you alright?" he asked handing her the coffee. She wondered if it was that obvious that she wasn't exactly herself right now. She said nothing, not knowing what to say, so she took a sip from her coffee "I'm asking because I saw your boyfriend having a heated argument with a very well dress lady. You know too passionate to be two strangers discussing the weather" She frowned. He was fishing for a reaction and she was not going to comply.

"I came in just to buy a coffee to go, thank you" she thanked him and grabbed the stroller pushing it to go, Leroy was walking in when she arrived so he helped her get it in. She walked to the door and opened it, the three steps at front made her stop, she was deciding how to get the stroller down those steps with Henry on it, when Graham grabbed the stroller and took it down for her, kneeling in front of Henry to caress his head as a greeting.

"Why don't you guys stay and we have a drink" he said and one of Emma's eyebrows went up "Coffee of course, and later dinner. We've done it before. That'll make you feel better" he said with a smile that'd be more charming if it wasn't stained by alcohol. He wasn't drunk but was half way there.

"I don't think so and I'm fine" she said and started walking pushing the stroller rounding Graham. But he ran in front of her again.

"Come on, if you were fine you'd be in there having coffee with me" he insisted. She started walking again.

"Is none of your business" she said bitterly and tried to get away from him.

"He doesn't deserve you, not you, not Henry" he said following her. She stopped and turned around to face him. That stupid word, she hates it.

"Why do you care?" she asked and felt stupid after asking the question because she already knew the answer. Although she wasn't ready for what he did next.

"I care because…" He said and cupped her face in his hands and kissed her. For one second she didn't react, she felt like this was a bad joke, but it was real and it wasn't ok. She pushed him as hard as she could from her.

"What that hell was that? How much have you've been drinking?" But it got worst, because it can always get worst.

"Bloody hell?!" Graham was pulled from behind almost going to the floor by the force of it, then Killian placed himself as a wall in front of her with his back at her, waiting for Graham's reaction. She checked on Henry and grabbed the stroller, clueless on what to do. Graham deserves a punch on the face, but he is still the sheriff and her boss, and she doesn't want Killian getting in trouble. Graham found his balance again and stood tall in front of Killian "Just go mate, I'd really hate to punch you in front of my son"

"Emma…I'm sorry…" he said ignoring Killian and Emma noticed Killian's back tensing and his hand fisting, when he was about to move she grabbed his arm.

"It's not worth it. Let's go" she whispered to him, still seeing just his back, he relaxed just a little bit.

"Don't you ever touch her again" he threatened before turning around and taking the stroller from her, she followed him walking away from Graham. Somehow she was still holding her coffee, so she took a sip to calm herself. How eventful can a simple day be? They just walked in silence for a couple of minutes. After half a block Killian stopped, and finally looked at her, still frowning "I swear I would have kick his ass if Henry wasn't with you" he said running his hand over his face.

"Where did you come from?" she asked

"From your home, I didn't find you there and saw the car outside, so I figured you couldn't be far, so I walked. I saw you coming out of Granny's and that idiot assaulting you"

"He didn't assault me"

"Really? So you wanted to be kissed by him?" he asked frowning.

"Of course not" she answered and he look up front again and started walking. Henry wanted to be carried in arms and Killian complied as he always does, so she ended up pushing an empty stroller following Killian and Henry back home, they didn't say another word to each other.

When they entered the loft Henry was sleeping with his head on Killian's shoulder, he put him carefully on the baby's crib and caressed his little head, she was watching mesmerized "Should he be sleeping at this hour?" he asked startling her.

"I don't think he's been feeling too god today, he's been fuzzy and moody" she explained getting closer, then she put a hand on the baby's forehead but he's temperature seemed fine. Killian nodded and started walking away from her. That's when she noticed he was trying to keep his distance from her. Somehow, her walk with Henry turned into a Killian's walk with Henry followed by her, she should have noticed earlier. She took a few steps to get closer to him but he took a few steps towards the door

"I'm going to go" he said, the frown returning. He was acting odd so she couldn't stop herself.

"Are you mad because of the Graham thing?" she asked frowning and crossing her arms on her chest. He avoided looking into her eyes and took a deep breath, then looked into Henry's direction, then pointed to the door. He walked outside and she followed. He was standing with his back at her, she closed the door softly and he turned around.

"Why did he think he can kiss you?" he asked anger visible on his eyes.

"Really? And here I thought we had another issue between us" she said with sarcasm in her voice.

"Well, I haven't kissed anyone else" he spited out.

"No, you haven't. You just had been sleeping with someone else" and it was really hard to keep her indoor voice, her temper getting the best of her. How dare he accused her of giving hopes to Graham? Killian was taken aback, he opened his mouth once, twice before finally speaking.

"I didn't leave you, Emma" He mumbled. And it felt like a slap on the face.

"Yeah, I left. But you weren't really there, and I didn't know how to bring you back, you were rejecting me and I was scared that you would reject my son too. I took the easy way out and I regretted it every day, I hoped you would realize that I needed you, that we needed you…" her voice breaking "and you know what it hurts the most right now, to realize that you found yourself in her bed, it doesn't matter that you came back now, you still took a plane to her instead of going to us"

Killian took a deep breath, his face contorting, he looked wrecked, she wasn't really trying to hurt him, but she did, and she didn't feel bad about it, she just wanted to go back inside and curled up on her bed, too many emotions today coming and going, she was tired.

"I thought you wouldn't take me back" he mumbled.

"I never said I wouldn't, Killian. Don't try to put this one on me, you decided to go to her" she said feeling and sounding exhausted. After a long silence she added "I'll leave Henry with Mary Margaret tomorrow if you still want to talk. I'm too tired right now" he was still frowning, and nodded his agreement. He took a couple steps closer to her. Using the back of his hand he cleaned a tear she didn't notice was running down her face. And she closed her eyes with the contact.

"Let me know when we can talk tomorrow, ok? I'll be here" he asked and she nodded softly. He gave her a little smile and turned around walking away from her down the stairs. She stood there for a few more seconds before going inside.

* * *

 **Killian.**

Killian walked into his new home, this is the first night he will spend here and it didn't feel special at all, not what he was expecting, because his plan for tonight was spending the first night in his first home with his family. At this time tonight he should have been walking Emma and Henry around their home, showing them the furniture he brought with him, making plans for other things they need to buy, and watching Henry finally sleep at his original baby crib.

But tonight is a far cry from whatever he hoped, he is alone, angry, frustrated, sad. As If the whole Milah situation wasn't bad enough, he had to witness the bloody sheriff kissing Emma.

He's tired, physically and emotionally. The moving, the driving from Boston, Emma's rejection, fighting with Milah, Bloody Graham kissing Emma, arguing with Emma. He considered drinking a whole bottle of rum, but he has none in the house and he is too tired to go out to buy one, so he took his second option, falling unceremoniously into bed and not moving until tomorrow. So he did, he walked around his dark house, not even changing his clothes before going to bed and fell asleep almost immediately.

He could hear his phone ringing, the sound going louder and louder, he can feel the vibration of it in his pocket so he reached his hand to get it. He opened his eyes when the bright screen was in front of his face, Emma's picture was shining on it, he sat down fast and answered without even thinking.

"Killian…" she said sounding off, but was scared him the most was that he could hear Henry's crying on the back.

"What is it, love?"

"Henry has a fever and he won't stop crying" she sounded as if she wanted to cry herself. And he was out of bed running downstairs.

"I'll be right there in a minute. Do you want to take him to the hospital?"

"No, I just talk to his pediatrician. I just…I know he'll be better if you are here. I tried, but I can't calm him down. He needs you, I need you" she said the last one softly. And he felt a warmth spreading in his chest.

"I'll be right there, love" he said opening the car's door. He is not sure how he got so fast to his car. Even when the drive to Emma's loft is a short one, he knows that they can't keep doing this, he can't keep doing this, living apart, he just needs to convince Emma.

He almost jump out of his car when he arrived, runing upstairs, his chest pounding loud in his chest. He can hear Henry's crying, he knocked on the door and Emma was there a second after. Henry saw him and his little arms reached for him, he took him in his arms without even thinking it.

"Hey lad, hush everything will be alright" he bounced him gently walking inside and after a few seconds the baby laid his head on his shoulder and stopped his sobbing. He took a look at Emma and she was standing in the middle of the loft hugging herself with a faint smile that looked saddened by the stains of tears on her face. He approached her and pulled her into a half a hug with his free arm, putting a kiss on her head "it's alright" he felt as her arms surrounded his body and he relaxed "what did the doctor say?"

"When I listed his symptoms the doctor made me check into Henry's mouth and as he expected I found that there is a teeth below the gum, you can barely see it…So the teething is finally here" she explained "the doctor wants me to take him in tomorrow morning to check him up" she separated from the hug and walking to the kitchen "I'm sorry I woke you up" she said without looking at him, busying herself with a dirty cup in the sink.

"Don't apologize. I want to be here" he said taking a few steps closer to her. Henry moved, and whined a bit. So he started bouncing him gently as he knows the baby likes.

"I don't know how you do it. I think I tried for over 40 minutes to sooth him, and you walk in and is like magic" she said drying her hands. He smiled.

"You should have called right away, Swan. I don't think I've done anything special, he's just tired"

It was over midnight and whatever medicine the doctor suggested has its effect, after a few more minutes Henry was asleep in his arms. He bounced him walking around the loft for a few more minutes just to be sure he was not going to wake up again before placing him on his crib. The adrenaline it rushed in his blood after the phone call was caught up on him. He was exhausted all of a sudden and he couldn't stop the yawn from coming.

"Thank you for coming. I knew you'll be able to calm him down. He's so taken up with you, I've never seen him so attached to anyone" she said walking to the couch sitting on it and he followed her, sitting next to her.

"No need to thank me, there's nothing else I rather be doing" he said and looked at her in the eyes, she locked her eyes with his for a few seconds before looking away, there was a long silence.

"I wish I could discuss with you what happened today right now, but I'm too tired. It was a long unpleasant Saturday" she said before letting a yawn take over. He mirrored her yawn.

"I don't want to go, Emma. What if the baby wakes up again?" he asked, she looked at him before asking.

"Where are you going to sleep?" he hated every word of that question.

"I could sleep sitting on this couch or on the floor if you want me to…but I need to know if Milah did so much of a harm that we can't share the bed?" he asked, worried of whatever her answer is going to be. Emma got up from the couch and took a few steps away from him crossing her arms under her breast, it seemed as if it is worse than he expected.

"The thing is that even forgetting you've been sleeping with her all this time, she shouldn't have ended up on my front door. What bothers me the most is that you didn't handle things properly, you didn't broke up with her before coming here, so what? If I didn't let you into our lives you would have been back to her?" she asked.

"Emma, there was nothing to break up, we weren't together like that, but yes maybe I should have made clear it was over. And you are right about being upset about it. But whatever she thinks I want or need, she has no idea of my feelings or my needs. Because all I want and need is right here in front of me" he said with vehemence, and then stood up and walked to her, he put his hand on top of one of her crossed arms "Please, love. We are too tired and we need to rest in case Henry keeps on feeling under the weather. Let's go to bed and we'll talk tomorrow as we planned. What do you say?"

"I'm too tired to argue with you right now" she said turning around and walking to her bedroom. He knew he got his way tonight, but Emma was still upset, so he won't push his luck.

She got back to bed lying down giving her back to his side of the bed. His pajamas from the other night were still in here, folded over a chair and he changed. He checked on Henry one last time before going to bed and laid down next to her, keeping his distance, giving her the space she wanted. He still felt as if he won the first round, things weren't that bad if she let him sleep with her.


	25. Chapter 25

**Emma.**

"He doesn't want to have sex with you. He doesn't want you anymore. I'm better than you, I can make him crazy with desire with just one look" Milah said to her, while standing at her front door, with an obnoxious smirk on her face. She wanted to reply, move to punch her face and then slam the door close. But she couldn't, she was frozen there, listening to every awful thing Milah had to say.

Emma woke up with a gasp, relief flooding through her when she realized it was just a dream. It was still dark, she was still in the same position she fell asleep last night, unable to see Killian. She was just being stubborn when she told him to sleep on the couch, she was relieved when she felt the mattress dipping with his weight.

She looked up towards Henry's crib, just outside her bedroom, he was sleeping still for sure, she was turning around to face Killian when one of his arms surrounded her body hugging her from behind, his body pressing to hers, she stopped moving because she thought maybe he was awake too, but she noticed his breathing was light and regular so she knew he was asleep. Then she noticed something else, he was growing hard in his pants. He inhaled her neck releasing the air slowly, she had to close her eyes doing her best not to moan out loud, every hair on her body stood on end. He was still obviously asleep, and she didn't know what to do, she should move and push him to the other side of the bed, she should press herself into him, wake him up and take advantage of the moment. He made the decision for her when he pushed his hip further into her, she couldn't stop herself from moving her butt. He was awake almost immediately, his arm held her tighter to him, but then he seemed to realize what was happening and he tried to pull away, she held his arm with force, she was already here, she was not letting him pull away as he used to, she won't let him reject her again.

"Emma…" he whispered her name as if he was in pain. She rubbed her butt against him again, a soft moan coming from his mouth. She can feel his head pressing to hers "what are you doing, love?" she didn't reply, she moved again a couple of times and he asked softly "Am I dreaming?" that made her turn in his arms, in need to see his eyes.

"Do you often have this kind of dreams?" she asked looking into his eyes.

"You have no idea" he replied and she kissed him, she was all in now, she'll deal with the consequences later. He kissed her back, their lips colliding with passion into each other, her legs intertwining with his, both of them moving to get some friction between them. She removed his shirt, her fingers happily brushing his chest hair, something she missed dearly.

She couldn't stop now, she didn't want to stop, she needs to prove wrong the Milah from her dream. And she really, really wants him. She pushed him rolling him to his back sitting on top of him, she tried to remove her tshirt but he stopped her grabbing the shirt half way up, a silent question on his eyes, she just continued pushing the tshirt off, tossing it as far away as possible. His eyes were stuck on her chest for a couple of seconds, then their eyes met again and the intensity she saw in his, made her reach for his mouth to kiss him again. His injured arm pushing her closer to his body, and the good hand went to her butt, directing her movements. The skin to skin touch of their chests made them both gasp.

She couldn't take it anymore, she needs more, she needs to feel more skin, his hand cupping her breast when she separated her chest from his, she would have stayed longer enjoying it but she needs to remove their pants. She got up fast, standing next to the bed, and removed her pajama pants faster than she thought it was possible, he was just looking at her every move, when she was done, she grabbed the edge of his pajama pants but his hand stopped her again, she looked into his eyes and he looked wrecked, after a few seconds he removed his hand and she pulled his pants off. She remembers he used to be more proactive, but she understands that he is trying to give her an out every step of the way. The thing is that there is not stopping her, she can't stop, she doesn't want to stop. She wants him, she needs him.

He was about to move, to change his position, but she moved faster and sat on top of his stomach. She needs to be in control right now. She tried to rearrange herself, to push him inside of her, but he grabbed one of her wrists, making her look into his eyes "Is this about yesterday? We don't have to" he asked giving her an out again, or maybe he was giving an out to himself, doesn't he want this as much as she does?

"This is not about anyone but us…" she frowned "Are you rejecting me again?" for one second she felt as covering herself. Maybe she'll hide in the bathroom for a few minutes, he'll have to go home.

"My god, Emma. You have no idea how much I want you" he said, his voice raspy and filled with desire, the concern leaving her.

"Then shut up" she said and moved lower, when she was in position she grabbed him with her hand, making him take a deep breath.

She pushed him inside slowly by sitting fully into him. She sat there without moving for a few seconds, trying to get acquainted again with the intrusion, the last time she had sex it was with him, and it's been over a year. They look into each other eyes, his eyes drilling into her head, turning the moment into the most intimate moment she ever had in her life, soon it was too much and not enough at the same time. The expression on his face was intense, as if the world ended and started with her, and she is certain she is mirroring it. She was about to move when she felt his good hand grabbing her hip and his injured one pushing her hip, keeping her in place. She tried to look into his eyes but they were closed. She caressed his cheek and he opened them. He smiled softly and moved to be on a sitting position with her impaled into him, he looked into her eyes again so many emotions in it "I need to kiss you" he said before kissing her slowly and passionately, releasing his hand so she could move again, his injured hand on the low of her back and the other one holding her butcheek , she couldn't really move, for a second she felt like crying of happiness. He used his arms to move her on top of him, the dancing of their thongs was measuring with the dancing of their hips.

Emma's moans didn't take long to arrive and he whispered into her ear "shhhh, our boy is right outside" she giggled, because to keep quiet right now seemed impossible, but she managed, it'd be worst to wake Henry up. Killian's mouth reached one of her breasts and after a few more seconds she felt her orgasm building, when she was about to explode he reminded her to be quiet, every thrust was bringing her closer and closer, he reminded her again to be quiet when he knew for sure her release was imminent, that was easier said than done, she ended up biting his shoulder to held the noise inside, one of the best orgasms of her life, surely every one of those were brought to life by this man. Her forehead ended up pressing into his shoulder, his arms keeping her in place, because she felt like jelly, she could probably melt in the bed right now "Brilliant, love. You are so bloody beautiful" he said in her ear caressing her hair.

"I'm sorry" she said giving a tiny kiss to the print of her teeth on his shoulder. He chuckled.

"Don't fret about that. I'll carry it with pride….But I'm not done with you" he whispered, and a shiver ran up her back, she remembered that she came but he didn't, he was still big and hard inside of her.

"Go for it, tiger" she said, in one move he got her pined to the bed. He looked into her face.

"Is this real?" he asked again.

"I hope so" she replied with a smile and he smiled back at her.

"We still need to talk" he added. She nodded. He kissed her again. They made love with abandon after that, and she fell asleep with her head on his chest. Still having a couple hours for morning to arrive.

She woke up with her head on a pillow, and the cover up her chin. The light of morning coming from the windows, she stretched her arm to the other side of the bed and opened her eyes when she felt nothing but emptiness, for a second she felt confused, was it a dream after all? Then she heard Henry laughing happily somewhere in the loft so she looked up, Killian was standing on the kitchen with Henry on his arms, singing a song softly to him, a part of the song was followed by a tap on the baby's nose and that made him laugh again. She sat down in bed and when the cover slipped from her she noticed she was completely naked, so it was not a dream. Thank god!

She got up from bed, walking naked towards the closet were her bath robe was hanging, and Killian caught her mid way, looking at her from afar, call her crazy but she saw the blue of his eyes turning darker and she blushed and smiled at him. She kept on walking and grabbed the robe putting it around her. She walked towards them and Henry reached for her as soon as he noticed her. She grabbed him from Killian's arms and kissed his head. Killian did the same but to her head and she felt the blush again.

"Good morning, love. I was smashing a couple of bananas for the lad. Do you want something in special for breakfast?" he asked smashing the fruit on the plate with a fork.

"I want a Granny's grilled cheese. Something made me real hungry this morning" she said and he looked up with a big grin on his face.

"Granny's it is then. Go get ready while Henry eats this" he said taking the baby from her. But before she could move he held her chin and planted a soft kiss on her mouth, she felt light headed after it, she was not expecting it.

While she was taking a shower, thinking about everything and anything, she considered that she should have waited for them to talk and really mend things before jumping him. He would have waited as long as she wanted to, the thing is she was tired of waiting, and with all the talk of him being sexually satisfied by someone else, she needed reassurance, real reassurance. And he delivered, wonderfully. Her muscles sore, a nice sore.

When she was out the bathroom, he went to take a shower too. Henry was playing on his crib with a couple of toys Killian gave him, so she went to get dressed, she was almost done when he came walking into the bedroom with a towel around his waist. He is beautiful, inside and out, her eyes followed a trail up his body hair, she noticed her bite printed on his shoulder and she felt awful, he was drying his hair with the towel she used, she approached him and grabbed his arm to take a closer look to the bite mark.

"Oh my god" she said feeling terrible for injuring him, he giggled.

"It's alright Swan, the best kind of injury" he said winking at her with a satisfied grin on his face, she poke a finger on the bite "Hey" he complained, she smiled giving a soft kiss on the mark, then walking away from him. She grabbed Henry's clothes to go dress him to go out.

They were walking into Granny's when they ran into Graham, Killian who's been smiling nonstop all morning couldn't find amusing seeing the sheriff, and his frown returned. The sheriff was in the middle of the door, holding two cups of coffee to go. Killian was carrying Henry in his arms, she gave him a look just to check his mood and next move, but he stayed put, knowing there's nothing to do or say with Henry in his arms.

"Emma, I was on my way to your place" Graham said looking embarrassed. Emma was about to say something but Killian interrupted her.

"Let me make something clear, mate. You are walking on a thin thread as it is. I don't mean to talk for her, but I have to say this. You are her boss, she is supposed to feel safe working with you. Now, you assaulted her last night, do you thinking that a cup of coffee and stalking her at her home is going to help the matter? I can't do anything about your work place, and I know she can take care of herself. But you are not showing up at her home, ever" Emma was impressed, at first she felt as if he was trying to start a pissing contest, as if they were dogs marking their territory, but it was not really about that. She felt safe, it felt weird to realize you don't have to fight every battle alone, in his speech he left space for her to speak her mind when she wishes, but making clear she was not alone.

Graham had the decency to look ashamed, and finally looked into Killian's eyes "You are right. Going to her home is not a smart move. But I do want to apologize" he said finally looking at her. She put her hand on one of Killian's arms so he knows that she is the one talking now.

"The moment you kissed me you turned it into a work thing. I want to enjoy Sunday with my family. Can we talk about sexual harassment at the office tomorrow?" she asked and he nodded cringing at her words. She really has too many things on her plate to deal with Graham right now. She walked to a booth followed by Killian. Forgetting Graham existed, at least for today.

They had breakfast, she called Henry's doctor and explained he was feeling good today, no fever no moodiness, he was just drooling a lot and biting everything he can get his hands on, trying to scratch the itch his new teeth was causing. The doctor asked her to take him in on Monday then, but to call him if anything changes. It was Sunday, the poor man was going to go to the hospital today just for them, so she accepted.

Killian drove them to the Nolan's. They spent a little while chatting and drinking coffee with their friends, but soon they were getting up to Killian's car without Henry. They put their seatbelts on and then silence took over the car for a few seconds, things were going to get serious again soon, and both of them were bracing themselves for that.

"So, your place or mine?" Killian asked turning the ignition.

"My place…I rather not stain yours with this argument" she said looking straight ahead. He started driving without any other comment.

After a few minutes they were walking inside her loft, and she sat down at the armchair, putting her distance from him. He sat in front of her at the couch. They looked at each other, to be honest she didn't know where to begin.

* * *

 **Killian.**

They made love, he was elated while taking a shower and reliving it in his head. He didn't think Emma's body could be improved in anyway, because to him she was just perfect, but motherhood agreed with her, she is sexier than he remembers. For the first time since yesterday he felt for sure that everything is going to be alright, they are going to be alright, he wasn't so sure last night, but this morning assured him of that. He cringed while passing the soap to his right shoulder, and took a look at it, he saw the bite mark and he smiled widely, he's going to carry this with pride, the prove that it was real, that it really happened.

They had breakfast at Granny's, running into Graham was no fun but he tried to let it go, he was not gonna let him ruin his good mood. Then they left Henry at the Nolan's, and it was finally time to talk and let everything out to start again, that's how he prefers to see it.

"Where do you wanna start, Swan?" he asked after a few seconds of staring at each other.

"What happened with Milah yesterday?" she asked frowning.

"She said some nonsense about me deserving better and living up to my potential, and I have to admit that I lose my cool and screamed a bit, try to leave and she followed. When I was at the parking lot, she said something about Henry not being my responsibility and I lost it. I yell at her to leave me alone, some people saw us, so you know. Then I hope I made her understand I'm happy here, and this is all I want. So she left promising to leave me alone if I was happy but that I know where she is. She left and hopefully she won't be back" he explained.

"You are obviously leaving a lot of it out" she said frowning.

"I am, I don't see the need of repeating every single word. I'm guessing she filled you in on her opinion of us"

"Yeah, she said I'm using you for your money" she replied and he flinched, he frowned, anger burning from inside. How could Milah say that to Emma, he has heard her say it to him numerous times, he always found it ridiculous, he asked her once an not too nicely to never say that again. She did say it again to him today, and that was the thing that made him scream like a mad man to her, asking her to leave him alone, telling her he made a terrible mistake a few months ago and sadly he can't take it back, but he can remove her completely from his life now, he is not exactly proud of also screaming to her in front of a few people on the parking lot that she is a sad old woman that no one will ever love, he is not proud of that one, but at the moment it made him feel better, for a few seconds until he saw the hurt in the woman's eyes.

"Just to make myself perfectly clear here, I don't believe that and never ever did. That's bullshit and you know it" they looked into each other's eyes for a few seconds then she nodded softly.

How long where you with her?" she shot the next question, he was dreading this kind of questions but he was not going to be a coward now, he wants to be honest, he will be honest, even when he is afraid of saying something wrong, something that will push her away.

"I went to New York a few days after Henry was born" he explained.

"Didn't you want to meet Henry?" she was still frowning, and the look in her eyes, he hates it, she is doubting him and he can't blame her.

"With all my heart, Emma. But I was still broken and drunk and useless. I couldn't face you like that, because I would have kneeled in front of you like the sorry man I was, drunk and broken, asking you to get me back. You wouldn't have want me then, love" he felt tears prickling in his eyes, remembering how he felt back then, how she could brake him again with just a few words.

"So what? Is she a better person than me? You knew she would take you but not me" she snapped getting up and walking even farther away from him, standing in the middle of the loft, giving her back to him.

"No, love. I just knew she would take advantage of my situation, and she did. You had Henry to take care of, you didn't need a drunken fool with you" he said getting up too, following her, but keeping his distance, he knows better than to push her.

"So you made a choice for me. A choice that conveniently drove you to her" she said turning around, her arms hugging her.

"Ok, Swan. I was a stupid fool, sadly I can't take it back. All I can do is explain how it happened, and I'm very ashamed by it" he said and she massaged her forehead "I didn't think that going to you was an option. I wasn't myself before you left, then you were gone and I was lost, I couldn't think straight, I was drunk most of the time" he whispered getting closer, she looked up with sadness in her eyes.

"I regret leaving you, so much" she said with tears in her eyes, and his heart broke. He didn't want her to feel regret, he deserved what he got "Back then, every time I tried to spent time with you, you ended up arguing with me about anything. You were barely home, you left too early or got home too late, you didn't want to see me or talk to me. And I was so pregnant and emotional, I couldn't take it anymore. I was scared that you would leave me so I left"

"I'm so sorry I made you feel like that. You didn't deserve any of it…"

"Don't say that" she interrupted him "I was a coward, I should have stay and help you with everything you were going through, I should have been there to remind you who you are, to remember you how much I love you. Instead I took the easy way out. I just left and at the moment blame you for it. Of course it didn't last me, I knew I was the one to blame, I was the one who left" she said with passion cleaning a tear that left her eye. He didn't know what to say, it was not about words, is about showing, with her it's always been about showing her how he feels. So he took the last step separating him from her and hugged her tightly. Her arms relaxed and after a few seconds she was hugging him back.

"We are two stubborn fools. It doesn't matter who's to blame when we separated, it doesn't matter because we are sorry about it, and more importantly we are here together now" he felt her chuckle in his shoulder and he chuckled too. He separated himself from her enough to look into her eyes, she smiled softly at him and he put a chaste kiss to her mouth.

"Ok, I'm done having that discussion, but I'm not done asking about Milah" she said and he smiled, to remember Emma's stubbornness doesn't match to live the real thing.

"Swan, do we really have to?" he asked, just hoping she'll realize it was futile to keep doing that.

"How would you feel if I tell you that I was sleeping with Graham until you arrive?" She asked and he tensed up. That was an image his mind didn't need, he frowned and Emma pull her body from his "See, can you understand now?" she asked and she got him there, because now he needs to hear her say that it never happened and if it did he needs as many details as possible, to then walk away, find Graham and deliver one or two punches on the face "Before you embarrass yourself by asking if it that really happened, It was an example, It never happened. Do you get my point now?" she asked and he nodded, she rolled her eyes.

"What is you need to know about Milah, I don't think there is something of importance on that tale"

"There is a thought that doesn't leave me. The last time we made love was in New York. I know you had the accident and all…but I can't stop associating seeing her in New York and not wanting to have sex with me anymore, then I found out you flew to her…" he wanted to scream of frustration and laugh at the same time, how can this unbelievably beautiful woman think he didn't want her, and even worst that he prefer Milah over her.

"Since the moment I met you I wanted you, even when I knew you were sleeping with my roommate, even when you were someone else's girlfriend I wanted you. You don't want to know the thoughts I had of you back then, and when I finally could put my hands on you it got worst, there is not such a thing as having my fill of you and leaving as you are suggesting, I'll never be over with you, Emma. It is not about sex, is about love. And I love you"

"I love you too" she whispered back. They collided into each other kissing as if they never have kissed before. The kiss became more and more passionate, clothes was tossed aside carelessly around her home. He showed her exactly what he meant, taking advantage of the baby being somewhere else.

"I'm sorry about Milah showing up in here" he apologized a few minutes after making love to her, her head on his shoulder, her whole pressed to his.

"Yeah well, I hope that doesn't happen again"

"I don't think it will" he replied. Felling happy, maybe tonight he can take them back to their house. Maybe he will convince her she should move in. He has not only her back, he has Henry too, he is not letting go this time.

* * *

A/N: So, we are getting closer to the end, obviously. Still a couple of lose ends, I'll try to wrap them up as good as I can. Hope you are still enjoying this story, I vow to finish it, so I will. Thank for reading and let me know your thoughts, it makes me happy:)

See you at the next chapter!


	26. Chapter 26

**Emma.**

She walked into Killian's house, Henry in her arms, followed by Killian who was carrying Henry's diaper bag and a bag with the necessary things for them to spend the night. She took a look around, the furniture that filled their home at Boston, was now inside this house, and it surprised her how much at home she felt. She looked at Henry's face and she felt for the first time that she was bringing him home, their real home.

She walked into the living room, feeling a knot forming on her throat, it was in that couch were they spent a lot of time holding each other, reading books, Killian talking to her belly, memories she cherish. It looks different in the surroundings of this new house in a totally different town, but somehow it's even better in here. She looked into Killian's eyes, he looked anxious, and she knows she has tears hanging in the corners of her eyes. She took another look around, there are so many little things she remembers, so many memories scattered around in every object.

"Welcome home, love" he said. And she took a deep breath, trying to hold the tears that were forming in her eyes. She looked at him and smiled widely, he mirrored her smile "I have another surprise" he said and came closer to take Henry from her arms, the baby went into Killian's arms happily. Killian walked towards the stairs and stopped to wait for her. She just couldn't walk away from the living room, it was silly, but she felt as if she walked out everything would disappear and she will lose the strong feeling of home. But her curiosity over Killian's other surprise was stronger so she followed him upstairs.

"So, this is Henry's room" he announced when they stopped in front of the bedroom he chose for the baby "We'll have to decorate it further but for now it suits" he explained looking nervous.

"If he doesn't have to sleep on the floor it's alright" she joked and he smiled.

"Have a look" he said stepping aside to let her in.

The first and only thing she saw as she walked in was the baby crib they bought a New York, the one she fell in love with, the one he was so stubborn to ensemble by himself injury and all, the one that made them fight more than once, the one she thought she'll never see Henry sleep in. The teddy bear that was sitting next to the little pillows caught her attention, a pirate Teddy bear, the first thing Killian bought for Henry, the first toy Henry owned but had never even seen until now.

Killian sat the baby in the middle of the crib, and Henry grabbed the bear immediately. He took his cellphone out and took a couple of pictures of Henry. The baby's love for the pirate bear was evident, he is smiling beautifully and holding the bear towards her, showing it to her. That's when a tear ran down her face. Killian was there instantly hugging her.

"I thought I'll never see him sleeping there" she said pressed to his chest.

"I know, me too" he held her tight, until Henry called for their attention and they chuckled turning towards him.

A few hours later Emma was sitting on the couch in front of the chimney, a fire burning in it, Killian was at the kitchen fetching a bottle of wine, Henry was sleeping on his bedroom. Emma's stare was focused on the fire but her thoughts were else were. She let out a content sight, and smiled, Killian sat next to her handing her a glass of wine, clinking his with hers.

"For our future" he said and she smiled nodding in agreement, both of them had a sip of their glasses, the both of them focused their eyes on the fire, the crackling of the fire the only noise in the house "Is it too soon to ask you to move in?" he asked suddenly, she could hear the smile on his voice and she turned to look at him.

"I think it is" she replied after looking at him for a few seconds, he kissed her head before asking why "because we did everything to soon the last time, and it didn't end well"

"Well last time we had a baby on the way" he explained

"Exactly, now we can take our time with things"

"Well we do need to have at least one date before you move in, I can grant you that" he said and she giggled.

"I hadn't thought of that, and you are right Mister"

"You'll have the best date I can give you in this town. Though I don't know if I can manage that on a Monday night"

"Well the date doesn't have to be tomorrow night, I can wait a few days" she said and he agreed.

There, cuddled in his arms she felt happy, really happy.

The next day it was a working day, that meant facing Graham which she wasn't too eager to do. She woke up having Killian right in front of her, sleeping peacefully, she stared at him for a couple of seconds, feeling so in love. She got up carefully, checked on Henry who was also sleeping still and went to the bathroom trying to make as little noise as she could.

When she got out of the bathroom Killian was not on the bedroom, neither was Henry at his. So she figured they were downstairs already. She got dress and ready for the day as fast as she could, so she could spent at least a couple of more minutes with her boys before leaving for work. They had breakfast together, and for the first time it felt as if they were really a family.

She walked through the Sheriff station's door and braced for whatever was going to happen with Graham now. She loves the job she is doing here, but she would gladly look elsewhere if she didn't feel comfortable anymore. Graham was sitting at his desk and his head jumped in her direction when she walked in. She went straight for her desk and he didn't waste time in following.

"Good morning, Emma. I think we need to talk" he said as greeting and she looked up from the computer she was turning on.

"Yeah, I guess we do" she replied. He walked towards his office and she guessed she had to follow, so she did. Graham sat at his desk and pointed at the chair in front of it for her to sit. She did.

"I don't think there is a right way to apologize for what I did, I spent the entire weekend thinking about this chat and I know I already lost your respect and trust. So all I've got is honesty, that's all I can offer" he said and made a pause looking into her eyes, she was staring back waiting, and curious for whatever he was going to say next "I don't know how it happened or when, but I fell for you, and I knew that being coworkers I had to treat it carefully. You are an amazing, wonderful woman and I waited, because it was easy to notice your heart was broken, and I just wanted to be there for you as a friend. I spent so much time with you and Henry…Suddenly this man walked into town and there is light in your eyes again…I hated that it wasn't me who put it there…" he made pauses, he was obviously trying to explain himself and Emma was paralyzed listening "and I was upset because he broke your heart, he left Henry and he left you behind…You came here to rebuild your life, but you took him back, right away you took him back…"

"Things are not the way you think they are. Killian never left us" she said and Graham looked surprised. She hated this conversation already, she doesn't have to tell him her story, this was Killian's and her issues, their relationship.

"That morning at Granny's when you introduced us I felt so stupid, the way you look at him…The dreadful night I kissed you I was drunk. I found out he bought a house in town, a big beautiful house, and I know it is for you Emma, he loves you, and he loves Henry so much, so I drank my lost away. I've seen him with Henry, and I have asked people and everyone likes him, they say how adorable he is with Henry, and what a beautiful couple the two of you make. I kind of started to accept it, you know…But then I saw him screaming to another woman, having an argument that can only be a lover's quarrel. And I had it, I figured he wasn't the person everyone thought he was, he had someone else…." He massaged his forehead for a second before continuing "I was so drunk when I saw you at Granny's, you look sad and unhappy and I knew it had everything to do with that woman. In my drunken state I thought that maybe if I show you how beautiful you are, if I showed you that you have other options…I was wrong, and I'm glad he was there to interfere" he said looking ashamed and abated. She was frowning, this was more information than she was expecting, she wanted him to apologize and to tell her it was not gonna happen again, but he is now proclaiming his love or something and she doesn't know what to do, but before she could say anything, Graham continued "I'm so sorry, Emma" he murmured.

"Let me be clear here, you and I is not going to happen. I'm back with Killian and he moved into town. Whatever impression you think you have about our relationship is wrong, because you don't have all the facts, and I'm not going to shared them, because is private. Killian is not just someone I just met, that maybe if you kiss me I'm going to forget about, We've been through a lot and I love him, I really and undoubtfully love him. He is Henry's father and it was not his choice to be out of our lives for so long, he is not the villain of our story…And about that woman, I know who she is, I know about her, that's all I'm going to say about the matter" she said being serious and he nodded "I know we can be friends again, somewhere in the future when this lack of your judgement is forgotten" she got up wanting to wrap this conversation, he nodded again, she turned around to walk out of his office but turned around again "You are a great guy, when you are not kissing unexpected women on the street in a drunken state. You will find someone wonderful to love and who loves you back. Look at me, I thought that was not going to happen. I was holding tight to a terrible relationship because I thought no one else would love me. Then Killian walked into my life, and proved me wrong" She said and gave him a little smile he mirrored. She walked straight to her desk and tried to busy herself to left all the awkwardness behind.

 **Killian.**

"When can you be here to babysit Henry an entire night?" he asked at his phone.

"Woaw…So you have plans for an entire night, that means everything is more than fine" he heard the musical voice of Tink teasing him.

"They are. And I want to take Emma on a date. I just kind of hoped to have her to myself the entire night. And I don't want to impose on the Nolan's. I know they wouldn't decline but auntie Tink is been away too long anyway".

"Oh my gosh, I have and I hated every minute of it. I started to regret bringing you back" she joked giggling "I miss Henry so much, but August and I, we thought it was best to left the two of you alone for a while to figure things out"

"Yeah, I think you did good. But now you can come back again anytime you want. You've got to see the house"

"I've got to…Look, I think I can be there Friday afternoon"

"That sounds perfect. The date will be at Friday then, don't call to Granny's for reservations. You'll stay at Emma's"

"So you'll have the house for yourself. You are so clever Mister Jones"

"Well yeah, but I'm also thinking of Henry, he has all his things there so it makes sense"

"Then I'll see you guys on Friday. I can't wait" she exclaimed with excitement.

At lunch time Killian walked into the Sheriff station pushing Henry's stroller. He wants for them to have lunch together, but to be honest he's impatient to know how was Emma's talk to her boss this morning. Henry spotted his mom faster than he did, his excited noises said so. Emma looked up from her desk and her smile spread so beautifully, that he couldn't do much than stare at her with a big smile of his own. She jumped out of her chair and almost ran to them, when she was taking Henry out of the stroller he took a look around and it seems they are alone. Emma noticed.

"He is out on a round" she explained getting closer and kissing his mouth briefly.

"We are here to take you out for lunch, if you are up to" he said caressing her cheek.

"Granny's? I've been thinking of a grilled cheese all morning" she explained and he chuckled.

"Your heart's desire, Swan" he admitted, because that's all he wants for her.

"Did you listen to that, Henry? I'm going to be seriously spoiled from now on" she tickled the baby's belly getting a giggle from him "Ok, I have an hour, let's make the best of it" she said and then sat Henry back on his stroller.

They walked to Granny's and he remembered the first time he entered this town, and how he imagined Emma with a faceless man walking around town, he is so lucky that man is him, he is not going to take it for granted.

They sat at what was becoming their booth at the diner, Henry busy with a chewing toy. He couldn't hold it anymore "how was your morning?" he asked knowing she will get the meaning of his question, she sighed.

"It was weird. I was expecting an awkward talk with a bit of an apology in it. But what I get was a love proclamation. I wasn't ready for that one" she said, her face contorted in discomfort. He was not surprised, but he wasn't exactly ok with it either.

"Well, Swan. The man tried to kiss you. I think there is a hint in that" he responded.

"He didn't try, he succeeded at it" and he thought he rather believe he stopped it in time.

"Well, I know for a fact what one of your kisses can do to a man" he said caressing her hand "But he better don't get any ideas of having a repeat performance, I don't think I can hold myself twice" he said letting lose all of his charm and Emma rolled her eyes, he smiled feeling happy, his threat was real but there was no reason to take Graham seriously, they are here together "I have news. I found a babysitter for our date, and she can take care of Henry all night long if you agree" he said changing the subject. Emma opened her eyes wide and his suspicion that Emma hasn't spent one single night away from Henry since he was born was confirmed.

"I don't think we should abuse David and Mary Margaret's willingness to help out" she used as an excuse, valid but an excuse.

"We are not. I called reinforcement….How do you feel about leaving Tink and Henry having a sleepover at your place?" he asked, hoping for Emma to be in. If she is not, he can live with it, but he hopes she is open to the idea.

"Well…" Emma was interrupted by the waitress who took their order. After the girl walked away Emma turned to look into his eyes "What are exactly your plans that we need a babysitter for an entire night?" she asked with a mischievous smile. He smiled back raising one of his eyebrows.

"Well, darling. I believe we should go big, after a nice dinner date, we go and celebrate being together again…hopefully with a naked party" he whispered the last sentence getting as closer as he could and winking at her before leaning back. Emma's cheeks were immediately pink and he loves it.

"Ok. Tink has spent a lot of time with Henry before, I have not left her alone an entire night but she has helped me before…" Emma looked at Henry who was still happily biting the chewing toy, massaging his inflamed gums "Henry sleeps the entire night anyway, and we will be just a call away and at your place I'm guessing…" she looked into his eyes and he nodded "I think it will be alright. I'm sure they'll have fun" he smiled widely, he was looking forward for her agreeing.

"Fantastic, love. That'll be Friday night" he announced.

They had a nice lunch, and he walked her back to her job place. When they were almost there he remembered his meeting for the afternoon.

"Love, I forgot to tell you. I'm going to check on an office space close to the docks. I found it on the paper earlier and called. Hopefully the space is all I need"

"Oh that's wonderful. You are really moving here" she said in awed and he smiled softly.

"So the house was not good enough to prove it?" he teased.

"Of course it is. Is just…I kind of figured you were going to be away all of the time taking care of your business" she confessed.

"Well, I'll have to travel sometimes. But my place is right here with the two of you, there's nowhere else I rather be" he stopped her in front of the Sheriff Station. And caressed her cheek, wanting to make her feel he is being honest. When they were about to kiss the door of the station was opened from the inside. The both of them turned to look at the intruder. It was Graham walking out, and stopping in his tracks when he noticed them.

"Oh, sorry…Ummm…I forgot something in the car" he said and walked away awkwardly. Killian got serious and stepped away from Emma.

"He really wants me to believe he didn't saw us through the glass doors?" he asked sarcastically.

"Easy, tiger…Be nice. I have to get back to work" she stepped in front of him, pulling up on her toes kissing his mouth briefly "I love you" she said looking into his eyes.

"I love you" he replied. She smiled and kneeled in front of Henry's ride. She said her goodbyes and walked inside. Before he could turn to walk away, Graham was walking back straight towards him, he frowned and waited.

"I don't trust you. I don't think you deserve them. But she is happy, and is all that matters. Just have in mind that I'm right here waiting" Graham said menacingly. Killian gave a dark chuckle and shook his head softly.

"I guess you'll get tired of waiting at some point, because I'm not going anywhere. I don't care who you are, or what badge you carry with you, you don't scare me. Don't you ever touch her again." He said darkly. Henry made a noise getting bored of sitting there without moving and Killian's attention went to him "Now if you excused me I have to take my boy home" he didn't even turn to look at Graham, he felt content to have the opportunity to say what he really wanted to say.

* * *

Note: I'm so sorry for the delay. May was the craziest month of year so far. I worked and worked and worked, and kept on working. I could take a couple of days so hopefully I'll post the next chapter soon. Thanks for reading and I hope you let me know what you think.


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